Tuesday, August 14, 2007

If I Did It by O.J. Simpson

Okay, I admit. I did it. I wanted to see what O.J. says in his book with the coy
title and the embattled history. The only good news (if we can even call it that)
is that the Goldman family will receive the majority of the profits (I saw a 90
percent figure..does this mean O.J. actually gets money off this?) Then that's
just one of many reasons I would use to encourage people never to buy a copy and
only read it online at one of the copyright-disrespecting sites as I did. There is
controversy over whether these online versions of the book are actual copies or
hoaxes.

Well, I just wanted to say if the version I read was legit, it's just another
example of how pathetic Orenthal James Simpson really is. Let me save you the
legwork. He uses the book to badmouth his victim, portrays her as a horrible human
being, wife, mother, etc. This goes on ad nauseam, a murderer setting up his
"justification."

The actual killing occurs when Goldman shows up at the backyard gate carrying an
envelope with Nicole's forgotten glasses in it (just as in the trial account).
O.J. is there with his good friend "Charlie," who has been badmouthing Nicole all
day, getting Simpson really worked up. She merely left her glasses at the
restaurant and Mr. Goldman was returning them. Good Samaritan. As simple as that.
But "Sherlock Simpson" notices that the dog wags his tail when he sees Ronald
Goldman, and since he's already brandishing an unsheathed knife why not just slice
and dice one's problems away. His account has Nicole come running out the back
door defending what he's now certain is one of her affairs (after all, dog's tails
don't lie...why they're almost as reliable as DNA!) and falling down...he gifts us
with a few paragraphs illustrating his "bravado," tells us how Mr. Goldman
allegedly assumed a defensive karate stance and how he (O.J.) ridiculed him and
baited him. All of this while Nicole is on the ground because she (cough)
"tripped" in her lascivious ardor.

Then he does the ultimate cop-out. He has no idea what happened next. He only
knows he's covered in blood, so much blood that his clothing is sticking to his
body and his shoes are covered. He has absolutely no idea what has happened. But
his friend "Charlie" is just horrified and shaking and indicates that O.J. has
done the killings. But he's, like, innocent and stuff. Because he, like, can't
remember. It was just kill and instant amnesia two minutes later. That's an
exciting sort of confession, isn't it?

This salebrity is a dumb amoeba-like scum-plasm sucking life from the planet. If
he had any decency he would have killed himself years ago...well, before he
commited the murders. Congrats, O.J....she'll never touch another man. Maybe you
can like build a shrine to her now that she's "purified." You protected your
"honor," and that's what this book is all about too, isn't it? Don't worry, guys
in the Mob will know just what you're talking about...some bitches just gotta
learn...