"I thought you were going

to wash your hair?" He ran his

fingers through it. "I thought
you liked my messy hair?" I
shot back at him. He raised his
eyebrow. I raised both my
eyebrows and bit my bottom
lip. He laughed.
"Gah, I'll go wash it." I
untangled myself from his
arms and got out of bed.
"You dont have to, I was
just wondering. Hey, Sam and
Emm invited us over for lunch,
you wanna go?"
"Yeah, sure. That would be
great." I hadn't seen the pack
in a while, I missed them.
"Okay cool, Ill wait here while
you get ready." I kissed his
cheek before I left the room, it
seemed like we both were
comfortable with it now. When
I got to the bathroom I tried to
brush out the tangled chaos
before I got in the shower so it
would be easyer, but it didnt
work. It was actualy useless.
 I stayed in the shower
longer than I had planned, but
it gave me time to think.
Everything was perfect, life
was back to normal. Not to
mention me jumping of that
stupid clift three days ago. If it
wasnt for Jake, I would be at
the bottom of the ocean
somewere. That was the night
of our first kiss. I wasn't sure I
was ready for it yet, but I knew
it was going to happen. I
figured if I was going to keep
on loving Jake and that Edward
wasnt coming back, why not?.
Steam was surrounding
me. I had been in the shower
long enough. I really didnt feel
like blowdrying my hair so I
just towel dried it and got
dressed. I walked back to my
room and found Jacob looking
at the scrapbook I had tried to
put together. He looked at the
page with a subheading, but
no picture. He just stared at it.
I walked forward and he
slamed the book when he
noticed me. I acted like I never
noticed. He walked over to sit
in the old rocking chair in the
corner. I put my toilitries in the
closet and shut the door. Jacob
just watched me silently. I
Leaned aginst the foot of the
bed infront of him. "What are
you thinking about?" He
sighed.
"I dont see how you do it."
"Do what?"
"How you go on every day
like your'e not affected. Like
you are happy. But when I
leave you alone you break
down. I dont understand. How
do you act happy when I know
your'e not. Why do you try?"
"Jake, I am happy most of
the time. I'm always happy
when I'm with you. When I'm
alone it just gives me time to
think, thats all. Jacob, you
make me so much better that I
use to be. Every little thing use
to remind me of him, and I
would have a mental
breakdown. But now it's not as
bad. I miss him, but not as
much as I love you." Jacobs
eyes grew soft, loving, caring.
"Bella, you don't have to
pretend for me."
I wasn't pretending! I
loved him! Could he not see
that? I mean of corse I'm going
to have my moments were I
miss Edward but Jacob could
provide so much more for me!
The truth stung a little bit but I
knew it was true. It was time
to change compleatly. If I was
going to love Jacob, I was
going to have to do it full
heartedly. No half-crack job.
No jokes. Just me and Jacob. I
knew what I was going to have
to do. Forget him compleatly,
or try my hardest to.
"Jacob Black, I am NOT
pretending for you. If I didnt
love you as much as I did I
would have told you earlyer,
before all this happened. But I
love you. With everything
inside me! Do you not
understand, Jacob? I would
never do that to you, I love
you."
His face was stunned.
That was probly not the
reaction he expected. There
was no way on earth that I was
ever going to let him feel let
down. And I was NEVER going
to let him think hes not good
enough for me. He was so
much better that me and
more. I didn't deserve him.
"Come here," He motioned
for me to come sit in his lap,
and of corse I did. "Bella, I
beleve you. But I don't want
you to hurt. It kills me inside to
watch you in pain, and I want
that to stop. You are my life,
Bella! And I dont want you to
be in pain because of that
filthy bloodsucker! He was not
good for you! He could have
hurt you, but Bella, I will never
hurt you!" His body was
trembling. He closed his eyes
and inhaled through his nose.
The trembling calmed down as
fast as it came. Placing on of
my hands on his face I sighed.
I didnt want him to be upset.
Mabie I was the one causing
him pain. With his eyes still
closed he breathed in and out
steadily. It seemed like we sat
like this for hours.
Jacob finaly opened his
eyes, "Are you ready to go?"
"Um, yeah. Just give me a
minute to change clothes."
He sat me on my feet and
didn't say anything as he left
the room, closing the door
behind him. I thought about
the futer, how this would turn
out in the end. Mabie Jacob
was better for me. I put on the
red blouse draped over the
rocking chair, followed with my
jean shorts. Befrore I left my
room I grabbed my keys off my
dresser, slinging my door
open. Just as I started to walk
forward I bounded rigth into
Jacob. I had to admit, it was
kinda like running smack dab
into a brick wall. He caught me
right as I was about to fall. His
lips were pressed in a tight
line, he was trying his hardest
not to laugh. It didn't work for
long. His booming voice filled
the house as he rocked with
laughter. I couldn't help but to
laugh with him.
"Well hello ther!" He was
still rocking with laughter as he
greeted me. I took a deep
breath to calm me down, he
did the same.
"Im so sorry, I'm a clutz."
"I don't mind." He said
with a huge grin. "So are you
ready?"
"Yeah I'm ready, I guess
we can take the truck since
you walked hear..... I'll drive."
His driving sorta scared me
too. But he didn't go as fast as
Edward, I didn't know how
much more torture my little
truck could take. He was a
senior citizen.
"Okay that's fine. Should I
help you to your car since
your'e equilibrium is a little low
today, or can you take the
chance of walking?"
"I think I can manage."

