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Raising Children

Raising Children

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Published by Cairoden Dimasangca

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Published by: Cairoden Dimasangca on Mar 03, 2011
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial


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Raising Children
Ten lessons on the Islamic way of raising children
Tahera Kassamali
Raising Children
Chapter 1
Training of children
Various definitions of training
Conclusions from theabove definitions
Parents as Trainers
Aspects of Training
. Self-Control
. Change
. Exploiting Potential
Lack of Training
Wise Words
Chapter 2
The Role of the Mother 
Islam¶s respect for theMother 
Emphasis on choosing agood wife
Respect in this world
Respect in the Hereafter 
Holy Qur¶an on the Mother 
Qualities of a Mother 
The role of the Mother 
Strengths of a Mother 
Wise Words
Chapter 3
Religious Training of children
Methods of ReligiousTraining
Some Don¶ts in ReligiousTraining
Wise Words
Chapter 4
A Child¶s need for Love
Effects of Love
Letting the child know he isloved
The love of a mother 
Unconditional Love
Excessive Love
Wise Words
Chapter 5
Self-esteem andChildren
Advantages of a healthyself-esteem
When self-esteem islacking
How to foster self-esteemin a child
Practical Do¶s & Don¶ts for fostering self-esteem
Wise Words
A lesson from the Life of the Prophet
Chapter 6 
Discipline and Control
Advantages of Discipline
What to control?
Some important points
Wise Words
Chapter 7 
Children and Play
Benefits of Play
Types of play
Parents and Play
Companions in play
Some important points
Words of Wisdom
Chapter 8
utside Influences
Wise Words
Chapter 9
Sibling Rivalry
Causes of Jealousy
Hints for reducing SiblingRivalry
Wise Words
Chapter 10
Mistakes Parents oftenmake
. Making childrendependent
. Quarreling in front of thechildren
. Expecting too much of children
. Negativity
. Being two-faced
. Humiliating a child in frontof others
Chapter 11
Du`a for VirtuousChildren
Training of children
The duty of every parent is to train the child in the right way. Training means teaching and guiding. Trainingalso means producing required changes in a person. It is not enough for parents to cater for the physical needsof the child. They need to give the child an awareness and knowledge, help him gain good characteristics, anddevelop a virtuous personality. Such training of children has great benefits for the child as well as for thesociety in which he lives. Although many people have an influence on the training of a child, the first and mostimportant trainers are the parents.
The guidance that a parent gives his child is vital for the progress of the child. Although the child may notappreciate it at the time, a loving parent knows that it is incumbent upon him to make his child learn from hisown knowledge and experience. This enables the child to avoid the mistakes the parent may have made, andbenefit from his wisdom. Imam `Ali (a) wrote a will to his son Imam Hasan (a), advising him on how to live inthis world. In the will he explains why he felt it necessary to advise his son: 
found you a part of myself, rather 
found you my whole, so much that if anything befell you, it was asthough it befell me, and if death came to you, it was as though it came to me. Consequently your affairsmeant to me as my own matters would mean to me. So
have written this piece of advice as aninstrument of help . . .
Certainly, the heart of a young man is like uncultivated land.
t accepts whatever is strewn on it. So
 hastened to mould you properly before your heart hardens up and your mind gets occupied. So that youmay be ready to accept through your intelligence, the results of experiences of others and be saved fromgoing through these experiences yourself.
Nahjul Balagha
, Letter 31
Various definitions of training
An action or a series of actions carried out on those who have not yet achieved full (physical and emotional)growth, to guide them in their thoughts and manners in order to create a strong and balanced human being.
A process to help the growth of mental and spiritual powers of the human being to go towards perfection.
An informed and thoughtful process which has the aim of guiding, changing, and achieving the fullpotential of, another.

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