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LancMoms Magazine - January 2011

LancMoms Magazine - January 2011

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Published by: LNP MEDIA GROUP, Inc. on Jan 10, 2011
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 Kimberly Fletcher
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January 8, 2011
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, P
.LANCMOMS.COM• JANuAry 8, 011
Allow me to set the stage.As I write this, Christmas isnine days away. There is lots,lots, lots to do. I’m frazzled, butdetermined to remain happilyfocused as I wrap, bake andaddress my way through theDecember daze.My daughter is busy with
school, and in the nal days of 
rehearsal for “Nutcracker!’’ I’moverwhelmed with a franticschedule at home and at work sotime, to say the least, is stretchedlike a taut, red gift ribbon.My alarm, set for 5:30 a.m.on this particular day (and everyday), allowed me to check off extra items on the to-do list whilemy daughter enjoyed extendedshut-eye. I even whipped up abacon-and-cheese omelet for the slumbering, sixth-gradeballerina. (In the interest of fulldisclosure, this is not the regular breakfast menu.)I called for her to comedownstairs. She was cheerful.Even happier, when she saw the
feast of eggs, English mufn and
hot tea.I headed upstairs to check thelaundry, and get ready for work.ll was well.Until I returned downstairs.And entered the kitchen.And gazed toward the sink.There, at its edge, was theplate, fork, cup and saucer uponhich my daughter had justdined. Unlike the dishes, she hadanished. In an instant, so didmy Christmas spirit.I realize that the exhaustivetrek from the kitchen bar tothe kitchen sink probably took an entire three steps. But I’mguessing she wasn’t gasping for oxygen by the time she arrivedat the counter.True, rinsing off her dishes,opening the dishwasher door and placing utensil and plate insidewould have required additionalcaloric output. Closing thedishwasher door, even more. Butfor a healthy dancer who spendshours a day running, talking,stretching, talking, leaping andtalking, I’m thinking she canhandle it.And she did, quite adeptly,when she was summoneddownstairs to do what she should
have done in the rst place.
Which brings me to this: Whymust I repeatedly ask that things be done around the house? Andwhy do other parents think I’mnuts?Too many of my friends,exasperated by children and, I’msorry here, men, by husbands aswell, have given up, saying it’seasier to grab the dish rag and dothe work themselves.I refuse to surrender, but thatdoesn’t mean I’ve won the war.I know what I’m up against.For example, items I leaveon the staircase aren’t thereto accessorize the carpet.Toilet paper, books, shoes andtoothpaste are strategically positioned so they can’t beoverlooked by the next empty-handed person headed up thestairs.Or can they?Because my daughter hasno supernatural powers, I’massuming that she uses her feetand the steps a couple timesa day to get to and from her upstairs bedroom.Amazingly, however, itemson the staircase are unmoved.For days, even a week at a time.I can only surmise that they areinvisible to her.Yet I believe that kids capableof dribbling a basketball arounda court for hours at a time or chasing a soccer ball seasonafter season have the stamina totoss dirty clothes into the washer.Maybe even pull them from thedryer and fold them. I bet theycan push a lawn mower, or dustthe tabletops. And, yes, carry thetoiletries upstairs.Instead, too many parentsare doing all of this for them.But why? Why are we coddlingour kids? Are we afraid itwon’t be done perfectly? Thatthey’ll burn down the house?Will this approach help them to become responsible membersof a household and, ultimately,independent young adults?Being in a family is like being part of a sports team or a dancecompany or a musical group:Everyone must do his or her partfor the good of all. That means perfecting a pirouette ANDcleaning the commode.To do any less is, simply,unacceptable.At worst, we’re raising ageneration that feels entitled toeverything and responsible for nothing. At best, we’re setting a poor example for what it meansto be stewards of our homes andcommunities.So parents, stand with me.Say no to co-dependency.Take a cue from those amongus who’ve found the balance between childhood activity andhousehold duty. And take noteof kids who seem to have theroutine down pat.Omelet, anyone?
 Barbara Hough Roda is momto Faith and managing editor of the Sunday News. Contact her at broda@lnpnews.com or 481-7335. Check out her blog at  LancMoms.com.
Put that plate in the dishwasher
Barbara Hough Roda
Check out what other Lancaster Moms (andDads) are doing and saying. Forums, blogs,questions, and answers all can be found atLancMoms.com. Get a LancMoms.comcard, good for discounts and services.
 Visit LancMoms.com
Infamous Ryders founder, Chris Lopez, top, helps youngeInfamous Ryders, brothers Julian, from left, and JaidenBermudez, both 6, and their cousin Juju Holland, 9, distributetoys at Crispus Attucks Community Center last month.
