Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Episode 1
Some Guys Have All the Luck.
By
Martin Mulrooney
Notes
Also, the episodes are all named after Robert Palmer songs:
The reason for this will also become apparent in the pilot
episode.
2.
VENDER
Anything else I can getcha there
pal?
'But you can reach the top of your profession. If you become
the leader of the land. For murder is the sport of the
elected. And you don't need to lift a finger of your hand.'
VENDER
Geez, what's his fucking problem?
The SCARRED MAN stops, his eyes darting left and then right,
before pulling a pistol from beneath his jacket. He slowly
inches around the corner, gun aimed, steady.
DIABLOS
This is fruitless! What do you
possibly hope to achieve by fleeing
in this way? I am in charge now.
You shall answer to I, Diablos
before the night is through! Now,
SHOW YOURSELF!
He tries to stop his momentum and digs his heels into the
ground, yet it is too late and he finds himself hurtling
towards the sharp drop beyond. He balances precariously
on the edge before throwing himself backward and falling
into a heap on the dirt floor. As he picks himself up, he
realises that the HOODED PURSUERS are blocking the way
back, their torches casting the daunting congregation in
an ethereal glow. One of their number steps forwards.
DIABLOS
So, are you ready to turn yourself
in, murderer?
HOODED FIGURE
(Deeply)
AND WHY WOULD I DO THAT?
DIABLOS
(Laughing)
You are a murderer! And I don't
mean all the ones that were on the
clock, oh no. This one was off the
books.
DIABLOS (CONT'D)
Punishment is extermination. This
one is authorised. Are you ready?
HOODED FIGURE
(Deeply)
NOT QUITE YET.
DIABLOS
GET BACK HERE!
The HOODED FIGURE leans forward and falls over the edge of
the cliff, muttering unheard incantations as he goes.
Beyond, there is only blackness. As DIABLOS cries out in
fury, he falls down and looks over the edge, his scythe
slicing and burying itself into the solid rock of the cliff.
The other HOODED PURSUERS rush to look over as well, just
in time to see the HOODED FIGURE suddenly evaporate into
thin air.
5.
DIABLOS (CONT'D)
I want him found! NOW!
DISPATCHER
(Through electronic
crackling.)
Alright fellas, I hope you're all
working your asses off out-
CAB DRIVER
Goddamn dispatcher. If I need my
five minutes rest at 4 in the
freaking morning, I'll have it.
He closes his eyes and lets the music wash over him.
CAB DRIVER
What the HELL...hey Mr...MR! Are
you okay? Jesus, did you jump
from the roof of that building?
What, are you trying to kill
yourself?! And what's with the
cape-
The HOODED FIGURE picks himself up, walks past the wide-
eyed CAB DRIVER, and gets into the back seat of the yellow
cab, which now has a huge dent and a smashed advertisement
adorning its roof. The CAB DRIVER stands there speechless
for several seconds, before climbing back into the driver's
seat and turning around to face this peculiar passenger.
HOODED FIGURE
(Deeply)
JUST DRIVE.
CAB DRIVER
Screw that! Get out right now, I-
HOODED FIGURE
(Deeply)
TAKE ME TO MANHATTAN MINI STORAGE,
570 RIVERSIDE DRIVE.
CAB DRIVER
Fuck this! Get the hell outta-
The HOODED FIGURE pulls back the hood on his robe to reveal
a perfect skull. The sockets stare at the CAB DRIVER, deep,
black, empty voids, as the lower jaw moves up and down
with the words that follow.
HOODED FIGURE
(Deeply)
STEP ON IT... OR ELSE.
HOODED FIGURE
(Deeply)
KEEP THE CHANGE.
The HOODED FIGURE turns to look out over the Hudson River.
Although the skull can show no real expression, the figure
seems lost in thought. Faint blurs of faraway seagulls
call out in the rapidly lightening morning. The HOODED
FIGURE turns and walks towards the warehouse.
He has barely walked for more than ten seconds before the
warehouse behind him explodes in a huge ball of flame,
reflecting brightly onto the Hudson River. He doesn't turn
back to watch the warehouse burn, flames flickering upwards,
as sirens start to wail in the distance.
