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Excerpt: Deliriously Happy by Larry Doyle

Excerpt: Deliriously Happy by Larry Doyle

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Published by EccoBooks
Do you like dogs? Babies? Baby dogs? Have you ever eaten ice cream of had love troubles? Wish there were dirty parts in The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this is the book for you.

Featuring writing from the New Yorker, Esquire, and National Lampoon, along with never-before-seen pieces only available here!

"[Doyle] is, as his credit suggests, wickedly funny." -New York Times Book Review

"If Earth ever needs an Interplanetary Humor Ambassador, Larry Doyle's the guy." -Washington Post
Do you like dogs? Babies? Baby dogs? Have you ever eaten ice cream of had love troubles? Wish there were dirty parts in The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this is the book for you.

Featuring writing from the New Yorker, Esquire, and National Lampoon, along with never-before-seen pieces only available here!

"[Doyle] is, as his credit suggests, wickedly funny." -New York Times Book Review

"If Earth ever needs an Interplanetary Humor Ambassador, Larry Doyle's the guy." -Washington Post

More info:

Publish date: Nov 8, 2011
Added to Scribd: Nov 04, 2011
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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11/04/2014

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[ 19 ]
Armchair father 
 When I came down or breakast that morning—Tursday morning—Dad was there in his chair in ront o the V roomV, asleep, or as it turned out, dead I guess. Tis wasn’t what you would call out o the ordinary, I mean him sleeping, except orthe act that the V was showing some Caliornia beach guys playing volleyball, which wasn’t one o Dad’s sports, though hehad been getting a lot less picky these last ew months. I remem-ber once I got up to get some juice or Coke to drink—it was prettlate—and Dad was in there in his chair, hal awake, watching a woman demonstrate how to turn your old dungarees into high-ashion designer jeans with something called a Gemm Gunn. And we have cable, so it wasn’t like it was the only thing on oranything.
 
[ 20 ]
larry Doye
 Anyway, I turned the V o on my way out to school, and when I got home it was back on, so the act that Dad was asleepagain wasn’t what you would call suspicious. But what was suspi-cious was that my sister Moll was in there, sitting on Dad’s lap, watching
Te Ping-Pong and Foamy Show 
. Tat was weird becauseDad hates puppets in the rst place, and especially weird in thesecond place because Dad had been pretty much a total grumpsince his unemployment ran out, and didn’t place a high priority on amily togetherness like he once did.—Hey, Roundbaby, you better hope he doesn’t wake up, Isaid to Molly. She put her nger to her lips, like to say 
shh
to me,but instead she had her nger turned the wrong way around, liketo button her own lip. She grabbed a hold o Dad’s old blue robeand cuddled up, pushing her head in close to his chest; then sheturned to me and stuck out her tongue. Kind o sick, now that Ithink about it aterward.I made Molly and me dinner, and then when Mom camehome rom work, I asked her i she wanted me to wake Dad up.(Mostly because my avorite show,
Operation: U.S.A.,
was about tostart and Dad reused to have it on i he was in the room.) But Mom just made that partway smile she sometimes makes.—Leave your ather alone, she said. He’s had a hard day.So I had to watch V upstairs on the dinky V, which sucked.Te next morning, which was Friday now, Dad was stillasleep in his chair in the V room, with the V blasting
Sea Mon-keys 
cartoons, which even Moll doesn’t watch. I was late or soc-cer practice, though, so I didn’t think about it too much until Igot back home and Dad was still asleep in the exact same posi-tion in the chair, watching
Chia Pet Adventures,
yet with Moll

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