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A Day in the Life of Sora

A Day in the Life of Sora

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Published by Mercedes-Amber

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Published by: Mercedes-Amber on Oct 14, 2010
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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10/14/2010

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From the creative genius that brought you Mom? What's Sex?, here is a totally new comedycrack thing that I decided to do,because, let's face it, everyone writes random crazy -BLEEP- when they're a bit bored, huh?
Crossover: Kingdom Hearts, Naruto, Twilight, Percy Jackon, K-On!!, and maybe a few littlerandom cameos. (Who knows who's in it, I'm just writing whatever comes into my head.)
Rating: T+ (Could possibly change to M, I have no idea yet.) Language, innuendos, yaoi,bashing of certain pink-haired girls and sparkly sappy vampires, moe (MOE MOE KYUN~!!...Yeah, if you watch K-On!!, you get that instantly), and adult-ish themes.
Is there a plot? No, not as such; not yet at least. I warn ye, this may not actually go anywhere interms of plot. xD Hopefully though, it will make sense (albeit in a random, crazy sort of way), andy'all will like it. I don't know if this is a one shot, or different random chapters... we'll have to waitand see, you and I both, reader.
-CAST-(Cast and Mentions)Kingdom Hearts:SoraKairiAxelRikuRoxasNaruto:NarutoSasukeSakuraHinataKibaK-On!!: YuiRitsu/RicchanMioPercy Jackson:PercyAnnabethChironTwilight:EdwardBellaJacobAliceJasper Renesmee (Cannibal Baby)
Sora was sat in front of the large white computer screen, scrolling down occasionally. Hewas reading some stuff called 'fan fiction'. Riku had recommended it and slyly told Sora to searchthrough the vast Kingdom Hearts lists for fiction labelled as 'yaoi'. Puzzled, he'd asked Riku what'yaoi' was, but the silver-haired boy just smirked and said: 'Just wait and see.'Sora muttered crossly to himself as he searched. 'Stupid character deaths...sure, likeAxel would
ever 
do that...' Once or twice, Sora found himself with a nosebleed as he read themore saucier fics. Mopping up his nose, he continued to search for a yaoi fiction.He was just reading a story set two years after the Kingdom Hearts trio's return to Destiny
 
Islands, when he felt a presence behind him. He rolled his eyes and leaned back in his chair.'Naruto?' He guessed impatiently. (It wasn't that hard to guess really. When Naruto's around, youcan tell. The scent of ramen and
emo
follow him everywhere.)The blonde ninja leaped in front of Sora and nodded rapidly, fist in the air. 'Yeah, it's me!!!Naruto Uzumaki, the number one hyperactive--''Yeah, yeah, whatever.' Sora frowned and waved his hand in the air, bored with Naruto'sconstant energy. 'I know who you are. The knuckle head, blah,
blah.
' He droned and gave a fakeyawn.Naruto wasn't put off by Sora's obvious irritation, and turned to face the computer screen,sticking his butt in Sora's face as he did so. 'So, whatcha up to, then???''Gah!' The spiky brunnette leaned further back in his chair, trying to escape Naruto's largebutt. 'Just looking for yaoi! Whatever it is. Now, kindly get your 
ass
out of my face!' Sora gruntedas he lifted up a leg, and dug it into Naruto's backside. Naruto went flying. Sora rolled his eyes,and swivelled the chair back in front of the PC.Naruto got up, brushing the air from his face with the air of someone who fell over andknows that everyone saw, yet still tries to make it look like they did
not 
fall. 'Yaoi???' He asked,interested. 'I didn't know you were into yaoi!!! You totally should have told me!!!' He began to nodrapidly again.'Grr.' Sora growled as he clutched his head. Naruto's over-use of exclamation marks wasgiving him a headache. 'I don't even know what it is.' Sora said through gritted teeth.'Oh!!! It's boy on boy!!!' Naruto explained.Sora's eyes widened. 'I'm sorry? Repeat that.''Boy!!! On!!! Boy!!!''Okay, okay! Stop.' Sora paused to think. 'Like,
gay 
stuff?'Naruto had turned into a nodding dog (actually, nodding fox is more appropriate. Andsafe. Because we all know Kiba has sex with dogs, and '
WHAT'S UP WITH THAT!?'
), and Sorahoped his head would fall off.'Like the stuff that all those fangirls think of me and Sasuke doing!!!' Sora and Narutoheard distant squeals. 'See??? They love it!!!' The squeals got louder, untill a few shots rang out.Then there was silence. Naruto looked oddly sombre for a moment. 'But Sasuke hates thefangirls.' He cheered up as the black-haired man himself walked in, Uzi in hand.'Sassy-cakes!!!' Naruto leaped at Sasuke in a totally un-manly way and Sasuke raised aneyebrow at the approaching ninja. Then Naruto vanished, to appear as a log behind Sasuke.Sasuke couldn't turn fast enough and the log smacked him square in the face. WHACK! Sorawinced at the sound.Sasuke staggered back, clutching his face. 'That damn log.'Naruto re-appeared and started fussing over Sasuke. 'OMG!!! SASSY-CAKES!!! R ULIEK ALRITE?!!''Go away,' was the mumbled reply.Sora rolled his eyes. 'Wait a minute. Aren't Naruto and Hinata supposed to date? AndSasuke and Sakura?'Sasuke sat up instantly and glared at Sora. 'Don't you ever. Say that again.' At thatmoment, in a fit of 'random appearance-ness', Sakura skipped through the door, humming. (Yes,she stunk quite badly. In fact, it was well known that Sakura only bathed on her birthday. Butsince the, um, unfortunate Sasuke-purposely-threw-newly-sharpened-kunai-at-Sakura's-oversized-forehead-and-penetrating-her-thick-skin-giving-her-brain-damage-so-she-will-never-be-the-same-again incident, she had forgotten her birthday, and so, never bathed.)'Sasuke!' Sakura drooled and launched herself at the curtain. She grabbed it tight andstarted to carress it. 'Ohh, Sasuke, I'm so glad you're here!' She drooled again.The real Sasuke looked nauseated, and he was suddenly struck with an idea.'Oops!!! Sorry!!!' Naruto cried to the unconcious Sasuke.When Sasuke woke up, the idea hit him. Again. Fortunately, this time, it only gave him aheadache.'Hey, Sakura.' He called to the pink-haired troll.'Yes, my little Sassy-poo?' Sakura drooled, nuzzling the curtains with her cheeks'How about a race?' He suggested slyly and watched her reaction. 'A
 