CAB DRIVER
Hey man, how long ya been in da
big apple?
BUSINESSMAN
(Deeply)
NOT-
BUSINESSMAN (CONT'D)
Not very long. I just decided to
drop in at the last minute.
The CAB DRIVER focuses his attention back onto the road.
CAB DRIVER
Ah man! I wish I could come and
go! Not much freedom when ya drive
one of these ya know! Ten thousand
up front jus for da privilege!
BUSINESSMAN
I am not sure... yet. Just killing
time at the moment. Don't worry...
I have money.
CAB DRIVER
I am insulted man! I never doubted
that! Just curious! Crazy morning
so far I have ta say, goddamn
terrorists.
BUSINESSMAN
Terrorists?
CAB DRIVER
You ain't heard man?! Blew up a
warehouse not far from were you
were picked up man!
BUSINESSMAN
Let me out here.
STREET CLEANER
What do you think?
BUSINESSMAN
Pardon?
STREET CLEANER
The new tower? What do you think?
BUSINESSMAN
Oh. I'm not sure.
STREET CLEANER
Me either. I guess some things
that are broken just can't be fixed.
Take that guy over there.
BUSINESSMAN
Why are you here every morning?
TROUBLED MAN
(Defensively)
I feel drawn to this place.
Everything changed here... why are
you here at 6 in the morning anyway?
BUSINESSMAN
I... felt drawn here also. You
have 22 years, 5 days, 4 hours and
34 minutes, 25 seconds left.
TROUBLED MAN
(Confused)
What? What does that even mean...
you're English, right? The accent
isn't very strong...
BUSINESSMAN
Sure. English.
TROUBLED MAN
So you haven't been here before?
BUSINESSMAN
I have been here many times. I was
here when this happened.
TROUBLED MAN
On business?
BUSINESSMAN
Always. It was a very busy day,
that day.
TROUBLED MAN
Did you help? A lot of people seemed
to want to help, however they could.
There has not been one day since
that I haven't come back here.
11.
BUSINESSMAN
I helped the best way I knew how.
That day though...my job held no
pleasure for me.
TROUBLED MAN
Are you something to do with the
government?
BUSINESSMAN
Erm... no. Not really.
TROUBLED MAN
Oh, okay. But you don't wanna
tell me what you do, I can tell
that much. I'm Mason by the way.
Henry Mason.
HENRY
And you are?
BUSINESSMAN
I am... Mr Ekerot.
HENRY
Nice to meet you. They wouldn't
let me get his final message you
know. I was sure the wall safe
would protect his laptop. He said
before we got cut off that he had
left me a message on there. That
was just as the tower collapsed...
and I never got that laptop. The
government, all that red tape...
HENRY (CONT'D)
All I want is to hear his final
words! It drives me insane! No
payoff, no cheque can substitute
that kind of closure!
BUSINESSMAN
You still mourn? It's been nearly
8 years...
HENRY
IT COULD BE A HUNDRED GODDAMN YEARS
AND I WON'T FORGET!
BUSINESSMAN
I am sorry.
HENRY
It's fine...I'm... I apologise.
12.
BUSINESSMAN
Leave it with me. I'll see what I
can do.
MANAGER
Okay, okay. I'm here. What do you
want?
MR EKEROT
A room please.
MANAGER
Goddamn comedian here. What kinda
room?
MR EKEROT
Room for one, for one night.
MANAGER
Talk about stating the obvious.
Anything else with that?
MR EKEROT
I wouldn't smoke anymore.
MANAGER
WHAT?!
MR EKEROT
You have less than a week.
MANAGER
Listen pal, I do what I want, when
I want. No limey jerk is gonna
tell me otherwise either.
MANAGER (CONT'D)
Besides, I'm the picture of health.
MANAGER (CONT'D)
What name?
MR EKEROT
Ekerot
MANAGER
First name?
13.
MR EKEROT
Hmm... he was playing in the cab
as well.
MANAGER
(Clicking his fingers)
Huh? Hey pal, over here! First
freaking name?
MR EKEROT
Robert.
MANAGER
Robert Ekerot. Figures.
The MANAGER turns and takes a key from the hook behind
him.
MANAGER (CONT'D)
Twenty dollars up-front.
