(to the tune of
By Nan Reiner - 2011
Who‟s the one w
ho parses the
Vite every single week?He can make us laugh; he can make us groan.
who‟ll dissect every word
scatological bent,Spouting math
like a true psychopath:Jeff Contompasis!The pest
tweaking every contest With the tools
to exploit all the rulesNames a horse
with a spreadsheet, of course:Jeff Contompasis!
We knew there‟d be few as devoted as he
Who‟d write for the „Vite quite so passionately
.Or is it just OCD?
You could say he‟
s obsessive, emotionally regressive. A squire
penning biting satireOr buffoon
spewing stuff that‟s jejune
with his rapier wit:
The Loser who‟ll pass
some sweet laughing gasis Contompa----sis!The swain
with the off-color brain Won his town
the obscenity crown.
been engineered:Jeff Contompasis!