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spring 2007Volume IV, Issue III
hillsdale
the
forum
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Church
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Tuxedo
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Flowers
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Family
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Friends
[ ]
Ring
[ ]
Bride
THINGS TO FIND
FULLSTORYPAGE5
the crawler
spring 2007
2
it’s everything you ever needed to know...and some things you didn’t
March 2007 April 2007
For a flat rate of $3,000, in ad-dition to hotel and meal costs,cabbie Douglas Guldinez hasagreed to drive a New York couple to their new home inArizona.
*
At the Antwerp Zoo in Belgium,officals have urged visitors notto make eye contact with thechimps because it is “delayingthe social integration of animalsin the group.”
*
After trying to conceive for fiveyears, a Michigan couple hasturned to the Internet in seach of birth mothers. Where are theylooking? MySpace.
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Britain’s National Health Ser-vice recommends that medi-cal personnel no longer use theterms “mum” and “dad,” but“guardian,” in order not to con-fuse the children of gay parents.
*
The South Korean governmentagrees to provide students whocomplain of bullying with pri-vately funded bodyguards toand from school grounds.
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Students in California teamedup to increase their scores in up-coming state-wide tests. How?By dividing themselves racially,then urging one another to out-score the other groups.
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After being lost in a dense fog,two anti-whale activists wererescued by a whaling boat. Toshow their appreciation, the pair later approached the boatand hurled two cans of acid on board, injuring several crewmembers.
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Angelina Jolie, in an attempt toadopt a kid from every countryon Earth, added Pax Thein Jolieto her collection. Next month, check local list-ings for ESPN’s National Rock,Paper, Scissor tournament. Thewinner will take home $50,000and the title of a lifetime.
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In Sherdian, Wyoming, a wom-an is currently housing a goatin the backseat of her mini-van.Despite complaints, officials saythat as long as the car remainsclean, the animal can stay.
*
Just in case you needed proof that our society knows howto spend it’s money wisely, ananonymous music excutive re-cently purchased the diaries of Anna Nicole Smith at auctionfor over $50,000. Nearly one year after RosieO’Donnell set out to anger everyactivist on earth with her rant-ing and raving, she has decidedto leave
The View
in June.
*
Under pressure from Liberalswho find the Fox network bi-ased, Senators Hillary Clintonand Barack Obama both pub-licly refused to participate in atelevised Fox News debate
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Police arrested a man, who after escaping the day before, robbedthe same bank again the nextday.
by
Briana Mulder
The trial and conviction of Lewis “Scooter”Libby is among the most shameful moments inthe history of the American Judicial System. TheConstitution promises the right to a fair trial;Scooter Libby’s trial did not meet that standard.On July 6, 2003, Joseph Wilson, a former U.S. Ambassador, wrote an article in the
New York Times
accusing President Bush of misrepresenting intelligence reports to justifythe Iraqi war. Eight days after Wilson’sarticle was published, Robert Novak’s columnidentified Wilson’s wife, Valerie Plame, as aCIA operative. Novak cited two White Housesources, but refused to name them. Libby wasimmediately accused of leaking the informationto retaliate against Wilson, for his denouncementof the Bush Administration. Wilson alleged thatLibby read, and then illegally leaked classifiedCIA documents regarding Plame. Libbyclaimed members of the media informed himof Plame’s CIA status. In October 2005, Libbywas charged with lying regarding his role in thealleged Plame outing.This gives rise to the first problem. ValeriePlame was not a covert agent when Novak’sarticle was published. Thus, Robert Novak’s mention of Plame should have beenirrelevant. Instead, a witch-hunt ensued, inwhich the American people’s emotions wereused to create a vilification of Libby.The second problem is Richard Armitage,not Libby, was Robert Novak’s source. CIAspokesman Bill Harlow was Novak’s secondsource, confirming Armitage’s statementregarding Plame. Charges were never broughtagainst Richard Armitage or Bill Harlow. Thushow could Libby be sent to court on charges thatwere seemingly excusable in the case of other men?The third problem is the manner in which thetrial was conducted. During the trial, the jurywas never informed Plame was not covert whenher name was disclosed. If Plame wasn’t covert,revealing her identity wasn’t a crime. Nor was the jury made aware that Richard Armitage admittedrevealing Plame’s identity. Shortly after the trialended, jurors made public statements favoring a presidential pardon for Libby. Even if there had been significant grounds for the charges, the waythe trail was carried out makes one question theimpartiality of the American Justice System.In 2007, after having his name dragged throughthe mud, Libby was convicted on one count of obstruction justice, two counts of making falsestatements, and two counts of perjury. This iscurious. Wilson’s accusation results in Libby’sconviction on five counts. Why? It is speculatedthat Prosecutor Fitzgerald used Wilson toinflict maximum political damage to Bush’sWhite House and, perhaps, to enhance his owncareer. Libby could be sentenced to thirty yearsin prison, all because he was falsely accused of trying to discredit Wilson’s claims PresidentBush went to war in Iraq on insufficientevidence. Ironically, contrary to Wilson’sclaims, the evidence regarding Iraq was later proven to be valid. This calls into question allof Wilson’s claims, as he has obviously seemsto have little trouble in asserting falsifications.America prides itself on having a justicesystem that seeks the truth. In the case of Lewis“Scooter” Libby, the truth was known. Thetruth was pushed aside to make a spectacle of amember of the rival political party. Mr.. Libbyhas served America honorably and shouldreceive a full pardon. Such a pardon would be asmall step towards a return to the justice desired by the Founders for this free nation.