race to, er, my house?'Sakura jumped up and down. 'Yes! Yes!' She cried and started to limber up. 'When do westart, my little emo-muffin?'Sasuke repressed a shudder, and said, 'Now?' Then he sighed deeply. 'But you're closer to the exit. It's just in front of you. The, um, the door. That means you'll get to my place beforeme.' He sighed again, for good measure. 'That means you get to kiss me.'Sakura put on foot out into midair through the open window. 'Yes! I'll get to kiss you!'Sora and the others heard far away boos from newly arrived fangirls. 'The door's just here, yes?'The black-haired '
emo muffin' 
nodded, and spoke encouragingly. 'Yeah, just there.' Herehe stopped and waited eagerly. Sakura let go of the Sasuke-curtain and rushed out of the openwindow, drooling....SPLAT.'Yes.' Sasuke said and gave a nasty chuckle. He rushed to the window and peered downat Sakura's feebly moving body. In the distance, it was a celebration. The yaoi fangirls had startedto cheer. Some had even put up banners, 'NaruSasu4EVAR'. (Evar spelt backwards spells rave.Epic. )Naruto took Sasuke's pale hand, and smirked at him. 'C'mon!!! Sasuke!!! Let's go have ayaoi-orgasm-fest to celebrate!!!'The fangirls fainted in a collective heap.As the blonde and the emo bounded away to their 
love nest,
Sora sat stunned in front of his computer screen. When he found he was finally able to move, he looked up at the ceiling. Hetilted his head.'Oh, hey, O Grand Author.''Sup?' O Grand Author replied.Sora frowned and motioned to the PC. 'Confused.''Yeah, me too.' The O Grand Author confessed.'Le gasp! But you're the O Grand Author! You can't be confused!' Sora was certain of that. 'You're the one that writes this crazy bull!'O Grand Author rolled her eyes. 'Jeezum. You expect me to be so freaking awesome,don't you? Oh, and by the way, the name's Mercedes.'Sora snorted. 'Mercedes Benz.'Thunder rumbled and the room flashed with lighting. 'WHAT WAS THAT?' Roared the OGrand Author.Sora had taken refuge under this desk, and peered his head out. 'Nothing, your Epicness.Nothing at all.''Pshyeahwhatever.' The O Grand Author faded away.'Wait!' Sora called out. 'Come back! I'm sorry! I need your help!' He waited, and whennothing happened, he grumbled to himself. 'That's what always happens. They always disappear like that. Oh well. Wonder what else the O Grand Author has planned for today.' (Psh, like Iknow.)Sora ran his hands through his spiky hair and began to search for yaoi again. A fewtimes, he thought he saw something promising, but they usually featured major character deaths,and/or Riku being a complete icehole.Kairi walked into the room quietly, and pulled a stool out from under the bookshelf. Asshe looked at the stool, she retched. 'Another one of Sakura's. I'm fed up of finding her shiteverywhere!' (Surely, y'all know that a stool is a scientific name for poo, right?)Sora blinked, O Grand Author made Kairi swear! Surely this was out of character? Hepulled a disgusted face as Kairi made her way to the bathroom to flush the stool away. Shewashed her hands and came back, grabbing a chair and sitting next to Sora. 'Hey.' She said, as agreeting.'Hey.' Sora replied and scrolled down some more. 'What's up?''Nothing,' Kairi said, but she looked over her shoulder as she said it.'Why did you look over your shoulder as you said that?'Kairi frowned. 'You weren't even looking at me, Sora.'He rolled his eyes. 'We're in a fiction, remember? We automatically know everythingthat's been written.'

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