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Hope Will Find You by Naomi Levy - Ch. 31 Excerpt

Hope Will Find You by Naomi Levy - Ch. 31 Excerpt

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How can I get my life off hold? When will my life really begin?

We all ask ourselves the same questions when we are struggling to move forward. As a rabbi, Naomi Levy frequently offered spiritual guidance to people seeking the answers. But when a doctor told her that her young daughter, Noa, had a fatal degenerative disease, Rabbi Levy’s own insights could not prevent her whole life from unraveling.

In Hope Will Find You, Naomi Levy shares her journey and the wisdom she gained. She describes with humor and honesty how she came through a time of uncertainty and fear and learned how to stop waiting for life to begin. A natural and engaging storyteller, Levy has written a book filled with invaluable lessons for living in the present and for opening the door to an extraordinary future.

Hope Will Find You is a book that will be passed to friends when life gets confusing, a book that will rest on our bedside tables when we are searching for hope and direction.

To learn more about Naomi Levy and Hope Will Find You please visit Crown Publishing Group at www.crownpublishing.com.
How can I get my life off hold? When will my life really begin?

We all ask ourselves the same questions when we are struggling to move forward. As a rabbi, Naomi Levy frequently offered spiritual guidance to people seeking the answers. But when a doctor told her that her young daughter, Noa, had a fatal degenerative disease, Rabbi Levy’s own insights could not prevent her whole life from unraveling.

In Hope Will Find You, Naomi Levy shares her journey and the wisdom she gained. She describes with humor and honesty how she came through a time of uncertainty and fear and learned how to stop waiting for life to begin. A natural and engaging storyteller, Levy has written a book filled with invaluable lessons for living in the present and for opening the door to an extraordinary future.

Hope Will Find You is a book that will be passed to friends when life gets confusing, a book that will rest on our bedside tables when we are searching for hope and direction.

To learn more about Naomi Levy and Hope Will Find You please visit Crown Publishing Group at www.crownpublishing.com.

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Publish date: Sep 21, 2010
Added to Scribd: Aug 05, 2010
Copyright:Traditional Copyright: All rights reserved

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10/27/2013

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121
E
ver since
Noa’s second-grade teacher approached me, mymood had taken a nosedive. Why was Noa having so muchtrouble learning? Why?It was only 5:00 p.m., but it was dark outside. The room wasstuffy and overheated. I was sitting in a therapist’s giant leather chairfeeling small and nervous, not knowing what to expect or what tosay. His name was Dr. Bittman. He was a big man, lumbering, withdroopy eyes, and his office was dusty and the furniture was heavy.Dr. Bittman was slouched in his worn leather chair; from whereI was sitting I could hear his stomach growling. Finally, he lookedat me and spoke up, “Ms. Levy, what brings you here?” I got veryemotional, and I wanted to talk about God. I asked him, “Where isGod?” I said I’d been praying for an answer. I started tearing up, andI looked over . . . and he was sleeping. My therapist was out cold.I woke him up. I said, “HELLO!” And his whole body jerked theway it does when you wake up suddenly. “You were sleeping,” I said.And he said, “No I wasn’t.”
THIRTY-ONE
If God were living on earth, people would breakHis windows.
Yiddish proverb
 
122
Hope Will Find You
“Yes you were.”“No I wasn’t.”“I woke you; your whole body jerked.”“I wasn’t sleeping,” he insisted.It got really quiet in the room except for his stomach, and then helooked at me and said, “Well, hypothetically, if I
were
sleeping, howwould that make you
  feel 
?I thought to myself,
I can’t even hold a therapist’s attention, how canI expect to hold God’s attention?
I was a rabbi and God was no comfort to me.Who was my God? I thought about the way God appeared in theBible through so many different lenses. Every biblical personality en-countered God in a very personal and specific way. Abraham’s Godwas an aloof, even sadistic, God of tests, who was willing to pit mo-rality, love, and compassion against faith. Jacob’s approach to Godwas all about Monty Hall and
Let’s Make a Deal 
 —“If you do this forme, I’ll do that for you.” Moses’ God was all Hollywood, a God of special effects and pyrotechnics—ten plagues, seas parting.On the High Holy Days, I was taught to see a God who was pun-ishing and judgmental. A God who sits on a throne evaluating all ourdeeds and decides who will live and who will die.Who was my God?There certainly were times in my life when I hated God. Timeswhen I could not pray. Times when I could not even bring myself tosay Kaddish, the Jewish memorial prayer, for my own father, whotaught me to love God, who taught me how to pray, who brought meto synagogue every Sabbath and let me hide beneath the wings of hisprayer shawl.

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