MANAGER (CONT'D)
And you can show yourself up.
TALL MAN
Shit! What the hell...
MR EKEROT
(Deeply)
SHUT UP AND TELL ME WHAT ROOM YOU
ARE IN.
TALL MAN
Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no... it's
you. Ohhh god oh god...
MR EKEROT
(Deeply)
WHAT ROOM NUMBER.
TALL MAN
It's...oh god. It's room 101, floor
14...well it's 13 but they skip
that floor here because...well
it's just the top floor. The whole
top floor. It's a penthouse! Look...
MR EKEROT
(Deeply)
SHUT UP.
MR EKEROT
Robert Palmer, you got anything by
him?
TALL MAN
Hey...what? Look, let me down and
I'll get you whatever you need,
please...
MR EKEROT
No matter. Found it.
MR EKEROT (CONT'D)
It's strange. I know I shouldn't...
but I seem to enjoy the music I
hear recently.
TALL MAN
What's going on? Please...
MR EKEROT
(Deeply)
DON'T INTERRUPT ME!
MR EKEROT (CONT'D)
I don't know why, but I really
like this artist. Listen...
MR EKEROT (CONT'D)
Now, I know that you know who I
am. I also know that I didn't kill
whoever they say I did. Talk.
TALL MAN
Look, I don't...
MR EKEROT
(Deeply)
TALK!
TALL MAN
Okay! Look, I don't know how or
why they did it, but it's been
known by everyone that Diablos
wanted you gone!
MR EKEROT
Who is the scarred man?
TALL MAN
He's nobody, just some loose end,
a guy living on borrowed time...
(MORE)
16.
MR EKEROT
Why isn't anybody higher up stepping
in then?
TALL MAN
You guys are supposed to be fate
itself! It is fate, for better or
worse, what is happening!
Besides... you can't deny that you
have broken the rules before! How
about that guy who was killing all
the women back in-
MR EKEROT
Shut up. Stop changing the subject.
This was not my fate. It IS not.
This... this is ABSURD.
TALL MAN
You can't survive on earth. You
don't belong, you will change.
You already like goddamn music for
crying out loud! You're the fucking
Grim Reaper man! You ain't supposed
to like music for a start!
MR EKEROT
Things are going to change.
TALL MAN
They already have, for the worst!
Diablos is in charge now, he has
your job, he's Head Reaper!
Everybody has to take orders off
him!
MR EKEROT
Not me.
TALL MAN
Yeh, and how long can you last?
They will be looking for you,
everybody will be. They are already!
His two henchmen? They have the
authority to kill you on sight.
And death for you means that you
cease to exist. Why don't you just
turn yourself in?
MR EKEROT
You are very... stupid.
(MORE)
17.
MR EKEROT (CONT'D)
You say they will kill me. And
then you ask me to turn myself in?
TALL MAN
You aren't human! What does it
matter if you cease to exist? You're
a thing, a concept, a creation,
a...
MR EKEROT
(Deeply)
SHUT UP! SHUT YOUR MOUTH!
MR EKEROT (CONT'D)
For some time now... I have...lived.
Small amounts at a time. Visits to
earth... off the record. I don't
interact. I don't live like a human.
But I... read. I watch films...
I... I like it here.
TALL MAN
(In disbelief)
You...you can't.
MR EKEROT
I have. And I know that whatever I
am, I am alive, somehow. I... emote.
It isn't much, but it's growing.
And I want it to. I also want my
job back.
TALL MAN
Ain't gonna happen man. All the
evidence pointed to you! Your
scythe, heck it was even when you
were off duty! You have a history
of-
MR EKEROT
Make me a door. I want to speak to
Henry Mason's brother, he died
September 11th 2001 when the World
Trade Centre Collapsed.
TALL MAN
Grim Reaper sir, I can't, you
know...
MR EKEROT
(Deeply)
JUST DO IT.
MR EKEROT
Hello.
HENRY'S BROTHER
Hi.
MR EKEROT
Heaven or hell?
HENRY'S BROTHER
Well it isn't hell. I can't say
it's heaven though either.
MR EKEROT
Never as black and white as people
think.
