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The G-spot Revisited

Published November 21st, 2008 by Betty Dodson

As far as I know, I have never had a G-spot orgasm nor have I ever ejaculated.
However, I do know many of my orgasms have been deep, powerful and
satisfying. I've also enjoyed those little ten minute maintenance orgasms that
release tension. There is no such thing as having a bad orgasm- they all put a
smile on my face. Maybe the vaginal orgasms that I managed to squeak out in
my twenties would classify as G's. Some were quite accidental and non-
repeatable. Others required a thirty minute erection owned by a handsome young
man who promised he'd only have sex with me. Oh yes, I had to get on top and
Ride ‘em Cowgirl, which wasn't easy in the fifties and early sixties. They called us
"ball busters" back then.

Okay, I'm aware that as a PhD sexologist, I'm not supposed to talk about my
personal sexlife. However, I love to break rules. Just think how informative it
would for all of us if more people shared details of their sexlives. In my personal
opinion when academics or researchers talk about sexuality, we often are
referring to our own experiences to one degree or another, consciously or
unconsciously. So let me say upfront that my bias (or favorite kind of orgasm) is
a combination of direct clitoral stimulation with vaginal penetration. Thanks to
America's sexual revolution, I discovered this combination worked best with most
people that I was fortunate enough to share sex with in the groupsex parties of
the sixties and seventies.

At the beginning of the eighties, a lot of weird things happened that ended the
sexual freedom many of us had enjoyed since the mid-sixties. Theories still
circulate as to what curtailed our sexual liberties. Some say it was the AIDS virus
that made sex equal death. Others claim it was a backlash over too much sexual
freedom for women. Feminists complained that the sexual revolution was for the
benefit of men, not women. All in all, I felt caught in the middle of a sexual
disaster that seemed to be master-minded by some secret government agency-
maybe the CIA.

As if things weren't bad enough, The G-Spot book by Ladas, Whipple and Perry
came out in '82 heralding the return of a new kind of orgasm from vaginal
stimulation that included female ejaculation. The book was full of glorious
personal testimonials one more ecstatic than the last. The three authors claimed
the G-spot freed us from thinking about vaginal vs. clitoral orgasm. Just like there
were two ways for men to climax, from the penis and the prostate gland; the
same was true for women. Well, I don't know about all men, but from experience
I do know that damn few will allow anyone near their precious assholes, let alone
inside them to vigorously stimulate a prostate. That's some advanced action for
most straight men.

Just when I thought the clitoris had been reinstated thanks to seventies feminists,
women and their lovers dived back inside vaginas searching for a magic spot.
Once it was found and briskly stimulated it would bring forth a "divine liquid" that
proved she'd come good and hard. To me, G-spot orgasms sounded suspiciously
like a new name for vaginal orgasms, still America's number one favorite sex. It's
no accident that fucking feels good- it was designed to encourage procreation.
However, there are numerous ways intercourse could include a woman's orgasm
by adding a little direct clitoral stimulation simultaneously.

First off, the G-spot is a terrible name, but we're stuck with it. My first hurdle was
locating a "spot." It was the size of a quarter upfront, no midway, or it moved
around. It helped when I visualized the urinary tract as a small tube an inch or so
long on the other side of the vaginal ceiling. Surrounding this tube is a spongy
tissue that fills up with blood during sexual arousal, Mother Nature's way to
protect the urinary tract from friction during intercourse. When a woman is new to
vaginal penetration or not thoroughly aroused (which is often the case) the
sensitive urinary track can become irritated causing discomfort or pain during
urination. This was called "Honeymoon Cystitis" but it's now referred to as a UTI
(urinary tract inflammation). G-spot sex soon became fashionable, and sex
partners of both genders began vigorously rubbing this protected area to "make"
their partners "squirt." Just one more thing a woman had to achieve.

First my orgasms had to be concealed as a kid so I pulled a pillow up tight


between my legs. Then I learned to get good feelings from my fingers on my
clitoris. In high school, I socialized my orgasms when I came from my boyfriend's
fingers. Next I struggled throughout my twenties into my thirties to orgasm from
vaginal intercourse. This worked sometimes, but never consistently. Purists only
allowed clitoral stimulation as foreplay. Coitus with vigorous penile thrusting
inside a vagina was the real orgasm that most often turned out to be his and not
mine. Oralsex was a winner but I worried about taking too long so I frequently
stopped short of coming. Multiple orgasms were easy once I began using a
vibrator and learned to keep going. Now I'm expected to orgasm and "ejaculate"
from G-spot stimulation which doesn't work for me at all. This sexual "achieving"
business is enough to make a woman abandon heterosexuality altogether!

