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Beer

Beer

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Published by Brainwines.com
Glory Be To Beer
Boiled flowers, fungi sex, dirty whirlpools and ant colony algorithms.
By Keith B. Hoffman
Are you aware that one of your favourite things to drink is a waste product from a sexual orgy of fungi? I thought not. Yes, ethanol, sweet ethanol, is to yeast as you are to your morning constitutional, with, obviously, far more pleasing results. We humans cannot seem to function without yeast’s precious excrement, and we consume it in myriad forms, from pure (vodka), to dilutions in...
Glory Be To Beer
Boiled flowers, fungi sex, dirty whirlpools and ant colony algorithms.
By Keith B. Hoffman
Are you aware that one of your favourite things to drink is a waste product from a sexual orgy of fungi? I thought not. Yes, ethanol, sweet ethanol, is to yeast as you are to your morning constitutional, with, obviously, far more pleasing results. We humans cannot seem to function without yeast’s precious excrement, and we consume it in myriad forms, from pure (vodka), to dilutions in...

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Published by: Brainwines.com on Jan 28, 2010
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12/02/2011

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re you aware that one o your avouritethings to drink is a waste product rom asexual orgy o ungi? I thought not. Yes,ethanol, sweet ethanol, is to yeast as you are toyour morning constitutional, with, obviously, armore pleasing results. We humans cannot seemto unction without yeast’s precious excrement,and we consume it in myriad orms, rom pure(vodka), to dilutions in carriers such as the sideingredients which make a Sex on the Beach,Vesper Martini, Fuzzy Navel, and the imposingKookie rom Black Dog. Your
GOM 
melier has
A
Glory Be To Beer
By Keith B. Hofman
Bod ows, fung sx, dty whpoos and ant coony agoths.
already tackled some o our other ingeniousdelivery systems to enjoy ethanol—scotch, wine,rum, grappa, etc. oday, we investigate one o the most worldly and ancient o all alcoholicdrinks—beer.Eight-thousand years ago, a armer le somebarley outside in a shallow container. It rainedthat night. Te next morning the armer thoughthis harvest was ruined as it was steeped inrainwater. Over the next days o neglect the barley germinated and wild yeasts in the air waed ontothe sugary liquid leeching rom the sprouted
È
Where it all happens. In such unremarkable surrounds a process takes place to create mankind’s favourite tipple: beer. Where would we be without it?
grain. Te yeasts had a ne time o exhaustingthemselves in reproductive bliss. Te lucky armerenjoyed the resultant, low-alcohol and barely favoured beverage on the next sunny day. Hesuddenly ound his wie more attractive andeven hilarious. Beer was born.Tat liquid bread changed human society orever. Some historians claim it was the mostimportant driving orce behind ending ournatural nomadic tendencies. In other words,some believe that we need to thank beer orcivilization itsel.
 
Water sanitation is something we takeor granted now in many parts o the world.Tousands, to just dozens, o years ago thiswas ar rom the case. Water-borne diseaseswere a pestilent reality or all o our ancestors.Beer and distilled spirits, by virtue o containingalcohol, were liquids that drastically quelledbacterial contamination. In the case o beer,since it had lower alcohol content than wineand distilled liquors, even more preservationand decontamination eorts were needed.Until roughly the 12th century, beer wasexclusively avoured and ‘bittered’ with gruit—
for further reading...
Should you be drinking wine or beer or betterhealth? For you beer acionados, the news isgood. It turns out the scientic consensus isnow leaning toward either one. In other words,the magical “French Paradox”, that leads many to believe that wine is the most healthul way to imbibe, may not be totally accurate,as alcohol itsel is now thought to be thecardiovascular protectant.Just to assure you that more seriousscience is going on, everyday, toward theurther development o all that is beer, I pointyour attention to the ollowing two articles:“Enantioseparation o isoxanthohumolin beer by hydroxypropyl-gamma-cyclodextrin-modied micellar electrokineticchromatography”, and, “Preparation o novelsolid-phase microextraction bres by sol-gel technology or headspace solid-phasemicroextraction-gas chromatographic analysiso aroma compounds in beer.” Now then, resteasy, as you can see, the nerds are on it! Usually,this produces a good outcome.Also, rom the obviously underappreciated
 Journal of Colloid Interface Science
comes anarticle “Gushing in canned beer: the eect o ultrasonic vibration”. Tis beauty o a study startswith the memorable line—especially or a peer-reviewed scientic publication—o “Everybody has had the experience o a canned carbonateddrink overowing and soiling their clothes.”“We observed the beer drinking behaviouro 308 university students in several bar andparty settings. Te ollowing relationships wereound: males drinking beer in bars consumedmore than emales, and stayed in a bar or alonger time period; patrons drank signicantly more beer when drinking in groups and whenpurchasing beer in pitchers versus cups orbottles; and intervals between party arrivaland rst drink and between party departureand last drink varied inversely with bloodalcohol concentration.” Tank your lucky stars that these researchers made sucha set o startling discoveries!a mixture generally made o herbs such as gale,yarrow, heather, rosemary and occasionally,either by mistake or malice, items such as toxicnightshade. Te gruit herbs unctioned asstimulants, versus the now, totally dominant hops(more on them in a second), which are actually depressant in nature. As more was appreciatedabout beer spoilage, contamination, etc., gruitwas phased out rom around 1100 to 1516 whenBavarian brewers dumped it and implementedthe Reinheitsgebot in 1516: the rst ocial
È
A 15th century bishop takes a delivery of beer.
Í
The ofcial rules for brewingbeer date back to the 16th century.
Ofenwith excellententertainment value, most eldso scientic inquiry employ someoneready to ask a ar toodetailed questionabout a givensubject. Tis ofenmaniests as theorcible ramming o a resh technologicaladvance down thethroat o an oldquestion. Whilethe science and arto brewing are indeed ascinating and complex,perhaps these guys went a bit ar in theirexplorations o ermentation methods: “Antcolony system algorithm or the optimization o beer ermentation control.” However, and muchto their credit, they displayed a rare moment o printed scientic humbleness, by concluding that“the satisactory results obtained did not requiremuch computation eort”. When ants nally take over the world, and learn to read, they willprobably get a big kick out o that publication.Finally, rom the overstued les o the“Why was this study done, and who the hellpaid or this?” comes some shocking ‘ndings’:

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