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Vampires...?

Vampires...?

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Published by Ginny MacPherson
Here is the first two chapters of my book, plase don't steal it i worked really hard.

Alice has had a rough life. Her mother died, her father is a rapist,She lives with her aunt who she hates and a cousin who hits on her. Then out of no where an "escape" appears, an attractive guy takes her on a date to a great restaurant and thats where her horrible life takes a drastic turn in the wrong direction leading her into a world she never knew existed. A world of...Vampires...?


So yeah, I'm Ginny, i'm 15 and I'd love if you people could tell me what you think of my first 2 chapters. I know they're not that great but w/e
Here is the first two chapters of my book, plase don't steal it i worked really hard.

Alice has had a rough life. Her mother died, her father is a rapist,She lives with her aunt who she hates and a cousin who hits on her. Then out of no where an "escape" appears, an attractive guy takes her on a date to a great restaurant and thats where her horrible life takes a drastic turn in the wrong direction leading her into a world she never knew existed. A world of...Vampires...?


So yeah, I'm Ginny, i'm 15 and I'd love if you people could tell me what you think of my first 2 chapters. I know they're not that great but w/e

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Published by: Ginny MacPherson on Feb 11, 2010
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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04/27/2011

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Chapter 1My life started with a date.I was conceived during a rape from a guy my mother had known for maybe an hour.My mother was just walking home from a high school dance and she had met a guy thereand just wanted to have a bit of fun but ended up raped.6 weeks later she noticed the morning sickness and the slight bulge in her stomach andwanted to abort me. Of course she didn’t or else I wouldn’t be telling you this, shesuddenly had a change of heart and left me in there, but her parents didn’t approve andkicked her out thinking she had sold her body on the street instead of the rape thatactually happenedThe day I was born was the day she died, you see she was only 14 and was verymalnourished and sickly from living on the streets so just moments after naming me shewent critical and died.
Alice Nerea Amaia.
She must have thought up that name in a moment. In basic translation it means ‘Noblemine end”I guess she thought I should have a noble end unlike hers.And I guess I should tell you too, mine was not a noble end, I died on a date just like her.The dark, cold air closed around me like an icy blanket. My thin black dress seemed tomove on its own. All I could think about was the fact that even though it was cold Iwasn’t cold alone.Beside me was the Beautiful young guy who had invited me on this chilly date to therestaurant of his choice.
 Tristan Balford 
He had brought me roses for the past week and left me messages on my phone everyday.His sweet voices had filled my every moment for the past week and now were on a date!
 
Tristan’s movement caught my attention; his soft white hand reached for mine and heldon tight once they met. He was so cold so I knew I wasn’t the only one suffering from thecold night air.“Alice, do you think we could go some where more…private?”Tristan’s eyes shone with a ghostly glow behind the soft brown.“Of course Tristan” I answered as I led him to the back of the restaurant to grab my jacket.As I entered the coat room to get my coat a soft haze filled my vision, blurring the edgesof the room.Stumbling like I was drunk, I left the room coatless and afraid.
Was this what happened to my mother? Drugged and knocked up?
My fears we dissipated as Tristan grabbed my arm and dragged me out the back muttering curses about “Stinking mortals” and “needy peasants”. Confusing me further he led me to his car, a sleek black car with tinted windows.Almost throwing me into the car, Tristan jumped into the drivers’ side and started todrive with me halfway out the car window throwing up my recent dinner.The sleek cars movements ceased as we drove up to my apartment building where I had been living with my Aunt and cousin, who both had conveniently left for the next twoweeks on vacation.“Hold on foolish mortal, hold on for your life.” Tristan said as he picked my up off thefront seat and slung me over his shoulder.Bitter, cold air sped past me before I met the warmth of my bedroom.I knew I should be worried but I just couldn’t be because I just felt so good. Better thanI’d felt in a long time.Tristan’s long white arms loosened and I fell onto my bed. His eyes looked hungry for something I had told him I wouldn’t give, “Tristan I said I didn’t want to do this
I saidas he leaned down, his shirt open.
I don’t want to be like me mom! Please don’t rape me!
.The ghostly glow behind his eyes became brighter,” Don’t worry sugar, it’ll only hurt for a moment, just relax and you won’t get hurt.”
 
Even with my resistance he kept leaning in closer and closer until his face was right infront of mine. “Sorry ‘bout this love but I am really hungry.” His American accentdisappeared into a sweet British one.Before I could ask any questions about how his hunger had to do with raping me, hismouth started sucking on my neck giving me what I was sure was going to be a major hickey. His tongue swirled little circles down my neck until he was right over my jugular,a scrape of teeth across my skin and a sharp pain was all I felt until the instant bliss.You know when you drink something hot on a really cold day and you get that tinglyfeeling down your back. Well it was like that feeling all over pulsating from my neck.His hands seemed to melt into my skin until all I could feel was the hot hungry mouth onmy neck, giving me this glorious feeling.Eventually the feeling started to fade and I started to feel pain instead of pleasure, a burning pain like fire in my veins.Suddenly everything stopped and a brilliant darkness overcame everything that still was.It was like ice water was being poured into my heart and radiating to the rest of my bodyuntil I was a block of ice.Chapter 2Facets of light overwhelmed me as I opened my eyes, the room I was in looked familiar  but completely alien. The lime green walls were vibrant and almost glowed in the earlymorning light. But the thing I noticed the most was the
 smell 
. Sweet like honey but sharplike an apple. Following the scent I turned around and saw it,
blood,
all over my bed, itwas soaked in blood.Springing up from the mattress I landed on my feet in a feral position. Footsteps outsidethe door startled me, the smell out there was like burned toast and strong tea. Icky.Opening the door slowly and peeking out I saw what I thought to be a woman, about 30years old and a young man who stood next to her, helping her unpack food. The manturned and I recognized the face, Toby. Toby, my cousin and Martha my aunt.The confusion of thoughts muddled my brain and I leapt out the nearest window,crashing down to the pavement outside. The concrete shattered beneath my feet, spider webbed out from my feet.

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