HENRY'S BROTHER
To be honest, I think if your final
moments alive are in a burning
building as it collapses, anything
after doesn't seem so bad. Mind if
I smoke?
MR EKEROT
No.
HENRY'S BROTHER
I won't ask who you are.
MR EKEROT
I am the Grim Reaper. I met your
brother today.
HENRY'S BROTHER
You mean...I mean...is he...?
MR EKEROT
Oh. No. Nothing like that.
HENRY'S BROTHER
You had me worried there a second.
Is he okay?
MR EKEROT
He... misses you.
HENRY'S BROTHER
You aren't very good at this.
MR EKEROT
Pardon?
HENRY'S BROTHER
You don't express yourself very
well. Of course he misses me, I'm
dead.
MR EKEROT
Well... he hasn't let go. He said
he is being driven mad.
HENRY'S BROTHER
My message.
MR EKEROT
He never got it. Red tape, or
something.
HENRY'S BROTHER
Well, I hope you have a good
memory...
HENCHMAN #1
Somebody has made an illegal doorway
sir.
HENCHMAN #2
It wasn't him, but that doesn't
mean he isn't involved.
DIABLOS
Where?
HENCHMAN #1
New York.
HENCHMAN #2
Near Times Square.
DIABLOS
Such an... obvious place. But why
risk making a door so soon? He
has only just left. Can we find
the room?
HENCHMAN #1
No sir.
HENCHMAN #2
It must be an illegal room. We
will have to approach from the
location where the door was created.
DIABLOS
Very well. One question first.
HENCHMAN #1 & #2
(In unison)
Boss?
DIABLOS
WHY THE HELL ARE YOU HERE TALKING
ABOUT IT INSTEAD OF BEING ON THE
WAY THERE NOW?! GET YOUR SKINSUITS
ON AND CATCH THIS BASTARD!
HENRY'S BROTHER
You got all of that? You understand
what it means?
MR EKEROT
Yes. I am familiar with it actually.
Come to think of it...am I the
joker, or the thief?
HENRY'S BROTHER
(Laughing)
Both! I'm surprised that you grasp
popular culture so well.
MR EKEROT
I like smoking... it is relaxing.
HENRY'S BROTHER
It'll kill you in the end
apparently... not that we have to
worry about that.
MR EKEROT
I can't... it would...
21.
HENRY'S BROTHER
I'm dead already, remember? I
insist.
MR EKEROT
No problem. It is a... curious
message.
HENRY'S BROTHER
He will understand it.
MR EKEROT
I had best go.
HENRY'S BROTHER
Goodbye, Mr Ekerot.
TALL MAN
Erm... hi.
The HENCHMEN walk towards the TALL MAN. They have their
skinsuits on and looks like a pair of experienced doormen
that work for a busy nightclub. They wear matching bomber
jackets, reflective sunglasses and have shaven heads.
HENCHMAN #1
Where is he?
TALL MAN
He left! He's crazy! He likes music
now, and to fucking read and stuff!
HENCHMAN #2
Music?
TALL MAN
Exactly! He is less like you and
more like me! It doesn't make sense,
he-
HENCHMAN #1
Who did he visit through the door?
22.
TALL MAN
He never said, he-
HENCHMAN #2
WHO DID HE SEE!
TALL MAN
(Struggling to
breathe)
He...didn't...say!
HENCHMAN #1
I can see that your time is up.
TALL MAN
Huh, oh...
The tall man glances up at the numbers above his head, all
of which rest on zero.
HENCHMAN #1
Well, we would hate to leave ya
hanging...
The TALL MAN begins to scream loudly as, out of his view
from behind him, HENCHMAN #2 gets out his scythe...
HENRY
Hello?
MR EKEROT
Hello Henry.
HENRY
Who is this?
MR EKEROT
We met this morning.
HENRY
The guy in the business suit?
Mr...Mr Ekerot, right?
MR EKEROT
Yes, Mr Ekerot.
HENRY
Sooo... what can I do for ya?
MR EKEROT
I have what you asked for.
HENRY
Look, I don't even know how you
got this number, but this is one
helluva dirty trick to play, phoning
an-
MR EKEROT
He said he loved you. He said by
the time the phone cut off, he
didn't have enough time to get to
the laptop, to finish his message
like he promised. The tower
collapsed Henry.
