Professional Documents
Culture Documents
crucial formula: The most'common servings of beer (12 2 2> Eat something -- never drink on empty stomach.
ounces), wine (5s ounces)'arid dtsfriflelr spirits (1 1/4 Eat berore you go to party, eat while you are there. Solid
ounces) contain equal »aii|ouat%of alcohol. ^ J food likefcfi&ese caal slow flown .the absorption rate.ylf 61
you're throwing sHparty, $erve lots*of miinchies ancl^
Far too many accidents are caused by young people plenty of mixers. \ i- • -.-.*?,: k,
who get behind the wheel of a.car!thinking "I'm fine.
I only had a few|beers." Such misinformation is all too 3> Don't be pushed into drinking more than you can
often deadly. Maybe that's why 50% of all driving handle and don't pressure your friends to keep up with
fatalities are caused by drunk drivers.* And why|two- you. Everyone has an individual tolerance. Let your
thirds of all those arrested for DWI "just had* a few friends pace themselves.
beers."
4> Keep a watchful eye: Cocktails should contain no
more than 11/4 ounces of distilled spirits. Wine is
Dont let your glasses blur commonly no more than a 5 ounce serving and a typical
serving of beer is 12 ounces. If you're mixing your own
drink use a shot glass to measure theliquor.
T**A
Herefare some common and dangerous myths about
«
ii alcohol that should be dispelled:^
f
Don't DrinklAnd|Drive:
A P u b l i c s e r v i c e Message
.'Whether a glass holds 12 ounces of beer, 5 ounces of wine, or 1 'A ounces of spirits, the alcoi From The Merciad
content is the same. Its important to know this because the size and shape of the glass can give
people a distorted impressu >n of how much alcohol they're actually drinking.
So when you're out to share some cheer with friends, remember how mui h alcohol is in your
glass and that drinking sensibly lets you hold things in focus.
C
A public service message from Wffl Roge& Institute
• -•
OCTOBER 8, 198? The Merciad
vember. Last year the Sullivan, and Mike Falk At 1634 East 38th street
administration gave the were each appointed their Across From The Laker Inn
United Wayi $5,000 and respective positions on the
this year^they are seeking Board. Paul Cefrick was
the support of MSG. MSG chosen as a replacement
reps voted to give $350 for Gary Raal in the Stu- ^H
Presoak I
students t& the prelimi-i^ r
y
—
JJ*Ww/to Vendors
rg 3 - H
By Julie Medwig & answers, E.T., Alf and the vote. Bobby was next
Karen Sampson other. Alf got a whopping with 18%, followed by his
65% ("No problem!") and two sisters, Jan and Mar-
Hi! Our names are E.T got 22.5%. *This left cia, both |with 12.5%.
Karen and Julie. This past 12.5% for some very Cindy came in^next with
week we bugged and tor- strange answers,? ranging 10%, and Peter tied with
mented a hundred stu- from Fonzie to "My Fa- "none" with'7.5%. A few
dents around campus for vorite Martian." The most people rallied for Oliver,
the experimental Merciad bizzareganswer^was given but he only managed to
poll. This particular poll by Iciara Shaffrey, who pull in 2.5%. i * |
pertained ftof "Favorite insisted that leprechauns % c thought that the
Things." Here are the are aliens! question, "What is your
results of our wacky poll. "Who is your If a vorite favorite food in the cafe?"
When asked, "What is your Brady Bunch character?" would best be represented
favorite color?" There was proved the popularity of in a pie graph.
a three way tie between Alice, who pulled 22.5% of
blue (25%), red (25%), and
other (25%). Green came
in with 15%, and purple
with 10%. |
Our next question was,
"What's is your favorite
barnyard animal?" The
horse won the race with
40%, followed closely by
the pig with £0%. $ Other
animals, including rab-
bits, tlambs, kittens and
even an owl made the
"other" with|17.5%. Well,
mooing along, the cow
pulled in 15% and finally
the^chicken got 7.5%.
The question, "What is
your favorite alien?"
brought in fthree main
Page 4 ThesMerciad OCTOBER 8, 1987
5
Rough Day/Night At The Office Kovski Korner
By ChrisfKoYski^
and told me that she ran hanged is asked, "Hey, Since Matthew has de-
into some roadblocks and aren't you even worried?" cided to regale you with
couldn't get her assign- and he responds, "If I tales of the trials and tribu-
ment done for the week. worry, will it change the lations of The Merciad, .I've
I [thought
thoucht I was the future?"| .] v in decided to let youti in on
loneliest person in the So, I decided to stop some of the other aspects of
world. Then, Allan Car- worrying! about it. Life the job. I
penter, the news director goes on,; right? Well, I The major drawback is
at WMCY wandered in, knew my life wouldn't go the hours. We're here until
and began telling me on much past Thursday at ^^^^^ after midnight on Mondays,
about |his ^plight. He told 1:00 p.m. if I didn't get a and on Tuesdays, we're usually here until o' dark thirty
me how he was having paper out. I was convinced (very earlyi Wednesday morning).
