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MD Jokes

MD Jokes



|Views: 2,557 |Likes:
Published by Barbara Duck
Medical Humor from Physicians July 2008
I don't know where these came from, but well worth a read and laugh.
Medical Humor from Physicians July 2008
I don't know where these came from, but well worth a read and laugh.

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Published by: Barbara Duck on Jul 25, 2008
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial


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1. A man comes into the ER and yells, 'My wife's going to have her baby in thecab!' I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, andbegan to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs-and I was in thewrong one.Submitted by Dr. Mark MacDonald,San Antonio ,TX2. At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightlydeaf female patient's anterior chest wall. 'Bigbreaths,' I instructed. 'Yes, they used to be,' replied the patient.Submitted byDr. Richard Byrnes,Seattle,WA3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husbandhad died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not morethan five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family thathe had died of a 'massive internal fart.'Submitted byDr. Susan Steinberg ,Manitoba,Canada4. During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, heinformed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with one of his medications.'Which one?' I asked. 'The patch. The nurse told me to put on a new one every sixhours and nowI'm running out of places to put it!' I had him quickly undress and discoveredwhat I hoped I wouldn't see. Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body! Now,the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one.Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair,Norfolk,VA5. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, How long have youbeen bedridden?' After a look of completeconfusion she answered...'Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband wasalive.'Submitted by Dr. Steven SwansonCorvallis,OR6. I was caring for a woman and asked, 'So how's your breakfast this morning?''It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. Ican't seem to get used to the taste' the patient replied. I then asked to see thejelly and the woman produced a foil packetlabeled 'KY Jelly.'Submitted by Dr. Leonard Kransdorf,Detroit,MI

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