heirs is a Satanist civics.They will sell their souls inthe belief that governmentcan heal the sick, raise the dead, makethe old feel young, and make theyoung go out and vote.They hate our freedom. The part of our freedom that they hate the most isour free market capitalism. But capital-ism is one of the most important in- ventions in human history. If it weren’tfor debt and equity, all of the innova-tors, manufacturers, and businessmenwho have brought prosperity to thefree world would have to get theirmoney the way the rest of us do—by asking their wives.So the worshipers of big govern-ment are back with their lies and theirempty promises. And what do we doabout it? I don’t know. I’m too stupidto answer that question.But in fairness to myself, I’m not just stupid. I am a student of stupidity.I am a political reporter.It occurs to me that America couldwind up with a Democratic president.This scares me. Not because I hate De-mocrats—although I do, come to thinkof it—but because a strong Democraticpresident and a strong DemocraticCongress could put an end to partisanbickering in Washington and result inpoliticians from both parties workingtogether to solve America’s problems. And then we’re really screwed.I have been covering politics for 38years. Trust me: we don’t want politicsto quit. That’s why we need a Republi-can president—not because Republi-cans are good but because we needgridlock. I love gridlock. Gridlockmeans government can’t do things.The two most frightening words inWashington are “bipartisan consen-sus.” Bipartisan consensus is when my doctor and my lawyer agree with my wife that I need help.Bipartisan consensus—like thestimulus package that has been deliv-ered to us courtesy of Congress and thepresident. A $168 billion stimuluspackage that is supposed to change thetrajectory of a $13 trillion economy.Now, even somebody who flunkedhigh school physics—and I did—can tell you that the energy of $168billion is not sufficient to budge $13trillion worth of inertia. It’s like tryingto use Dennis Kucinich to pushHillary Clinton off the Democraticcampaign platform.We
wind up with a Democrat-ic president. We
wind up with a Democratic Congress. Now, I am a Republican. I’m a rotten Republicanquite a lot of the time, but a Republi-can nonetheless. And as a Republican,I’ve got to say that the 2006midterm elections made me very upset at the Republicans. Imean, Jack Abramoff, Bob Ney,Randy “Duke” Cunningham,Tom DeLay, Mark Foley. Theelectorate was almost too nau-seated to make it to the polls to vote Democratic.It took a Democratic major-ity in the House of Representatives 40years—from 1954 to 1994—to get thatcorrupt and arrogant, and the Republi-cans did it in just 12. And people say that we Republicans don’t have a loton the ball. The Republicans thoughtthey had the House of Representativesso well redistricted that the only places
If you’re electing Democratsto control governmentspending, then you’re mar-rying Angelina Jolie for herbrains.