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Sexual Habits of Indians

Sexual Habits of Indians

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A brief article on sexual habits and promiscuity in India especially in th e20th century and the inter-caste mixing, the sexual exploits of rajas, mutt heads ,religious leaders and rich land-lords exploiting weaker sections and women,other historical situations which encouraged all these...
A brief article on sexual habits and promiscuity in India especially in th e20th century and the inter-caste mixing, the sexual exploits of rajas, mutt heads ,religious leaders and rich land-lords exploiting weaker sections and women,other historical situations which encouraged all these...

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Published by: Dr Srinivasan Nenmeli -K on Dec 21, 2009
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Sexual Habits of Indians
 N K SrinivasanI am writing this article to inform and illuminate our society about the sexual habits of different communities/groups/sects on various parts of India…Along with culturaldiversity and material differences, Indians have a variety of interesting sexual habitsacross the nation..I am not specifically addressing the sexual habits and mores of our tribals as they have been studied in great detail by anthropologists. Not withstanding thenice classifications of sexual intercourse in Vatsyayana ‘s
 Kamasutra,
and midieval periodoic literature, we must scrutinize the sexual habits of different social levels andcaste groups.Within the familyIndian society was revolving around joint family system for ages…particularly invillages…Several brothers lived under the same roof with their father….mainly to preserve joint property…Each son had one or two rooms for his wife and children. Or small apartments in a large house with a central courtyard...…they shared common bathrooms, kitchen, dining space and of course, family altar…In such a close living of brothers with their wives, promiscuity was common…no onewinked an eye lid..often it so happened that the mother encouraged a woman taking her husband’s brother—elder or younger to bed as often as possible…this was common whenthe husband went out of the village or city on business or even for war if he was in thearmy. Even when the husband was away for a few days on some errands, the woman hadsex with husband’s brother….There were specific situations too…when the husband diedand the young woman became a widow…Since widow remarriage was unacceptable inmost cases, [even though laws and acts have been passed to favor remarriage,] thewidow became a source of pleasure for the younger boy. Most often the younger  brother’s wife would tolerate or acquiesce with the situation though frequent quarrelsand squabbles may erupt due to this relationship…if the widow was strong andattractive, this was favored and no elder raised any objection…the children of the elder  brother were taken care of by the joint family….In some communities/castes who were trading people, often spending several months indistant lands --Malayasia, Singapore,Middle east or some African country--- it wasaccepted that the wife would seek regular sex pleasure from husband’s younger  brother..The wife herself may suggest to her husband that such a relationship would befavored during his absence….Most often, the woman may become pregnant, when thehusband would return for a few weeks to silence the wagging tongues---to suggest thatthe husband only sired the child! Often this was not looked into by relatives andfriends.The woman was ,of course, available when the husband returned…this1
 