When I read that every woman had a G-spot, but not all of us would respond, I
naturally wondered why. The authors said it might be because my PC muscle
was weak or chronically tense. Or wearing a diaphragm all those years had
covered "my spot." Perhaps I repressed my ejaculations thinking it was urine.
Maybe I had retrograde ejaculations that I peed out later. As I continued to read
all those glowing accounts from women and men about ecstatic gushing rushing
orgasms from vaginal stimulation, it made me and a lot of other women feel like
inadequate clit nerds.
Throughout the eighties, I asked women friend's hundreds of questions,
especially those who were performance artists that squirted publicly. Several
demonstrated female ejaculation for me privately. I even participated in an actual
dissection of the clitoris which brought up more questions than it solved. Finally I
arrived at the following conclusion. Since the female sex organ is the template for
the male organ, we must have everything the male embryo needs to develop. All
vaginas are naturally acidic to kill off unwanted bacteria. The prostate gland in
men secretes an alkaline fluid discharged with the sperm to protect the little guys
as they wiggle through the acidic sea of the vaginal canal. I could see how a
small amount of the same alkaline fluid discharged by a woman could also help
to protect sperm. The G-spot had to be the female prostate but I still wasn't sure
where it was located or, what it looked like.

The clitoral body is a far more extensive organ than most realize. That little pearl
peeking out from under the hood at the top of the vulva is just the tip of the
iceberg. Besides the clitoral glans and shaft that's visible, the internal structure
consists of the clitoral legs, bulbs, and the urethral sponge. These interior parts
are erectile tissue that becomes engorged with blood during sexual arousal- like
a penis becoming erect. Women have nearly the same amount of erectile tissue
as men, except most of ours is internal.

Inside the vulva, the shaft of the clitoris divides into two parts that spread out like
a wishbone called the crura or legs of the clitoris. These two anchoring wingtips
of erectile tissue are about three inches long. Starting from where the shaft and
the legs meet and continuing down underneath the inner lips, are two bundles of
erectile tissue called the bulbs of the clitoris. The entire clitoris consists of the
glans, hood, shaft, legs, and vestibular bulbs- organs solely for a woman's sexual
pleasure. The feminist collective that wrote, A New View of a Woman's Body,
included the inner lips, the urethral sponge and perineal sponge as part of the
clitoral body because they all engorge during sexual arousal and contribute to
sexual pleasure.

The first person to describe the female prostate in detail was a seventeenth
century Dutch anatomist de Graaf who also considered its erotic aspects. In late
1800's Dr. Skene was concerned with draining the various glands surrounding
the female urethra when infected. In 1950, Dr. Grafenberg (the "G" in G-Spot)
noted that some women emitted fluid during orgasm that he believed came from
Skene's urethral glands. In 1981, A New View of a Woman's Body called the
spongy tissue surrounding the female urinary tract the "urethral sponge" when
they discovered it wasn't named in anatomy books. The urethral sponge had a
network of tiny ducts called the "paraurethral glands" that were the source of
female ejaculation.

By the nineties, G-spot orgasms and female ejaculation were all the rage. This
was good news for women who had repressed their orgasms thinking they were
urinating. However, it was difficult for those of us who didn't have this response.
Naturally we felt like we were missing out on something special. Yes, I believe
there are women who naturally have this response. With each contraction of the
pelvic floor muscles during orgasm, a fine spray comes out of the urethral
opening without consciously bearing down. Most assume the word "ejaculation"
accompanies sexual arousal and orgasm. This is not true for all ejaculating
women. Many of my friends say their ability to "squirt" has nothing to do with
having an orgasm. They do it because it feels good; it's fun, and squirting has an
enormous amount of entertainment value.

Female fluid emission has been recorded throughout history. However, as in


most erotic literature or personal testimony, it gets described in exaggerated
glowing terms called "poetic license." Add to that the fact that during the last two
decades, goddesses forbid any person, especially a woman, doubted another
woman's anecdotal testimony. If you did, you were accused of being anti-feminist
or anti-woman.

