How to Avoid Disappointments

Disappointments are part and parcel of life. In this circus of existence,

you cannot have your way all the time. Things change; people change. Events
and results have an unpredictable and uncontrollable way of happening. To
keep yourself from being utterly frustrated and dismayed, here are some
things to avoid or at least soften the pangs of great disappointment:

1. Expect the best but be ready for the worst.

When you work hard on something, it's natural to expect the best results.
And the most glorious rewards. But sometimes things don't turn out the way
you want them to. To keep from being dreadfully dismayed, expect the best,
but at the same time, psyche yourself up for the worst. Then you'll be
ready for any unexpected turn of events!

2. Give it your best shot.

Much of the frustration that follows a failure is the big disappointment

you feel towards yourself. When you do not try hard enough, you are
overcome with guilt and regret. In whatever you are doing, do your best,
give it your best shot. Then you'll know you did all you can and you should
be proud for trying.

3. Realize that you cannot own people.

We often expect people to act or be a certain way that would be congruous

to how we want them to be. Realize that you do not and can not own people.
Each person has his own mind and the natural right to free will. Give
others the gift of space and freedom. Remember that when you lose someone,
whatever you were expecting was not meant to be.

4. Realize that we are just temporary stewards of things.

When you lose material things, whether they are stolen from you or gutted
down by a fire, minimize your grief by realizing that we are just temporary
keepers of what we own. They will finally find their way to where they were
destined to be. Besides, when you finally go, you cannot take a single
thing with you.

5. Never expect anything back.

People get bitterly disappointed when they don't get back what they give to
others. People always expect (some even demand!) repayment. This is a major
cause of extreme frustration. When you help someone (especially
financially) do not expect anything back. Think of it as a gift of love
that's given freely and completely with no strings attached.

6. Don't pin your life on one person.

You would be doing yourself a great injustice if you pinned your life on
one person. No one person should take control, importance or dominance over
your existence. People come and go in our lives. If you depend too much on
someone, you will feel so shattered, helpless and hopeless if you lose him.
Make sure you can stand on your own two feet. And live your own dreams, not
other people's.

7. Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

To avoid disappointment from losing anything, don't put all your eggs in
one basket. It's a good practice to have more than one project happening so
that when one fails, you have others to look forward to. Regarding
financial investment, it is wise to diversify. The more things you have
going, the less the chance of losing it all.

8. Realize that success is a combination of many factors.

You do not have full control over the outcome of things. Even with all the
necessary preparations and precautions, things may end up differently from
how you want them to. There are many factors and variables that determine
how something or an event will turn out. And that includes the weather!

9. Realize that you will always get another chance.

If you don't succeed now, there will always be another time. Tell yourself
that maybe it just isn't the right time yet for what you desire. Keep in
mind that you will always get another chance to get a crack at it. Never
lose hope. Hope springs eternal.

10. Realize that without defeat, victory won't be as sweet.

You have to feel the bitterness of failure to be able to savor the

sweetness of success. Failures make you strong and powerful. Use them as a
challenge for more determination to go after your dreams next time. Analyze
why you failed and learn from your mistakes.

11. Realize that the universe has its own divine plan.

Yes indeed, the universe has a divine design. It has its own unchangeable,
unique plan which may be very different from yours. You may not understand
it at all for now, but it is something you have to force yourself to live
with. Going against the current will just frustrate you. Do what the Zen
masters preach: Go with the flow!

12. When things turn out awry, it's not the end of the world.

The world will not end just because something did not turn out the way you
expected it to. It will keep on turning even if you cried a bathtub of
tears in your own little dark corner. So dry your eyes and erase those
disappointments. Hey, Friends! flash on a smile! Tomorrow is another day.