trouble : getting stories that things couldn't get "My parents have completely forgotten that they have
By Matthew J. Clark turned that week for his any worse. So I chilled-out a 21-year-old son. My dog, who once frolicked around
nightly newscasts. and listened to Bing like a puppy when I came home, now growls menacingly
Last week was a rough •I said "Allan, come on99 Crosby's infamous version as I rush past him into my room, slamming the door shut
one for the staff here at in and join in the agony! of "Hey Jude," along with on his snapping jaw. .jl
The Merciad, andtWMCY Now I >had someone to other memorable cuts ?My cat doesn't know me any more - he spits and hisses
as well. It.was one of those share *my troubles I with. fromjhis "Hey Jude, Hey at me, then attempts to claw me^with his talonless paws.
weeks whensj everything Here was someone in the Bing" LP including "The I then re-invent the catapult. (One good strong arm
seemed to go wrongl a t same predicament as I. I Straight Life*" one?of my motion, andjkitty goes Air Wallbanger.)
once. People were calling had ££ paper to put to- personal favorites, "Little Matt's mother calls up to tell him what his family has
and telling us about * the gether,* and u p . t o that t
Green ---Apples*?'*&'T,h0se*|i for,;dinner, rubtyinfofp tj>e fact that everyonehjalse?*i«i
problems they were hav- point, no stories and he Were The Days," "It's All. having shrimp, while we're eating greasy Four-Star
ing with getting inter- had a newscast to put In The Game," and "Livin' Pizza. ($5.50 - Dinner for two with the coupon from The
views or just getting their together, and no stories. On Lovin'". 5 Merciad.) i
stories done. R? We talked briefly about After Bingl had me Now, to further aquaint you*with The Merciad, I
*It was getting late on the complexities of our worked into a state of bring you.... % I ||>f | \
Monday evening and there respective predicaments musical drunkenness, all I ROBIN LEACH, AND J I'M TALKING LOUDER
were no stories turned in. and both came to the con- could think about; was THAN ANY OTHER H U M A N I B E I N G . AND I DON'T
Just about'the time I was clusion that we should just grabbing myself a tall, KNOW WHY! I
beginning to sort*out t h e ! stop worrying about it. cold glass of Minute Maid Here we have Matthew Clark and Chris Kovski's
thoughts that were raging Yea! I thought, thinking orange juice. But then I preposterous pleasure Jpalace, a j veritable one-room
through my mind, another ^ ^back^ _ ^to^ _a ^1973
^ ^ ^episode
_ _ _ ^ ^of^ was brought back to real- repose in t the I underground chambers of beautiful
member of my staff cau- "Kung Fu" in which Kwai ity when a paint-spattered Baldwin Hall, the mold and mildew capital of the world.
tiously entered the office Chang, on his way to be figure^ happened into the >As I peruse the perpetually perplexing offerings of
office. It was my manag- The Merciad bulletimboard, I see here a treasure trove
The Merciad ^^ ing editor, and he'd just of useful information - everything from news bulletins
Matthew J. Clark, Editor returned from his part- to skewered snapshots of that androgynous?amuser of
Chris Kovski, Managing Editor time job of, what else, youn&children, MICHAEL JACKSON. We also see a
Ann Johnson, News Editor commercial painting. photograph of my favorite fat man, AL WAXMAN. As
Kelley :Moore, Business Manager I informed him of our Al and I were sitting around drinking and eating in his
Paula Bruno, Calendar Editor problems. He suggested bounteous bungalow, he said, "Mr. Leach, have you ever
Karen Sampson, Distribution Manager Bing, and I was in no state- felt that you were aptly named?" AND I DON'T KNOW
Connie Bisbe, Layout | of-mind to argue. "Pass WHY! ^ i
n
Julie Medwig, Layoutl the Minute Maid!" seei KQtneT* pg. 8
VOL. 61 NO. 5
Steve Rush, Cartoonist .-;I
THURSDAY, OCT. 8, 1987
MISTER BOFFO by Joe Martin
OM.^OCE ...lf^ ALL RJM 7
AMP 6AM££ ft*? V00 &A£. * •
just relaxing.
tests. ^ members of ^theater and Duke and Stanford, as %
Last week, the Univer- dance groups -*as well as well as lawyers with the For more Information on
sity of Arizona's College athletes - take drug tests. American Civil Liberties
of Nursing if ormally be- CFCC ^President Bill Union, complained atjjthe becoming a plasma donor
gan debating a proposal Campion said the policy time that forcing athletes
that wouldfmake nursing will apply to any student
in a position to represent
to submit to the tests
would set a precedent al-
454-0070 or
students who exhibit
"inappropriate" behavior the;school. lowing schools to force all
take urinalyses to see if Scores of colleges students, regardless of stop in at 111 W. 9
they've taken any illicit adopted mandatory drug their athletic skills, to NOW EARN EVEN MOREjj MONEY}! 1
i i *Joln our new *
drugs. Students who test tests for their athletes prove they don't take Jl- " BRING fA BUDDY PLAN £•• j-
positive for illicit drugs during the 1986-87 school licit drugs, for each buddy you bring In to
could be expelled. year, largely in reaction to donate, you will earn an extra $ 1 .