arrangement was considered safe and acceptable to the alternative of the woman goingastray and seek men outside the family.Maternal uncle occupies a special place in the family circuit…in former days, this unclehelps his sister through money, arranging marriages and most importantly, support hissister if she becomes a widow. Several maternal uncles , however, exploited thissituation..They took the sister’s daughter for sexual pleasures often before the younggirl’s marriage…If the uncle lived in a town or big city, the ruse was that he can providefor her studies in the city [which is lacking in the villages] and take the girl into hishousehold. When the girl stays with him, the uncle will have plenty of opportunities tohave sex with her…..It may happen that this affair would become known to his wife andshe would remain silent .After a few years, the uncle himself would arrange for the girl’smarriage and transfer the used property to an unsuspecting bridegroom…..In some cases,I have heard that this relationship between uncle and the girl may continue on a subduednote after her marriage too. This relationship is so common that no one raises any eye- brow in Indian society.There is a variation of this also. A young man often has relationship with his father’ssister or paternal aunt if she happens to be young and voluptuous…If she is a widow, shemay be staying with her brother , and the boy has endless opportunity to spend time withher . The widowed aunt ,being experienced in sexual matters, becomes a free instructor tothe young boy in the art of sex…this is the reason that no one read any of the sex manualsin India before their marriage..Unfortunately this relationship also may continue after theyoung man acquires a wife. He would visit his aunt often and have secret sex with her…If the father happens to know, he would be in no position to censure his sister or hisson….the young man’s wife would soon learn about this and may indirectly hint this andeven quarrel about this…nothing happens,though.In the neighborhoodMost people will tell you that that the Hindu society is caste-ridden with rigid caste barriers…..True, the inter-caste marriages are not accepted [except in recent times incities] and the couple may be ostracized and sent out of the home. But inter-caste mixingwith promiscuity is quite common and even widely prevalent in almost all villages andsmall towns….The present account is based on the information I have received frommany elders in Tamil Nadu where I hail from, Karnataka where I live and AndhraPradesh where I have many friends..…[While inter-racial mixing bothers westerners,inter-caste mixing has been a subtle and well –structured process in Indian society!] In most villages, the rich landlords and priests [read Brahmins] with large landholdings [50 to 200 acres of lands ] had one or more mistresses in the neighboring citywhich they would frequent.. The mistresses were drawn from families of musicians anddancers, though the system of devadasis [temple dancers/prostitutes] have been bannedand had almost disappeared…These are free-lance artistes who become the concubinesentered into movie world in the early 1950’s and later on in Tamil Nadu and AndhraPradesh.2
 
There was a peculiar situation obtaining in Tamil Nadu and elsewhere which isinteresting to study. The barbers and their wives occupied a special place…The barbersalso became pipers [nadhaswaram and thavil or drummers] mainly to play in the temples.These men usually lent their wives to the rich landlords..most of the women were well- built and fair –skinned ,unlike the common women who were quite dark and short... Therich lovers gave plenty of jewels and even houses to these musicians called Vidwans….I had intimate knowledge of many such families in younger days….about 50 years ago…How did the musician –husbands tolerate or turn a blind eye in almost every village…The barber women, usually older ones, acted as midwives and they were also skilledherbal medicine to women.. they usually administered herbal medicine to ‘dissolve’ afoetus or abort an unwanted pregnancy…this came in handy not only for young women but also to barber women who went regularly to sleep with upper caste men…Sometimes, the pregnancy went full-course….This situation went on smoothly in most villagesthat the barber families and the upper caste families lived with symbiotic relationship .It is interesting to note that the upper caste , priestly family, Brahmin men will nottolerate non-vegetarian or meat food and would close their eyes seeing a lamb carcass,would freely have sex with these women who ate such food…often they would swallowspecial pills with fragrance and essences to mask the smell of the flesh from thesewomen….These hypocritical men would consider these men and women as filthy whiletalking to other men, but secretly have sex with them regularly. …I knew a pundit whowas a family priest in our neighborhood, very scholarly and would recite Vedas andother sacred scriptures, who had a concubine of lower caste living with him after thedeath of his wife……she even cooked food for him….no doubt, many Brahmins stoppedinviting him to their houses….this priest became a sanskrit teacher to youngsters ….How did the Upper caste women take all these and tolerate?…For the most part ,theywere tied to the homes and attended to the family chores….They were called “griha-lakshmis’ the Lakshmis to attract prosperity for the family..While many were religiousminded , bogged down in numerous rituals and festivals, some ventured out..as I said inthe previous section and sought lovers from near relations…In Temples and MathasMathas are temple monasteries ,with an abbot or pontiff, mainly to institute religiousstudies, train priests and make publications. These mathas or mutts , in course of time , became rich and powerful. Many were richly endowed by rajas and local chieftains andzamindars or land owners…[Unfortunatley much of these endowed lands of many mathashave been grabbed by politicians in the last five decades.] The heads of mathas or  pontiffs were often so powerful that they acted as local politicians . They took todebauchery.The mathas and temples became havens for young widows. They became , invariablymistresses of pontiffs or math heads and also of rich priests. In turn, the mathas providedsome shelter and food –the ‘prasads’ or consecrated food after temple rituals.3

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