HENRY
YOU DON'T KNOW THIS! YOU CAN'T
KNOW THIS! HE SAID HE WOULD LEAVE
ME THE MESSAGE IN HIS SAFE! HE
SAID...he said...
MR EKEROT
He said to send his love to the
family. He said the last thing he
did, the thing he wanted to record
on the laptop, was to put All Along
the Watchtower by Hendrix on in
his office full blast and sing
along, to feel human for one final
time before it was over, like when
you were kids in '69 at Downing
Stadium.
HENRY, his back still against the wall, slumps down until
he is in a sitting position.
HENRY
We... we loved that song so much.
The summer of 1969, who knew 30
years later we would be where we
are now, right? But... if he didn't
manage to get to his laptop, how
do you know all this? How could
you possibly know?
MR EKEROT
I hope this information gives you
some closure Henry.
HENRY
Where are you right now?
MR EKEROT
Goodbye, Henry.
The line clicks dead as Henry drops the phone to the ground.
He is already on his feet and headed for the door,
desperate. He blasts outside into the slight chill of an
approaching night, evening light fading. The whole world
seems to spin as HENRY crosses the road to a nearby
payphone, sprinting now. When he reaches the phone, he
immediately realises that he is too late. The phone is
dangling off the hook, swaying gently in the wind.
25.
HENCHMAN #1
Boss, we-
DIABLOS
Don't.
DIABLOS (CONT'D)
As the newly appointed Head Reaper,
I have to see to the day-to-day
running of this organisation. What
do you think that entails?
HENCHMAN #2
Boss...
DIABLOS
WHAT DOES IT ENTAIL!
DIABLOS throws his glass into the open fire, causing flames
to jump up, illuminating him in a hellish orange glare as
he turns to face them.
26.
HENCHMAN #1
You oversee the other Reapers.
You oversee the names that are
chosen for the people on Earth,
the people who die. When they die.
Where. You hold the key to fate.
DIABLOS
Exactaly. I essentially control
the fates of everyone on earth.
DIABLOS (CONT'D)
So, in that case... what makes you
both think you aren't as...AS
EXPENDABLE, AS EVERYONE ELSE!
DIABLOS (CONT'D)
Thanatos has long been a bane in
my life. Just because he puts on a
skinsuit and calls himself something
else does not make him human! He
can read all the books he wants,
listen to all the music he desires,
but he cannot evade me! I WILL NOT
ALLOW HIM EVEN THE MISERABLE
EXISTANCE OF A WRECTHED HUMAN BEING
FOR ONE MORE SECOND! DO YOU
UNDERSTAND?
HENCHMAN #1 & #2
(Gasping for air)
Yes...boss. But... we think our
guy Larry from the Times Square
penthouse told him... he may know
he was set up...
HENCHMAN #1
What I wanna know is, why do we
even need to breathe in the first
place?
HENCHMAN #2
(Still recovering
from being strangled)
Shut...up...
DIABLOS
Don't let me down again. Actually...
I'm glad he knows. Now things can
get... interesting.
MR SCHAFER
Hell... hello?
MR EKEROT
Listen carefully. I know you have
lived here in New York for many
years, long after you were supposed
to have been reaped Mr Schafer. I
know this because I arranged for
this to happen. In such a situation
as I now find myself, this is
invaluable, because I need your
help.
MR SCHAFER
Wha... what is going on?
MR EKEROT
I have been framed for a murder I
didn't commit. Naturally, by default
I look guilty. I need money,
somewhere to stay and a new
identity.
MR EKEROT (CONT'D)
I have done... many bad things.
Some necessary, others... debatable.
But I didn't do this. Not this
time.
28.
MR SCHAFER
Is... is this...?
MR EKEROT
This is who the Hindus call Yama,
the Greeks refer to as Thanatos,
the Jews as the Angel of Death.
This is the Grim Reaper baby, and
I need to start a new life. I'm a
little rusty on the specifics of
living amidst the living as I am
sure you can imagine, so you will
need to help me, do whatever it
takes. The alternative is eternal
damnation. Meet me at Starbucks
between between 6th and 7th in
five hours. Make mine a latte.