*-•
* * A.
Women's
Coach cc
Quality" Players Soccer
Currently, Fleet assists By Connie Bisbe
By Karen Cascio • preferably ffour years of phy, which asks that all
in leading the Women's high school playing expe- players, especially fresh- Coach Roth was finally
Who is a 1987 Mer- team through*? six fto six rience, but also self-confi- men, keep good? grades, rewarded with a victory in
cy hurst graduate with a and a half hours|of prac- dence. For the second emphasizes that, "The the initial varsity season
Bachelor's in Communica- tice per week. This may straight season, a walk-on kids must understand that for the women's soccer
tions, a minor in Coach- not? seeml like much, Jbut with skill andjconfidence they are student athletes, team, it may have taken a
ing, and is currently work- the team plays every Tues- has tried out and ended up not athlete students;-. . . . couple of weeks, but the
ing on a Master's in Crimi- day, Thursday, and Satur- starting. Academics come first; teams hard work has paid
nal Justice? The answer: day, traveling for thirty- ^ ^
Skill and! confidence athletics come first. Eve- off. ?
Assistant Women's Volley- six of forty | games this must be mixed with other rything else comes last." The 'Hurst Lady hoot-
ball fCoach, Charles season. f ^ qualities. In the future, Fleet stresses, though, that ers scored a|4-2 win over
"Chuckie" Fleet. Fleet, who shares the Fleet sees the team grow- players mustf learn | to Bethany, with Jennifer
Fleet has fbeen offi- responsibility off recruit- ing. He foresees growth manage their time effec- Hart scoring a pair of
cially coaching the sport ing new team members, from ten players to|four- tively, for no garnet or goals along*with an assist.
of volleyball for the past looks for players who can teenfor sixteen. He also practice should be missed Tammie Ferguson and
four years, but his experi- sees growth in height, to study for a test, since Joanne* Connely each
handle pressure, under- added goals to help aidfin
ence goes back to his high stand the game, are will- from the present low of the players are being paid
school career when he H the win overfBethany.
ing to give their all to the 5'4 , to a whopping |5'10". to play. I l pThe Lady Lakers liked
coached a parochial team. sport, and are willing to Currently, some recruits Taking all of these
During thisfperiod, Fleet the winning feeling, so
learn. He stated, "I cannot being considered are over qualities into considera- much they went out and
has had the opportunity to stand an athlete who six feet tall. The height is tion, iFleetl stated that
observe the * Men's •, and thinks he or she tknows knocked off IUP^ 8-0 on
needed to compete against hopefully within the next Saturday. Hartjagain led
Women's Olympic Volley- everything. I| don't know taller opposing teams. two years, combining the
ball teamsrplay in person, everything . . . I continu- the way with three goals
Perhaps the mosr^im- current team and new and one? assist. Renee
listen to the* 1984 Men's ally try to learn and I want portant quality for team recruits, Mercyhurst
Olympic coach Doug Beil Dahlkemper added three
my team to continually try members is good academic Women's I Volleyball will goals, Charise Moore scor-
talk on the sport, and take to learn." standing. Under NCAA have earned an NCAA
part in conversations with ing twice, Sarah Marchini
IFleet believes in qual- standards, all that is re- championship. "That's and Stephanie Proukou
coaches from Penn State ity players. The players quired for|play*is,a 1.75 how confident I am of my
and East Strausburg. combined a goal {for the
not* only need skill, and GPA. But Fleet's philoso- kids," said Fleet.
shutout.
Korner from pg. 41
Athlete Of |As we approach the
The Week layout table, we see on the
left the musical ministra-
tions pouring out of the
bodacious BFR, turning
out such favorites as Bing
Crosby, Spinal Tap, and
one of my all time favor-
ites, THE PORK DUDES.
Moving around^, the
office, we observe a treat
for the| orbs - a RAMBO
Puzzle Solution BOP BAG. A • tenacious
(LastfWeek) tribute to a fine actor and
Jennifer Hart, a fresh- a gentleman - a mandibu-
man forward for the lar madman. •>
women's soccer team, was Turning slowly, we
named Mercyhurst's "Ath- then notice a jcolorful
lete of the Week" for Sep- caricature |of fRONALD
tember 28 fto October 5. REAGAN, Bonzo's buddy
Hart contributed to the 4- and mentor. He is even
2 victory over ^Bethany, marked with a Captain B.
scoring two (goals and an Careful orange X, signify-
assist. OnceSagain, on ing! danger and destruc-
Saturday Hart led the way tion) for the civilized
with three goals and one world. He's flying a Ku-
Laker spikers attempting a kill against Gannon. assist. 'The final Laker waiti flag...AND I DON'T
! Photo: Lisa McCUllan seore over IUP was 8-0. KNOWb WHY! 1 I