The Accent on

Englishness

Originally posted at Graham Carter’s website( http://www.grahamcarter.net)

What is the American female's perception of the Englishmale? Ask almost any American female with a pulse what shethinks is the most attractive accent a man can have, and youwill invariably hear "English."This, with a sudden fluttering of the hand as the female inquestion fans herself while imagining the iconic soppingwetness of Colin Firth, the impish grin of Jude Law, thebumbling charm of Hugh Grant, the sultry tones of OrlandoBloom, the tortured stares of Matthew MacFadyen, the geekyenthusiasm of David Tennant (oops, Scottish!), theincredulous exclamations of Jack Davenport, the blue-eyedwonder of James McAvoy (OK, so he's Scottish, too)…You will also hear that, despite the running joke of badteeth, the accent trumps everything. The man can lack socialgrace, any sense of style, and possibly not know how to groomhimself. Yet, once he opens that mouth of his and speaks thewoman's name with his clipped, slightly ironic accent (for allEnglishmen sound moderately amused by some recent irony),he has her adoring attention for the next ten minutes, at least.(All right, I'll admit I'm one of the aforementioned ladies,though I temper my attraction, I hope, with the realization thatthe accent is not

everything

. Just

mostly

everything.)

Why is this the case, you ask? I reply with anotherquestion: How many American men, that you know of, use amulti-syllabic word to express surprised pleasure? Examplesinclude "brilliant", "excellent", and "terrific". I can't name one,and I've been surrounded by them my entire life.There is something about the English accent which makesan American female swoon, both because of its novelty, andthe assumption that all English men are highly intelligent (seeabove, with the multi-syllabic expressions of pleasure). It isassumed that all Englishmen are impressively literate, havingread at least one Shakespearean play and—pay attention, thisis important—

understood

it. An Englishman drinks tea, anddoes not worry whether this is masculine or not (a personalattraction of mine).Additionally, all Englishmen must be gentlemen, becausethey are all viscounts, earls, and, if you're very lucky, dukes,in disguise. Or at least related to one. He will always get thedoor for you, hold your umbrella when it rains, offer to dancewith you in a manner that doesn't bring lewd acts to mind,and greet your mother politely and congenially, thus ensuringher opinion that he is perfect. Because the fact of the matter is,thanks to the English accent, American women assume the