Youthbeyondblue Fact sheet 15

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MANAGING SELF-HARM

COPING WITHOUT HARMING YOURSELF

If you feel like you want to harm yourself there are a number of things that you can do to distract yourself until the feelings become more manageable. If you can, make sure that you are around other people, and remove any sharp objects from the area. Put off harming yourself until youve spoken to someone else or waited for 15 minutes (and see if you can keep extending it for another 15 minutes beyond that). Write about your feelings in a journal. Go for a run or walk to use up excess energy. Play video games to distract yourself until the anxiety passes. Yell or sing at the top of your lungs on your own or to music do this into a pillow if you dont want other people to hear. Try a relaxation technique like yoga or meditation. Let yourself cry its a healthy and normal way to express your sadness or frustrations.

Some young people deliberately harm themselves, usually as a way to cope with difficult or painful feelings. Self-harm can take many forms, including cutting, burning or punching the body or picking skin or sores. These actions may provide temporary relief, but they dont do anything to solve the problem thats causing the feelings.
WHY DO PEOPLE SELF-HARM?
People who deliberately harm themselves have often had tough experiences in their lives. These might include being bullied or discriminated against, losing a loved one (such as a parent, brother, sister or friend), being physically or sexually abused, or breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend. Having a serious illness or disability, or problems with family, school or friends, can make you feel bad about yourself and, in some people, this can trigger self-harm.

Deliberate self-harm is often used as a way to cope with experiences and the strong feelings that go with them. For some people, self-harm provides a way to express difficult or hidden feelings, like anger, sadness, grief or hurt. For others, harming themselves provides a temporary sense of feeling when overwhelming emotions have left them numb or empty. Deliberate self-harm may also be a way of letting others know that you need support, when you cant use words or any other way to do so. It may be a way to prove to yourself that you are not invisible, or to show that you are in charge of your own life, feelings or body, especially if you feel as if other things in your life are out of control. Deliberate self-harm can bring an immediate sense of relief but it is only a temporary solution. It can cause scarring and permanent damage to your body, especially if you injure nerves. Psychologically, it may be associated with a sense of guilt, depression, self-hatred or low self-esteem, along with a tendency to isolate yourself from others. Deliberate self-harm can also become a habit thats difficult to break, so its important to get professional help.

Visit: Info line:

www.youthbeyondblue.com 1300 22 4636

beyondblue: the national depression initiative

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GETTING HELP
Although it may seem hard, its important that you reach out to someone who can help you work through the reasons why you are harming yourself and help you find healthier, more positive alternatives for alleviating the pain you feel inside. It may take time, but you can move to a happier and healthier outlook. Speaking to someone about your self-harm may be hard and its important that you trust that person. If theres a family member you feel comfortable telling, its likely that this person will already be worried about you and will be relieved at having the opportunity to listen and help. They can also support you to find a counsellor that is right for you. If you dont get a positive response, try to remember that its not because youve done something wrong, but because the person youve told may not understand much about deliberate self-harm and may not know how to respond. You could also talk to your General Practitioner (GP). You may need the help of a psychologist or psychiatrist, especially if you also have depression or anxiety. Like any relationship, building trust with your counsellor, psychologist or psychiatrist may take time and it helps to find someone you feel comfortable with. This may mean seeing several people before finding the one that you click with. If talking about it with someone is too overwhelming, an alternative is to email or write down what you want to say. Otherwise, a first step might be to talk to Lifeline (13 11 14) or Kids Help Line (1800 55 1800) both of which are anonymous 24-hour telephone counselling lines that wont appear on your phone bill.

People who are harming themselves and also have major depression may be at risk of suicide, and if they are they need urgent help. Consult a doctor, the emergency department of your local hospital or a mental health professional (like a psychologist or psychiatrist).

KEY POINTS TO REMEMBER

Self-harm is a symptom of underlying emotional distress. If you repeatedly self-harm, talking to someone can help you feel better and find other ways of coping. Some people are more likely to self-harm than others, including those who have experienced emotional, physical or sexual abuse, have a stressful and highly critical family environment, or have a mental illness such as depression. If you or a friend are harming yourselves, you need to take care of the injuries caused and if necessary, seek medical help through your GP or, if its serious, a hospital emergency department. Its also important to take care of yourself, and to eat well and exercise. These things help you to feel better about yourself, help you stay more stable and give you a better sense of well-being.

MORE INFORMATION AND SUPPORT

You can speak to trained counsellors by phoning these 24-hour telephone counselling services: Lifeline 13 11 14 (cost of a local call) Kids Help Line 1800 55 1800 (freecall) Information and support is also available from the following websites: beyondblue www.youthbeyondblue.com or www.beyondblue.org.au Information on depression, anxiety and how to help a friend

headspace www.headspace.org.au Information, support and help near you Reach Out! www.reachout.com.au Information and support for young people going through tough times The websites below can help you to find health services in your area. They list services that are either free of charge or low cost: Kids Help Line www.kidshelp.com.au Lifeline Service Finder www.lifeline.org.au/service_finder If you or a friend want to communicate with someone via email or online, Kids Help Line offers confidential, non-judgemental, emotional support 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Thanks to the Inspire Foundation for providing the information on this fact sheet (see the Deliberate Self-Harm information sheet on the Reach Out! website www.reachout.com.au).

SOURCES This fact sheet is based on information from:

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beyondblue www.youthbeyondblue.com or www.beyondblue.org.au n Reach Out! www.reachout.com.au First signs www.firstsigns.org.uk n Self-Injury & Related Issues (SIARI) www.siari.co.uk

Visit: Info line:

www.youthbeyondblue.com 1300 22 4636

06/09

beyondblue: the national depression initiative