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Writer Author or Whatever

Writer Author or Whatever

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Published by Anita Kainthla
Its hard being a writer but harder having a visiting card if you are one. Try an innovative technique to ward off visiting card demands, in case you are a writer and don't have one.
Its hard being a writer but harder having a visiting card if you are one. Try an innovative technique to ward off visiting card demands, in case you are a writer and don't have one.

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Published by: Anita Kainthla on Sep 07, 2010
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01/01/2012

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Writer, author or whatever There are writers and there are writers. You know. There are the Pulitzer andBooker kinds and then there are the rest of them, us I mean.To begin with it took 28 years of cumulative courage to admit that I wanted to bea writer and then when you have used up your twenties in mostly the fear of ‘coming out’ the following decades of your life are followed up by the fear of never being read by anyone save your own self. This is how the journey mostly begins. From thereon the additives only get worse than just the fear of ‘comingout’ or not being read- panic, horror, cold and hot sweat bouts, stammers, andsince this is not the whole of the list, I have to end it with ‘etc’.“So what do you do”? This is the harshest blow you can land on such a writer.The answer has to be forcibly extricated from the complicated permutations andcombinations of the writer’s brain wiring and looped over the dreaded additives Italked of earlier, before it can see the light of day and make it all the way to your auditory canal. This question pushes most writers, first into a restive silence,which can sometimes be so interminably long that we could have enduredanother change of generation in that time. However, if you do survive this youwill be rewarded with a stammer, mumble and babble, in that order. And then,wait for it, the two syllable answer is thrown out like an outcaste with a
 
despicably communicable disease-‘writer’- and then silence. Torture. In thatorder.There you go I said it, now it’s your turn. ‘Oh- a writer? Hmmm”. Silence.“Interesting”. More silence. More torture. Interesting as in foolish, I know that’swhat you mean. I know the tone.“So what do you write?” more torture.‘Umm..ah…” continued torture.‘I’ve written a couple of books, some magazine articles, poetry, travel, shortstories’ (by god I wasn’t being pompous. What I was saying was true. To savemy self I had been writing just about whatever I could).“Impressive”. And then this “So under what name do you write?”What? Do people use pen names even today? No you idiot, what he means is thatsince he has never read your name anywhere in print he’s just assuming that youuse a pen name.‘I use my own name’ and that is that.And if you haven’t read my name in print is because it has not dispersed well.Well that’s how it is as of now, but some day…( ‘some day’ is the favored phraseof all writers’ dreams). Besides you’d have to be reading all, absolutely everywritten word, to come across my name in print. Well as of now at least, but someday… And the dream sequence continues.
 
But wait for the final blow. “Can I have your card?”By this time I think the fellow is joking. I smile, he extends his hand. He’sserious and I’m speechless, yet again. More silence. And then in the league of Thomas Alva Edison’s inventiveness, a fantastic idea was invented in thelabyrinths of my writer’s brain wiring. This idea stayed and has since been triedand tested successfully on many more such episodes of random acquaintanceencounters. I pretend- fumble in my
‘jhola’ 
(- an Indian writer’s sack-cloth or canvas bag)- a must-have writer accessory, which is a telltale of his/her  profession and somewhat eases those torturous silences I have been recounting.So I fumble in my
‘jhola’ 
and come out with a sorry face, ‘Sorry, I’m all out of cards. Just so forgetful’, smile and let it go at that. ‘Forgetfulness’, that was amaster stroke. Of course it stinks of writerliness and its horrors.This card business, however, has become a necessary menace. Everyone in thechain of chai-wallahs to dhobis and school teachers to what not, save circuitousexplanations of careers by simply exchanging cards. Some are so elaborate thatone could extract material for a whole reasonable word length article that wouldreceive suitable remuneration. But the many writerly reserves of a writer cannotelicit words about his line of work that might look pretty on this small square of  paper called a visiting card. When you belong to the side that stands opposite theBooker and Pulitzer kind of writers then what do you put on that paper? ‘Writer’,

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JM Murray added this note
Fascinating. So true. I still say I'm a teacher first, writer in my free time, even though I've published 9 books!
Anita Kainthla added this note
Thanks Arjun... glad you liked it.. its true:-)
Anita Kainthla added this note
Thank you one and all for reading and commenting....
7BILLIONHUMANBEING added this note
great read write gets my stars thanks god teaches father mike
Anita Kainthla added this note
Oh thanks Rose:-)
Rose added this note
Delightful!
Anita Kainthla added this note
Thanks guys... Glad it resonated :-)
Shyam Adrift added this note
ha! ha! good one!

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