Teachers of female ejaculation completely contradict the description of how to


strengthen the pelvic floor muscle. They instruct students to bear down or push
out during masturbation. Kegel exercises were named after Dr. Arnold Kegel who
wanted an alternative to surgery for his incontinent women patients. He had them
toning the pelvic floor muscles by repeatedly squeezing while lifting up and then
releasing the muscle. Women who consistently bear down to urinate, ejaculate,
have a bowel movement or have multiple births weaken the muscles if they don't
also lift up while consciously exercising the pelvic floor muscles.

A client who was postmenopausal said she and her boyfriend learned about G-
spot stimulation at a workshop. Although Louise wasn't sure if she'd ever had an
orgasm, she could "ejaculate." To get her lover to stop rubbing inside her vagina
when it became painful, she arched her back and shot out a stream of pee that
was accompanied by a blood-curdling scream. Although he was thrilled she kept
thinking there had to be more to orgasm. During our session, we discovered her
PC muscle was quite weak. It will take months of practice to retrain her pelvic
floor muscles to lift up. She also needs to become aware of how she uses the
same muscles during sexual activity. She left with the Magic Wand, my Vaginal
Barbell and directions on how to practice her Kegels while doing clitoral
stimulation at the same time so the exercise was fun.

The Internet is full of home and adult videos showing women shooting streams of
fluid claiming it to be female ejaculation. Many women insist these new squirting
orgasms are the cat's meow. Questioners visiting my website continue to ask
how to find the G-spot, but occasionally a woman wants to stop lying in a wet
puddle. One twenty-year old woman said that when she's vibrating her clitoris
warming up and feeling pretty good, she looses control of her bladder and pees.
A few minutes later she'll have an orgasm. She doesn't mind this too much as
her orgasms are well worth it, but what happens when she's with a lover? How
does she go about alleviating this problem? I reminded her that "squirting" was
the latest fashion in female orgasm. All she had to do was find a boyfriend who
loved it. She could also see if her PC muscle was weak. If so, she needed to do
her Kegel exercises regularly.

In the mid-nineties, Dr. Gary Schubach, did a clinical experiment to determine


whether female ejaculation came from the urethral sponge or the bladder. He
tested seven subjects who were all female ejaculators. Urine specimens were
collected from each woman before she was sexually aroused. The women used
self-stimulation of the vagina with fingers, a curved dildo and a partner's fingers.
When the subjects felt ready to ejaculate, a catheter was inserted. They had
what each woman and the medical team considered to be an "ejaculatory
orgasm." They concluded that the vast majority of fluid came from the bladder.
Even though all bladders had been drained beforehand, they still expelled from
1.7 ounce to nearly four cups. It was determined that the liquid was a
combination of fluid from the walls of the bladder as well as new kidney output:
an altered form of urine with a reduced concentration of urea and creatinine.

Whenever I'd see Beverly Whipple at a sex conference, I'd say, "I can't find my
G-spot but I'm still looking." She would laugh and then shake her head in
exasperation. She's a very dedicated woman who always has a hundred projects
going on at once. In '98 Beverly chaired a panel I was on at the Society for the
Scientific Study of Sexuality. I began my segment by telling everyone that I had
finally found my G-spot: it was inside my urethral sponge that surrounded the
urinary tract on the other side of the ceiling of my vagina. While I enjoyed some
pressure there with a finger, dildo or penis, I'd never "ejaculated." My spot was a
vibrator on my clitoris along with vaginal penetration at the same time.

In 2001 a friend forwarded an email exchange between sex therapists discussing


a case where clitoral stimulation induced urination. Dr. John Perry, one of the
authors of The G-Spot book pointed out the current hot topic in female
ejaculation is whether large-volume expulsions of fluid, usually considered to be,
or examined and determined to be, dilute urine, should be included as a variant
of female ejaculation. Women who learn how to do this claimed it felt wonderful.
The original G-Spot authors agreed that only the output of the female
paraurethral glands (prostate equivalent), should be considered female
ejaculation and that's never more than a couple of teaspoons full at most.

When I emailed Perry to ask a few questions of my own, he said, "The reason
you don't ejaculate is when you do Kegels, you're always lifting up. If for some
reason you WANT to ejaculate, you have to change the ‘lifting up' to ‘pushing
out.' But don't do it if you won't be able to go back to your original pattern!" He
went on to say that he personally didn't care for female ejaculation, mostly
because he didn't like sleeping on the wet spot. I can't imagine anyone who
would like it.
My friend Becky Chalker, author of the Clitoral Truth and one of the editors for, A
New View of a Woman's Body, recently said the following: "All orgasms are
clitoral in that they are stimulated through the ‘pudendal' nerve (Latin for
shameful). The pudendal nerve should be called the ‘clitoral' nerve. People have
tried to designate orgasms as clitoral, vaginal, g-spot or uterine, but they are ALL
clitoral. The G-spot is not a structure and can only be located by sensation. The
female prostatic glands are located inside the urethral sponge, a tube of spongy
tissue surrounding the female urethra. The male urethra is surrounded by the
same type of erectile tissue named the spongyosum which means spongy body."

