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Talking Stories

Talking Stories

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Published by: mindprofessor on Sep 22, 2010
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06/14/2011

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www.robbybrown.orgCopyright 2002 Robby V. Brown, All rights reserved.
Robby Brown
Talking Stories
 
The Exorcism
A
middle-aged woman brought her 8-year-old daughter Mary in to see me.Mary was a very imaginative child who was a good student at school butbecame the terror of the neighborhood when she arrived home. She claimedto hate her younger sibling but loved the youngest. She was the elder of thethree. When asked about the reasons for her behavior and attitude hersimple reply was ³the monster made me do it´. It was always the same replyfor all of the negative behavior. Now from the beginning of this session thechild and I were sitting on floor of my office and the mother was sitting on acouch opposite of us.
A
fter hearing about this monster¶s terrible powers forabout enough I pulled myself away from facing the child and pulled my kneesup to my chest. I then began to mumble unintelligibly to myself. The childbecame curious as to my odd behavior. She asked me what I was doing. Iignored her. Once again she asked what I was doing to which I ignored aswell. I began to get visibly agitated and with a slightly raised voice said ³of course your mother hasn¶t got the slightest bit of courtesy now does she´?The mother sat rather stunned across the room when I winked at her. ³Whatdo you mean´? The child exclaimed! ³Your mother took you out of a perfectlygood day of school and brought you here without telling you anything aboutme!´ ³What disrespect to my powers!´ ³What powers?´ The child asked withanxious excitement. ³Why you are looking at none other than the masterwizard for the entire State of Florida!´ I exclaimed while pulling an odd pencilout of my pocket. ³I am one of the most powerful wizards in the universe andI am an expert on monsters who trouble little children.´ The child sat there ina look of awe that I cannot recall ever seeing in a child. ³There has yet to bea monster in this land which I have not been able to defeat. Why I am theonly wizard who can make a monster leave and he never returns.´ I thenlooked the child in the eyes and said, ³do you know what this means if themonster is no longer making you behave badly´?
³I
will be good´
sheexclaimed and clapped with childish excitement.
A
ll right I feel we are readyto begin as I got the child and mother in a circle on the floor. I got out alarge piece of paper and drew a big ³X´ on it.
A
fter ³making up´ some spells,I instructed the child to grab the monster and I would smash him onto the ³X´ on the paper. I then told the mother and child to wad up the paper. Wetook it outside of my office and burned ³the monster´ This was my first andlast session with this child. Her behavior improved remarkably as she nolonger had a monster to blame her ill behavior on. I hear from the mother orget a card once or twice a year and have gotten many referrals from her. Ithas been 3 years now and the monster has not returned.
A
clinician cannot have the luxury of only studying child behavior. One hasto get into the mind of a child and even become one again if only for a shortwhile. Psychotherapy is not yet a pure science. Like fly-fishing it is part artand part science. Take either part away and efficacy suffers.
 
www.robbybrown.orgCopyright 2002 Robby V. Brown, All rights reserved.
The Chain Gang
 
A
12-year-old child was brought to see me by his mother who was in deepdistress due to the abusive behavior he had inflicted on his younger brother.He had repeatedly told his brother that he hated him as well as recentlystabbing him with a screwdriver. There was no father in the picture. Themother shared the previous information with me on the telephone and alsosaid he was unwilling to talk to anyone about it so I was prepared when hecame into my office trailed by mom. I didn¶t even look him in the eye at first.I simply asked sternly, ³Is this him´? To which she responded affirmatively. Ithen looked him over as if I was sizing him up for a costume and jotted downsome meaningless gibberish on my notepad occasionally looking up at him.
A
fter I had intimidated the young man sufficiently I went in for the kill. Iopened my desk drawer and pulled out a telephone book and startedthumbing through it. I pulled my phone closer preparing to make a call. Idrew this out to last approximately fifteen minutes.
A
ll the while speakingnothing to the child. I was simply waiting for him to get curious.
A
s I starteddialing a bogus number he hesitantly asked, ³Who are you calling sir´?
A
ctingas if I missed the number because of his interruption, I made myself toappear visibly flustered and began to ³redial´ and finally muttered ³the chaingang, who else?´ I then attempted to ³redial´. ³Wa-wa-what is the cha-cha-chain gang sir´? He asked. I slammed the phone down visibly upset that hehad interrupted me again. I
A
M C
A
LLING THE CH
A
IN G
A
NG FOR YOU. ³Didyou make arrangements for him to no longer be in school?´ I asked hismother. ³Yes I did,´ she said following along trying to hide her surprise. ³Good, We will have to get him an especially small uniform´« and this andthat.
A
gain more terrified this time the child inquired as to what is achain gang.
I explained to him that they were prison inmates who workedon the side of the road and busted up concrete. I told him my
ONLY
concernwas that he would be unable to lift the sledgehammers they use becausethey weigh as much as he does. ³They have really neat uniforms thoughwhite and black striped. They also chain a big ball to your ankle so you can¶trun away.´ 
A
fter I had sufficiently glorified the duties of 1940¶s chain gangs Ipicked up the phone to call and see if they had any ³smaller hammers´ 
A
ssoon as he saw I was making a call he politely spoke up and said ³Is thereany way you can help me so I wont have to go to the chain gang´? ³Well Isuppose but if you harm your brother again it is straight to the chain gangyoung man´! I spent about 20 minutes talking to him about how to controlhis anger and talk about things instead. I then brought his mom in andinstructed her to go buy some ammonia ³smelling salts´ at the drug store.
A
ny time he tries to harm his brother or gets angry she is to break one andimmediately put it under his nose.Mom has yet to have to use the smelling salts and the child has a newfoundrespect for his brother. It has been a year this was my first and last sessionwith this child and his mother emails me often to tell me how well he isdoing.
 
 
www.robbybrown.orgCopyright 2002 Robby V. Brown, All rights reserved.
Grow Some Balls
A
local divorce recovery group referred a young woman to me. She wasmeek and mild tempered. It was hard for her to talk about her divorce. Whenit came to more intimate ways she had been abused, she could not evenmutter the names of sexual organs. She was uptight, guilty, and timid. Shequietly talked for most of the session about the abuse that consumed hermarriage. It was sad indeed. We came to the end of the session and I toldher I was going to tell her something that was indeed going to make hermad, but also not like me or ever come back to see me again. I also told herthat if she chose not to heed my advice or come see me again that I didn¶treally care. I would not loose a moment¶s sleep at night over it. She quietlyand anxiously awaited what I was about to say.
³
Your problem Jenny isthat you need to grow some balls´!
She sat there stunned while I wroteout her bill.I was speaking at the divorce recovery group Jenny attended later thatweekend. She spoke of being angry at first and then how insensitive I was asI wrote out her bill for the session. Then she produced perhaps the hugestgrin I have ever seen! She said she only wished someone had told her thatyears before and how she had needed to hear that all her life. She theninformed me that she could not come back to see me that week because shehad decided to sign up for school to be a probation officer. I smiled and toldhe how happy I was for her.
A
few weeks later she called me. There wasmuch noise in the background. ³Dr. Brown, guess what I¶m doing, we are outon the range shooting our shotguns, BOOM«BOOM«BOOM!´ I could hardlyhear her over the noise of the firing range. I could only find but one reply:
³
Lady,
I
told you to grow some balls,
I
didn¶t say they had to be thatbig!´
my reply was jovial indeed.This was my first and last session with Jenny. One bit of advice thoughshould you ever meet her« don¶t mess with her. That woman has some balls.

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