 ( Justin Graybill/Sunday News Photo 
Need a recipe?
Check out LancMoms.com’s Recipe FinderEverything from Almond Joy Cheesecake to
Pumpkin Apple Wafes.
, P
.LANCMOMS.COMJANuAry 8, 2011 • 
 By Maureen Leader Special Features Writer 
Mom of the Month, KimberlyFletcher has had a few surprisesas a mother. But as busy as thismother of 17-year-old twins,atasha and Morgan, is, she’snever missed a beat.
In Fletcher’s fth month of 
pregnancy she was surprised tolearn that she was having twins.“Looking at that ultrasoundas shocking. It was quite asurprise.” Though there are twinsin her husband Tracy’s family,Fletcher never considered thepossibility of herself havingthem.“I just didn’t think about it,”she said. Even though she wasshocked and afraid, it was morethe “fear of the unknown.” Inthe past, when she had thoughtabout having a family, it was,“I’ll have a baby and then two tothree years later, I’ll have another baby.” But Fletcher recalls as achild she always wanted to be a
twin and nds it interesting that
she ended up having them.“The last 17 years have beena lot of fun. The girls cameout running,” said Fletcher.Apparently they never stopped!They have been involved withdance, basketball, track, tennisand some drama. They evenhad a small scene in the popular movie, “School of Rock.” Andwhile the girls were growing up,she and Tracy were at almostevery event. “It’s been verycool,” she said. But it has gone by fast. “Truly a blink of aneye.”And it’s because of this thatFletcher says she really tries to“be there in the moment.” Shesaid she would describe herself as a “fun loving mom andincredibly demonstrative.”She says she likes a lot of thesame music as her daughtersand loves shopping with them.The Fletchers have alwaysenjoyed their Family Movie Night complete with popcornand candy. “We’ve always donethat.” Fletcher added that eventhough her daughters have agreat group of friends she’s gladthat they still like their traditionalFamily Movie Night.Fletcher is a mom whounderstands how importanther time, her hobbies and her interests are. When the girls
were about ve years old,
Fletcher was driving with themand she started singing along toa song. The girls said they weresurprised to hear her singingand yet singing was somethingFletcher always enjoyed doing.It surprised her that her girlshad never heard her sing. Sherealized she needed to get back to it. She started to sing at her church regularly and she lovesit still. She has also gotten back into her other hobby: knitting.She remembers knitting while
waiting for the girls to nish a
dance class. But lately she’s beenable to devote more time to it.Surprisingly, the Fletchers areunsure if the girls are identicalor not. They look very similar  but they can’t be 100 percentsure if they are identical unlessthey have a DNA test. Fletcher  believes they’ll probably havethe test at some point before thegirls go to college next year.An obvious big surpriseto Fletcher was that she wasnominated to be Mom of the
Month in the rst place. Her 
daughter, Morgan completedthe questionnaire. When asked,“What are the two best thingsabout this mom?” Morgan wrote,“She is a very dedicated personand always makes sure thateveryone’s wants and needs aremet.” Fletcher said, “It’s nice toknow she is still watching. Your  babies are always watching you but it is nice to know that at 17,she is still watching.”When Fletcher looks back on the past years raising her daughters to young womanhoodshe says, “I am proud, I am blessed and I am humbled. Thereally, really are great kids.” Now that the girls are lookinat colleges, Fletcher soon willhave an empty nest. She says,“My reality will change.”But don’t feel sorry for Kimberly Fletcher. Don’t think for a minute that this Mom othe Month will be alone with her knitting and her singing onceher girls go away to school.Fletcher already has things planned for her and her husband:“Wherever they attend, we’ll beon the highway … we’ll be aeverything.”
Mom of theMonth
Kimberly Fletcher with her daughters Natasha, left, and Morgan, right.
Kimberly Fletcher
”Fletcher loves to travel, especially to the Caribbean.
She has always worked outside the home and is in the HumanResources eld.
 A perfect day for her involves a nice dinner after a full dayof shopping.Fletcher attended Franklin and Marshall College and met her husband, Tracy, there.The Fletcher family has a dog named Romeo.She loves to bake and says she is known for her pound cake.She says, “I’m a dessert girl!”Fletcher enjoys spending time with her mother and her sister.One of their favorite things to do is to attend wine tastingstogether.Fletcher is a mom who picks her battles. On some things sheis strict, she says, but on others she is more relaxed.
Mom details
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Mom of the Month sponsors

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