the news came at melike some sick jokeyou would playunpreparedthe news echoed around the bathroom wallsand nothing else was reali sobbed and screamedas you held me nakedas a weakness like no otherattacked my physical structurethe house was too smalloutside just too quietmy cries carried outand saw themselves to the doora timeless surrenderwhere the knowledge of your absence made me vomiti could control myself no longeras the flood of my eyesmomentarily subsidedi looked at the skyexpecting it to implode with my heartyou sent me a shooting starto remind me you had simplyreturned to the startthough comfort wasnt easythe drive was long and coldi remembered your needing eyeswishing to see you until you are oldthe streetlights were but a smudgefrom the oceans in my eyesthe memories like picturesthat wouldnt subsideit still didnt sink inas i saw you lying theremy sleeping little friendmy touch wouldnt stirdeathintheairmy breathit couldnt fix thisyour body wouldnt moveyou had left meas i had left youin the dark of the nightwe lay you to restyour face under the moonlightthiswas no testi held you rememberingfive years of our journeysbeaches, forests, walks in my purserollerblading, camping,car ridesof no worthi waitedand waitedfor you to make even a stirto wake from your slumber