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The Climate of a Healthy Relationship Part 5 - Honesty

The Climate of a Healthy Relationship Part 5 - Honesty

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Published by napovlee
Tips for healing your relationship
Tips for healing your relationship

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Published by: napovlee on Feb 04, 2010
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December 7, 2003
The Climate of Healthy Relationships
Part 5—Honesty
Relationships are built on trust and honesty. How can we create aclimate of honesty?1 John 1:71. Build ___________________________________________________________.Luke 16:10-112. Be _____________________________________________________________.Ephesians 4:25; Leviticus 19:11, Proverbs 12:22, 24:26, John 8:32,Colossians 3:9-103. Be _____________________________________________________________.Jeremiah 5:3, Proverbs 27:64. Know the _______________________________________________ of honesty.Ephesians 4:15, 1 Corinthians 13:6
 For Life Group Discussion:
What next step can you take to create a climate of trustand honesty in your relationships?
December 7, 2003
The Climate of Healthy Relationships
Part 5—Honesty
Most living things require light to thrive.
Plants and animals will not be healthy without the proper amount of sunlight.
People require light too. For example, some people suffer from SAD,seasonal affective disorder. As the days get shorter and there is lesssunlight, they may get depressed and moody. How many of you think yousuffer from SAD? SAD is treated by light; sometimes the person may useartificial lights, or sometimes they have to move to a lighter climate.Relationships need light too—the light of honesty, openness and transparency.Today, we wrap up our series on the climate of healthy relationships—we’retalking about honesty.
Offering and announcements: Introduction:
It’s only 10 days until the final installment of “The Lord of the Rings”comes out in theaters—woohoo! How many of you have read the books?Seen the movies? Don’t give a rip?One of the characters that will play a major role in the climax of thestory is Gollum. Originally, his name was Smeagol. While he wasswimming one day with a friend, he found a ring—it turned out to be TheRing—The One Ring of Power. Smeagol killed his friend to keep the ring,and ran far away and hid under a mountain, deep in the darkness. And therehe changed and became Gollum, a miserable creature, controlled by the ringand twisted by the darkness, living alone and in fear.Gollum is a parable of what happens to people when they choose to live in thedarkness of dishonesty rather than in the light. You end up lonely, afraid,miserable and twisted. The Bible says that God is light, and that we need to live inthe light.
1 John 1:7
But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we havefellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies usfrom all sin.If we want to have fellowship with God, if we want to have a close relationshipwith God, we need to walk in the light. We need to be living in the light,
Page 2truthfully, out in the open. If we live in the darkness, always hiding things, beingdeceitful, we’ll never have fellowship. Close relationships only happen in the light,in the climate of openness, honesty, transparency. That’s true of our relationshipswith God or people. Notice that living in the light not a climate of perfection. We still sin, andwe need Jesus to purify us. But even that is out in the open, in the light. Weacknowledge our sin, rather than trying to hide it. In fact the next verse says:
1 John 1:8-9
If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and thetruth is not in us.
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and willforgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.This is part of living in the light too: I acknowledge my sin, my failures. If I claimto be without sin, I’m fooling myself—but certainly nobody else. I don’t pretendthat I’m perfect or have it all together. I am honest with myself, with you and withGod. I own up and come clean, and God forgives and purifies me, and we havefellowship. That’s living in the light.Relationships thrive in the light; they die in the darkness. Relationshipsthrive on honesty, openness, transparency, and trust. Just like living things needlight to thrive, your relationships need the light of honesty to thrive and be healthy.Relationships are built on trust and honesty. You’ll never be close tosomeone you don’t trust, someone who is not honest with you.
Our family watches “Survivor”—we enjoy the human dynamics.Sometimes, people have tried to win the game
be honest. But in this particular game, the remaining contestants have all decided to lie their wayto top. And biggest liar of all is John, who lies to everyone. To win onereward, John told everyone that his grandmother had died back home.Everyone let him win out of sympathy. He was lying—his grandmother isfine! He lies to the other players but swears on his dead grandmother’sgrave that he’s telling the truth. They believe him! I just want to jump intothe TV and scream, “He’s lying!”Thursday night, one of the players, Krista, made an interestingcomment. “We’re all lying. It’s how you play the game. You can’t trustanyone. It’s every man for himself. We’re not out here to make bestfriends. We’re out here to win a million bucks.”“We’re not out here to make best friends.” Everyone knows that you don’t makefriends by lying to them. Relationships thrive in a climate of honesty. How docreate a climate of honesty?
1. Build trust.
If you want to create a climate of honesty in your relationships you must build trust. People will only be honest if they feel safe. They must be able to trust

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