Becky went on to state, "In the 1980's book, Whipple et al said the G-spot is on
the anterior front wall of the vagina. More recent research done by Zaviacic, says
only 10% of women have it there. 66% have their sensitivity further back so they
can be stimulated toward the back of the vaginal ceiling. Paco Cabello's research
showed that women who do not ejaculate externally have "retrograde"
ejaculations, which he proved by demonstrating they had higher levels of
prostatic fluids in their post-orgasmic voiding compared with pre-orgasmic urine
concentrations."

I've called the G-spot the back side of the clitoris, the urethral sponge or the
female prostate gland. It seems this last label finally won in scientific circles. The
International Committee on Anatomical Terminology concurred at their 2001
meeting to the use of the term "female prostate" (prostata feminina) in the new
edition of Histology Terminology.

In 2005, I also got to know Alice Ladas one of the other authors of The G-Spot
book. She wanted her chapter to open the book to make the point, "The best is
the enemy of the good." A warning to avoid presenting this information in a way
that would make a woman who did not respond to this type of stimulation feel
inferior. Sadly her chapter was put at the end of the book. The publisher probably
figured showcasing a new kind of orgasm would sell more books.

In 2007 I was in Seattle where I met a woman who did what she called "Vaginal
Mapping." As a member of a sex club, she had mapped over five hundred
women's vaginas. Intrigued, I asked to be done. Using an acrylic see-through
speculum with a slot open to expose the top of the vagina, she could see my G-
spot. I asked since it was on the other side of the vaginal ceiling, how she could
see anything. Her explanation described the urethral sponge like a bulge
underneath wall paper. This is just part of her report:

"The presentation of your outer genitalia with the lovely ‘wattles' is something to
be proud of! You have a very large healthy clitoral hood, shaft and glans. The
responses were all positive when touched. Your urethral opening looks healthy,
but I saw no visible openings for Bartholin's or Skeen's glands. The results of
your Kegel exercises made a huge impression on me! Thank you for the FIRM
handshake. After inserting the PPV to view inside, your G-Spot was encased in
scar tissue due to past events with surgery, a new discovery for me. Upon
stimulation it expanded to almost twice its size, and responded with coloration
and lubrication appropriate to its size."

What wonderful feedback. The G-spot authors can add scar tissue from
abortions performed before the use of suction with plastic tubes. We now have
the morning after pill that I've heard is the best yet. Meanwhile I will continue to
be the voice for women who do not respond to G-spot stimulation and do not
ejaculate- for a multitude of reasons and have no desire to learn. I support any
woman who wants to have her G-spot orgasms and squirt. We are all free to do
anything that turns us on as long as it's consensual and doesn't harm anyone.
Each of us can find our own hot spots and enjoy the orgasms they give us alone
and with our partners.

The big topic today more popular than the female prostate is "female sexual
dysfunction." Many sex therapists and educators agree that there is nothing
wrong with women's sexuality; it's the cultural definition of how men and women
should have sex that's the problem. As long as we expect women to be satisfied
with vaginal stimulation alone and men believe women should orgasm that way,
couples will remain at odds and the sexual double standard will remain intact.
Men climax from stimulating the head and shaft of the penis, sensations that are
easily duplicated inside a warm moist vagina during intercourse. Most women
prefer some kind of direct contact with the clitoral glans that is analogous to the
penile glans. In spite of those experts who tell us about certain positions that will
aid women's orgasm during intercourse, what feels good for him simply doesn't
work for her most of the time.

My conclusion is that how we stimulate our clitoris during masturbation is what


we are entitled to bring into partnersex. Even those women who have vaginal
orgasms are responding to some form of indirect clitoral stimulation from the
aroused internal bulbs and legs of the clitoris. Once again, nearly forty years
later, it's time to restore the clitoris as a woman's primary organ of sexual
pleasure. Until women can appreciate the appearance of their vulvas and
embrace the power that's inherent in their magnificent sex organ, there will no
women's sexual liberation. Most of us will agree that without sexual freedom
there can be no self. Orgasmic women unite!

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