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Life in The Slow Lane, Volume II - by Joan E. Herlong

Life in The Slow Lane, Volume II - by Joan E. Herlong

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Published by william_herlong
Joan Herlong writes with verve and panache. Her “Life in the Slow Lane” is anything but slow. She grips us, her avid readers, with rapidfire wit and shakes up our view of mundane happenings. The ordinary is transformed with her comic and often wise perspective. After reading her columns, we never leave a Ladies Room without thinking of the waste basket placement (it should be close to the exit door); we would think twice before forsaking our hair stylist for another; we definitely reassess our relationships with bright, outspoken teen-age children, and look with fresh eyes at our own “Reason for Living.” In this collection of columns, we readers have a chance to revisit her brisk advice: Joan reminds us how to pass on compliments to friends instead of malicious gossip with TL (“Tell Last”), and send children to GO PLAY, not with Nintendo and computers, but with siblings, friends, and imagination.
Sue Lile Inman
Teacher, Writing-on-the-Spot workshop
Author, Voice Lessons and Miriam in the Wilderness

Joan Herlong is a shrewd observer with a gift for storytelling. In her hands, a subject as commonplace as dinner becomes a column worth reading. Her sense of humor is immutable, her barbs sharp, her compassion, when merited, deep. Like fellow Illinoisan Finley Peter Dunne she believes a newspaper’s role is to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable. These columns do just that.
Lyn Riddle
Editor, Community Journals newspapers
Joan Herlong writes with verve and panache. Her “Life in the Slow Lane” is anything but slow. She grips us, her avid readers, with rapidfire wit and shakes up our view of mundane happenings. The ordinary is transformed with her comic and often wise perspective. After reading her columns, we never leave a Ladies Room without thinking of the waste basket placement (it should be close to the exit door); we would think twice before forsaking our hair stylist for another; we definitely reassess our relationships with bright, outspoken teen-age children, and look with fresh eyes at our own “Reason for Living.” In this collection of columns, we readers have a chance to revisit her brisk advice: Joan reminds us how to pass on compliments to friends instead of malicious gossip with TL (“Tell Last”), and send children to GO PLAY, not with Nintendo and computers, but with siblings, friends, and imagination.
Sue Lile Inman
Teacher, Writing-on-the-Spot workshop
Author, Voice Lessons and Miriam in the Wilderness

Joan Herlong is a shrewd observer with a gift for storytelling. In her hands, a subject as commonplace as dinner becomes a column worth reading. Her sense of humor is immutable, her barbs sharp, her compassion, when merited, deep. Like fellow Illinoisan Finley Peter Dunne she believes a newspaper’s role is to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable. These columns do just that.
Lyn Riddle
Editor, Community Journals newspapers

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Published by: william_herlong on Sep 21, 2011
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01/17/2013

 
 
LIFE IN THE SLOW LANE
Collected Columns of Joan E. Herlong
Volume II
September 6, 2002 – April 30, 2009
 
iiWe would like to gratefully acknowledge the Community Journalnewspapers including the Greenville Journal where these columnswere originally printed from 2002-09. The Journal has always beena pleasure to work with.Individual columns copyrighted as printed, 2002-09, Joan E.Herlong, All Rights Reserved.Collection copyright, 2009, Joan E. Herlong, All Rights Reserved.
 
 
iii
CONTENTS
1.
 
My Dear Boy/Man .......................................................... 12.
 
Differenter ........................................................................ 43.
 
Keeping A Dedicated Line ............................................. 74.
 
Vote for Wifey ............................................................... 105.
 
Things I Didn’t Know They Needed .......................... 136.
 
Can’t Talk and ____ At the Same Time ...................... 167.
 
Gimme A Break Today ................................................. 198.
 
Vague Symptoms of Undetermined Cause ............... 229.
 
REAL Life In The Slow Lane ....................................... 2510.
 
Full Calendar ................................................................. 2811.
 
Meanest Moms Unite ................................................... 3112.
 
Worser Mean Moms ..................................................... 3513.
 
What Happens Next ..................................................... 3814.
 
Who Was That Masked Mom? .................................... 4115.
 
Not Safe With Scissors ................................................. 4416.
 
No ‘I’ In Shop ................................................................. 4717.
 
Odds On Moms ............................................................. 5018.
 
Pass It On ....................................................................... 5419.
 
Don’t Call It Love .......................................................... 5720.
 
One Of Those People .................................................... 6121.
 
A Few Tips ..................................................................... 6422.
 
Embedded Reporters At Camp Cake Eater .............. 6823.
 
Will You Hold For . . . ................................................... 72

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