8Learn something inan unlikely place.
I took a swig of iced tea and wiped the tears from myeyes. Rob was basking in his fifteen seconds of fame asthe next act began. After the economy of Olive’s anatomy,the audience was primed for this performer.“If any member of our audience is lactose intolerant,this is my warning to you,” the announcer shouts into thePA system. “What you are about to see has never been seenin America. Straight from her East African Tour, the womanwho could breastfeed the entire Indian subcontinent….Runner-up for the Nobel Peace Price. Let’s give a warmwelcome to Ms. Third World!”The curtain rose and the music began to thump. Fromthe fluorescent mist covering the stage, there emerged twomassive fleshy mounds attached to the figure of a woman.These were, without a doubt, the largest breasts anyone hadever seen. Ever. They were so big that her tank-top strapslooked like angel-hair pasta. I don’t think anyone willremember her face, but … Oh that rack! It was glorious. The