Santa, I need you to do me a huge favor. Can you please take your name off your phone? The boysand girls went through my phone, and may be calling you. Take your name off your phone. Just haveit as a number on the voicemail. You got to do this for me.Ho, ho, ho«ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho? Exactly, how many is that?
Christmas-ish 2009We hope this card finds you and yours in good spirits. 2009 has been a great year for us. Everyoneis healthy and happy, our bank didn·t fail, and we got to see a Seinfeld reunion on Curb YourEnthusiasm. We are truly blessed.As someone never said, TV is the window to the soul. If that is the case then the soul for ourfamily would be Gilligan·s Island and we would be its castaways. Although only 68 episodes aired, Ithink I·ve seen every one about 6-8 times. I think of it as my contribution to maintaining popularculture as a modern form of performance art. Like a good soldier, I fell on the grenade so thatothers may live.Anyway, on to our family and Gilligan·s Island. Megan (16) would be somewhere between theProfessor and Ginger. Like the Professor, she·s always figuring out new things for our family to do,and planning how things will generally go. For example, she produced this Christmakwanzakah card.I guess that means I executive produced it, i.e., wrote the checks and did what I was told. Verylittle gets by without input/edict/mandate by the Professor. She·s also like Ginger, well, becauseshe·s Ginger. She lives the life of a modern day, 16 year-old Brooke Astor. Last summer, she was inNYC (twice), Nantucket, Hawaii, Hamptons, and LA. Next summer, she hopes to get to travel a bitand not stay home as much. She is a sophomore at the Menlo School, and actively involved with theschool paper, bridge club, student council, lacrosse, golf, and endless Facebooking. She isapparently very busy because I·m often told that I don·t even understand how busy she is. Since Idon·t understand it, I can only take her word (edict). Almost 450 days have passed since my firstFacebook friend request, and still nothing. Crickets. You·d think I might rate as one of her 784closest friends, but apparently not. I·m hopeful that by the time she passes a couple of thousand,I·ll be among the chosen. I said I·d go down in flames trying to get friended by Megan, and rightnow, my butt·s on fire. I·m telling you right now that if our dog·s personal trainer (an issue for alater time) makes it in before I do, I·m suspending her driving privileges. By the way, she·s starteddriving. I guess that means she·ll be busier than I can even understand in other places.Back to our island, Peter (12) would be that Japanese sailor who sneaks onto the island in a WWIIsub. No one really sees him come, and no one sees him go. If you can·t find him, he·s likely sittingupstairs playing Xbox Live screaming into a headset to his friends that are equally addicted tovideogames. (When he gets a kill, the lyrics ´na na na, hey, hey, goodbyeµ can often be heard