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April 1, 2010 - The Canchor

April 1, 2010 - The Canchor

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Published by The Anchor
The Canchor - April 1, 2010
The Canchor - April 1, 2010

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Published by: The Anchor on Mar 30, 2010
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1
CANCHOR
April 1, 2010
 
2
CANCHOR
April 1, 2010
Contents
CANCHOR
Vol. 82, No. 23
 
2010
NEWS
The Canchor is student-run and published weekly during the academic year. Editorial decisions for The Canchor are made by a majority vote of its student editorial board. No form of censorship will beimposed by the college. Any material found to be unsuitable or unacceptable in the board’s opinion will not be published. The views expressed in The Canchor, unless otherwise noted, are those of theindividual authors and do not necessarily represent those of The Canchor or of Rhode Island College’s faculty, administration or student body. The rst copy is free. Each additional copy is $2.25.Copyright © 2010 The Canchor. All rights reserved.
on the cover:
 Photograph by Hayden James for 
 
CANCHOR.
Sensual Message
 
 Aaron Buckley slathers Editor Andrew Augustus in soothing lotion. Photograph by Alexander Hoffman - Canchor 
So I herd u liek Mudkipz.
 
Canchor Layout Editor  Daniel Jordan heard about your interests. Photograph byMadeline Maloney.
Chilean EarthquakeKnocks Earth Off It’s Axis.
 
 How freakin’ crazy is that?SCIENCE!
LIFESTYLESPORTSARTS
Obama Declares CuteCat Videos Harmful to Ameri-can Economy.
Obama takes a stance against Internet Cats.
Gamer to Play for De-prived Gamers.
Gamer holds solo marathon for gamerseverywhere.
Gigantic Kitten FightsGodzilla in Times Square.
Twowalk in, one walks out in thisepic catght.
Chess Club Sabotagedby Average Joe.
Conspiracycomes of of old VP puts Clubin checkmate.
Soy un Perdedor.
 
So-cialists give our Raver a leg cramp.
How to Survive a Zom-bie Attack.
The Canchor’sown zombie tells you how to survive.
McDonald’s.
We reviewthe best of them all. Greasyburgers.
Spice Up Your Life.
 Have great sex by joining your local  BDSM scene.
Bermuda Triangle.
 Ever  feel like you just need todisappear for a while? Or  forever?
How to Raise Your Xenomorph.
 Because whodoesn’t want an alien who’ll have babies through your  stomach?
Justin Beiber’s My World2.0.
 
 Rob rates this album asWORST. ALMBUM. EVER.
RIC Mainstage ChangesShows Again. “
Chicago” and “Pippen” are exit stage left. In comes “Carousel.”
America the Beautiful.
 For those cheap and easydates, try Patriot Cinemas.
Rock Hunt and OSFSFestival Headline April Enter-tainment.
WXIN holds yearlyconcerts yet again.
Attack the Gas Station.
Contains: Chinese DeliveryGangsters. A must see for everyone.
The Bluffers.
 A silly car-toon you’ve probably never heard of.
Editor in Chief Takes thePlunge.
 Kam faces biggest challenge of his life in Costa Rica.
RIC Now Home to MidgetTossing Champion.
 
Seriously.We couldn’t make this shit up.
NFL Becomes NFFL.
The NFL goes for the ags.
March Madness Snips.
Vesectomies go up during big- gest basketball week.
2829303
New Fossil SolvesExtinction Mystery.
 Dinosaurswrapped it before they tapped it.
45678131617181921222424252731
 
3
CANCHOR
April 1, 2010
News
OBAMA AGAINST KITTENSNEW FOSSILSDEPRIVED GAMERSKITTEN VS GODZILLAAVERAGE JOE
Chilean Earthquake Knocks Earth Off Its Axis
An 8.8-magnitude earthquake in Chile killed over 790 people in February,
 but NASA tells
 
us that the
quake
 
also produced a greater global effect.The earthquake actually knocked the Earth slightly off of its gure axis – theaxis about which the Earth’s mass is balanced – by about three inches. The Earth’snorth-south axis was offset by about 33 feet. This caused, among other things,our days to become almost imperceptibly shorter by about 1.26 microseconds (microseconds being one millionth of a second).Earthquakes making this kind of global change is not a new concept, though. The 9.1-magnitude Indian Ocean earthquake in2004 generated a tsunami that killed hundreds of thousands is said to also have shifted the Earth’s axis by just under three inches, but likely shortened our days by 6.8 microseconds.Richard Gross, a JPL research scientist, developed the preliminary calculations on the effects of the Chilean earthquake witha group of fellow researchers. According to him, despite the higher magnitude of the 2004 earthquake, its effect on the Earth’srotation was smaller. Quake location and the angles and position of the faults responsible play a signicant role in how and towhat degree things are affected. Whereas the 2004 quake took place relatively near the equator, the Chilean earthquake took  place in the mid-latitudes, which gave it more power over the axis.The most powerful earthquake ever recorded (at magnitude 9.5) occurred in 1960. The quake was called the Valdivia earth-quake, named for the Chilean city that was the most affected.
– By Brian Walsh
   T  r  u   l  y   b  a   d  a  s  s  r  e  n   d   i   t   i  o  n  o   f   E  a  r   t   h   ’  s   i  n  e  v   i   t  a   b   l  e   d  e  s   t  r  u  c   t   i  o  n   i  n   2   0   1   2  c  o  u  r   t  e  s  y  o   f  z  a  s   t  a   k   i .  c  o  m .
World News:Kitten vs. Godzilla
page 7

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