The trip was a little quiet,

other than Jacob giving me
directions because I wasn't
entirly use to the location. Jake
sometimes randomly whisled
or yawned. He sometimes
sang a little if I was lucky. That
boy could sing. He was so easy
going. I could see some more
of my old Jacob.
When we pulled up at the
Uley's, the pack was setting on
the poarch. Paul howled as we
walked up to them hand in
hand. Jake smiled.
"Hey, hey!" Embry
extendet his fist out to him.
Jake returned the fist bump.
"How's it going my
brotha'?"
"Aw, I'm pretty great."
 Embry nodded his head
towards me, "Bella." I just
smiled at him in return. Jared
didn't look to happy. He was
sitting with his legs hangin
over the side of the poarch.
"Burrrrrnnnn!" Paul yelled
at Jared. "Looks like I get my
five dollars!" He shoved Jared
off the side he was sitting. His
growl echoed the forest. Paul
jumped back and forth with his
fists infront of his face like a
boxer getting ready for his first
match. He punched the air
some.
"Watcha' gunna' do pup?"
He punched the air once more.
Jared stood up to face Paul,
snarling.
"Nock it off, guys."
Authority fumed from Sam's
voice. They both relaxed, Jared
just mock punched Paul on the
sholder. Jacob laughed.
I was so confused. "What
just happened?" Jacob
explained to me, "Paul and
Jared just made a bet that I
spent the night with you, and
obviously, Paul won." He
grinned down at me. I just
giggled in return.
"Okay guys, I have some
news." Everything grew
serious. "The redhead has
made a new path to the North.
She just keeps going back and
forth, trying to find a crack in
our defence. But we can't let
that happen. Tonight we will
pair up in groups, she got to
close the other night and we
cant let that happen again.
Jared, you and Embry will take
the North trail. Paul and I will
take the oposite direction.
Jacob you stay here with Emily
and Bella. Bella do you think
you can talk your dad into
letting you stay over here
tonight?"
"I'm sure he want mind."
"Okay thats great, it's
settled. Lets eat."
Everyone filed in the
kitchen as fast as they could. I
wasn't realy that hungry
because I was thinking about
Victoria. The thougt of her had
me petrified. Jacob pulled me
behind him as he went to sit
down. All I got was a peice of
banana bread. Jacob gave me
a woried glance. He didn't like
it when I didn't eat. That only
ment one thing to him, I was
scared. The bloode was still
gone from my face, I could feel
it. That woried glance grew
into one of disapproval. I just
shook my head at him.
Victoria was bound to get
me. I could se her vicious,
blood curdling smile. And her
reched crimson eyes. A shiver
went down my spine. Jacob
shook his head in
disapointment. I knew he
thought I should have more
faith in the pack, but I was
scared for them. I knew what
she was capable of.
"So Bella, did ya' have fun
last night?" Paul wagged his
eyebrows at me as he asked
the question. Jared slumped
his head into his hands. My
cheeks were burning, I looked
down at the tabel.
"And how is this any of
your buisness?" Jake shot back
at him, his dark eyes teasing.
"Well I was just curious."
"Nothing happened, I just
stayed over." Paul looked
disapointed.
"Thats sad, Jake. If I had a
girl and I stayed the night at
her house I would-
"Hey, at least I have a
girl!"
"Shut up!"
"Hey man, it's the truth."
"Did you even sleep in the
same bed?!"
"Yeah," My cheeks grew
even hotter.
"That's my boy." He
extended his fist out to Jakes
for a fist bump. I just layed my
head in my hands. They all
laughed at my reaction. Jake
rubbed my back in reasuring
circles.

~~*~~

Jake drove me back home

to get my stuff. I called
Charlie to tell him that Sam
was going to be out so I was
staying with Emily. He said it
was fine with him.
Jake watched me as I
gathered my stuff. His eyes
followed me where ever I
went. Finaly he spoke.
"What are you thinking
about?"
"Actualy, I was thinking
about tonight."
He laughed. "Yeah that's
going to be interesting, I get to
baby sit!" He came and stood
infront of me.
"Well I rely would'nt
consider it baby sitting." His
arms snaked around my
waste.
"Oh, it has it's benifits."
He kissed me on the head.
"So.... You guna' start
baby sitting as a full time job?"
"Sounds like a plan to
me." He murmmered, pressing
his lips againts mine. It wasn't
rely the passionate kiss I was
looking for but it was good
enough.
"Okay," I murmmered
agints his lips pushing away.
"Lets go to stinking sleepover."

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