daydreaming, I wasnt afraid, at least not usually. There were bad things, too, at night. It wasntalways good.I thought this daydreaming condition was always supposed to be a relief. Why was it bad?I dont know that it is always supposed to be a relief. I think its an act of creativity. My brainwas always running wild, and I couldnt stop it. Outside, there was nothing but negativity anddiscomfort. There were sounds, horrible sounds, itchy clothing, ugly furniture, dark rooms, bright sun,people who ate like they were in a barnyard. Then there was the abuse, the screaming, yelling, hitting,hair-pulling, kicking..what they called discipline. She scoffs.What about at night? Tell me about the horrors.Right well, you know I have sensitivity to light as well as everything else. I hate bright sunlight,and I hate the dark. Ive always been completely terrified of the dark. Every shadow contained amurderer. Naturally, the combination of my sensitivities, which might have been caused bydisconnection due to my daydreaming, and the fact that I couldnt stop daydreaming all the time, dayand night, every minute.well unfortunately they merged. Except this time, I was sure it was real.During the day, I knew I was daydreaming. I mean Im sure all children do this. They
things. Imnot talking about the hallucinations yet. I mean every little bump and moan, rustle, click, tap, everylittle sound that can drive you mad in a night. I was certain, really certain, that someone was about tobreak in and do terrible things to me every night, as far back as I can remember. I used to hide underthe covers shaking violently and crying. This went on for how long?