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Forgive, Love, Forgive Again

Forgive, Love, Forgive Again



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Published by Cathi Gaughan
A brief guide to how to help your mind get free of the problems conflicts/arguments etc., can bring. Enjoy. Cathi
A brief guide to how to help your mind get free of the problems conflicts/arguments etc., can bring. Enjoy. Cathi

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Published by: Cathi Gaughan on Mar 25, 2010
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial


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Everyone can sit and be an armchair philosopher. Anyone cangive advice. However, I have always found that the bestadvice I receive is always from people that have been in asituation, gone through it and come out the other side a betterperson for it. Then not only this but find they are stilltravelling to find more questions to be answered, and answersto be questioned. I recently read a thought provoking quoteeBelieve those who are seeking the truth, doubt those thathave found itf
Andre GideIn the past week I was in a situation that, to be honest, putmy mind in turmoil. I found my 11 year old daughter in asituation where she was receiving a rampaging verbal onslaughtfrom a 17 year old girl. As my hackles reached the sky, I putmyself physically between the two and after asking her tomove away, I was then confronted myself by this teenagerinches away from my face, screaming at me ewhy, what thef*&* are you going to do about it?f. If I am honest, myinitial reaction was that I wanted to floor her, but the otherhalf of me was busy in my head telling me that I had to becalm, collected and it would be better just to get myself and
my young daughter out of the situation. So I firmly and silentlyput my hand on the girls arm and moved her away from us,etold her, Idd heard enoughf then got into my car and droveoff.Later on that evening I realised how shaken I had been by thewhole incident. I kept on repeating it in my head like a shortviolent film on a loop. I felt content with the actions I hadtaken as they were controlled and placid. Yet in my head Iwas adding ewhat if I had . . e footage, which, and I am notproud of this, but did have many incredibly aggressive andangry adages, and the more time elapsed the worse theybecame.Slowly I could feel myself sinking, at which point I knew Idesperately needed advice so called to my partner (Rob). Asever, I got what I needed to hear. Rob just told me plain andsimply to forgive her, and, in my head, tell her I was sorry andI loved her, then to forgive myself, then to move on.What a simplistic piece of advice; but it is a very multi-faceted piece the points of which will lead anyone in a difficultmental situation such as arguments/fights/personal insult,basically anything confrontational to reach a better place intheir mind.
The first point that needs to be understood is that in anysituation in life we are either the sole or co-creators ofwhatever happens to us. Whether it be a good, bad orindifferent. Therefore the responsibility for all that occurs inour lives lays solidly and squarely on our own shoulders.Forgiveness can be an incredibly difficult thing to do as ouregos always get in the way. That little voice in our heads thatstates little sentences like:
why should I, say sorry
didndt start it
s all their fault
y bad mood is because they caused it
y tears are because he/she/they made me cryThis is just ego getting in the way. You are always the onewho decides what mood you are in, you can change any mood,that is, if you want to. Your ego just tries to blame everyoneelse.

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