The Crash of “Scooter”
C a r t o o n c o u r t e s y o f U S B C I
Hillsdale
the forum
Emilia Huneke-Bergquist
Julie Robison
Editors-in-Chief
Samantha COnn
Business Editor
Mary Kate Cavazos
Subscription Manager
Brian JohnstonKate MartinStohn NishinoScott RozellG. Stolyarov II
Staff Writers
Anastasia EaleyThomas LeonardChristina MillerAnthony MocnyRoger PattisonHeather Shell
Contributing Writers
The Hillsdale Forum
is astudent publication distributedfour times throughout the schoolyear.
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photo courtesy of AP
Al Gore is prepared to fight anyone whorefuses to live green.
by
Anastasia Ealey
When one thinks of Al Gore, one doesnot think of peace-one may think of theClinton years,
An Inconvenient Truth
and embarrassing attempts at stealingthe Presidency, but rarely doesanyone think of peace. However,only a fewmonths ago, after winning an Oscar for his role in adocumentary onglobal warming,rumor has isthat he has been nominatedfor the NobelPeace Prize.Coincidence?As C.S. Lewiswrote, “If you believe that,you’ll believeanything.”Yet, what on the ever-toastier Earth doesglobal warming have to do with global peace? If anything, it leads to globaldespair. When people devote themselvesto the dogma of “being green” it is awonder they do not die from the stressof making sure that everything they dois green. Especially now, that, accordingto Matthew J. Traum of MIT, the U.S.Supreme Court has ruled 5-4 that carbondioxide (CO
2
) is an air pollutant subject tofederal regulation. Never mind that treesuse it to make breathable air, and humans breathe it out every time they exhale, it pollutes the Earth. So, if you want to bereally green, you have to cut down onhow much you’re exhaling because it’s polluting the environment. Did you justgasp at the news? That’s okay…just don’tlet it out.By advancing a supposedly scientificconsensus about the environment thathas everyone living like hippies and breathing less, Al Gore almost has a Nobel Peace Prize in the bag. However, if you ask him, it’s not easy being green— in fact, he apparently has no idea how todo it himself. According to the TennesseePublic Policy Center, his mansion near Nashville uses more electricity in a monththan a typical American home does in oneyear, not to mention the trip he recentlymade to the Nobel Prize Committeein Oslo. According to a
Reuters
articledated March 29, Goremade a prize-lobbyingtrip to address the NobelPeace Prize Committeeabout the dangers of global warming. Hegot a minute-longstanding ovation,and two heads of thecommittee made overlyfavorable comments onhim as a prizewinner. Nevertheless, did theystop to consider howmuch CO
2
he musthave emitted into theatmosphere on his tripto Oslo? Or how muchCO
2
he personally hasgenerated throughouthis career? In a Newsbusters.com article dated February20, Noel Sheppard did a write-up of SeanHannity’stake onAl Gore’s“carbonfootprint.”Apparently,when Mr.Gore wasVP andcampaigningfor the presidency,he used private jets tofly to manycampaigningsites, never caring that private jetsemit morecarbondioxide thancommercialairliners. On January 27th of 2000, Goremade an extensive trip through multiplestates via private jet, and chugged morethan 22,000 pounds of carbon dioxideinto the atmosphere. So not only is hisissue a questionable qualification for a peace prize, but he is not even adhering toit! Did you just gasp again? You can let itout this time. If even the prophet of man-made global warming doom isn’t walkingthe walk, why should anybody else?The broader question is whom in their right minds gives a hypocrite a peace prize for a practice that he doesn’t followand that doesn’t have anything to do with peace? The answer is, to Al Gore and the Noble Committee, like so many other liberals, the issue of man-made globalwarming is a religion. Many peopleeven remotely interested in science have pointed out that the cooling and warmingwe are experiencing are all naturalcycles in the Earth’s progression (anyoneremember El Nino or La Nina?). Belief in man-made global warming is likeany other false religious belief; the cold,hard facts are staring you in the face,and you stomp your foot and haughtilyexclaim, “This is what
I
believe, so itmust be right.” What is the difference,then, between Scientology and Globalwarming? Well…Scientology has TomCruise.In another ten years,when the world issizzling up and polar bears vie for beachumbrellas, willanyone look back atAl Gore and say “Ahyes; that man madeour world more peaceful?” Maybethey’ll be too busyholding their breathwhile arm-wrestlingeach other for bottlesof SPF fifty to protectagainst the gloweringsun, which will be an entertainingspectacle for the restof us gas-guzzling,heavy-breathing,non-Green Earthdestroyers. And that is the onlyInconvenient Truth on this planet.
photo courtesy of AP
Don’t worry America! We have Chuck Norris onour side.
The Earth, The Earth, The Earth is on Fi-yah!
okay...maybe not on fire, but according to Al Gore, it is gein’ hot in here
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