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Bitten (Final Draft)

Bitten (Final Draft)

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Published by Greg Phipps

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Published by: Greg Phipps on Nov 26, 2011
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial


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INT. DAVE'S HOUSE, NIGHT.Dave is on the couch, watching TV.DAVE(laughing at joke on TV)Heh, politics.O.C., the doorbell rings, he gets up to get the door. Hewalks over to it and opens it, and sees Jim at the doorcovering his neck with his hand.DAVEJim! You're....20 minutes late!What gives, man?JIMI have a, uh, situation.DAVEYou pissed yourself? Jesus.JIMNo, I have a more serioussituation.DAVEYou shit yourself?JIMNo!DAVEYou murdered your girlfriend, andyou have her body in the trunk?JIMWhat? No, Jesus, I got bit, man.DAVEWhat kind of chicks are you fuckin'around with, man? Dude, you gottastay away from those Twilight fans.They're fucking crazy. LikeMormens.JIMI got bit by a fucking zombie, youfucking idiot!DAVE(suddenly concerned)Dude, you're bleeding a lot.JIMReally? I had no idea! Can I comein? It's fucking cold out here.DAVE
(snaps into the situation)Yeah, dude, come in.INT. DAVE'S KITCHEN, MINUTES LATERDave is getting gauze from the cabinet, and Jim is sittingat the table, bleeding.DAVEHey, try not to bleed on the tile,cleaning it up is a major bitch ofa chore.JIMCan you just find the gauze, andnot worry about the fucking floor?DAVEI'm looking... Christ!JIMWell hurry up! I could die here anysecond!DAVEYou'll be fine, man.JIMDon't you understand how thisworks? Human gets bit, human dies,turns into zombie, zombie bitesother human. It's an endless cycle.DAVEDon't tell me how zombies work,man. If anyone knows, it's probablyme.JIMI'm not doubting your knowledge ofthe zombie virus, I'm just sayingwe gotta get me to a fuckinghospital!DAVEYeah, that's a great idea, and riskstarting the actual zombiepandemic? You're talking about abuilding full of people with weakimmune systems as it is!JIMWell what other choice do we haveman? Look up a cure on the fuckinginternet?DAVEWell...CUT TO: INT. DAVE'S OFFICE, LATER
Dave types in 'how to get rid of a zombie bite' into theGoogle search bar. He clicks on the first link, and readsthe discussion.DAVEThis guy says Drano works best.JIMAre you serious?DAVEWell we have no other options! Nowlook, if you were bitten on yourarm or something, we could at leastamputate it! But you're bit on theneck motherfucker! Amputation ofyour neck is about as illogical ashaving a woman president!JIMWell....DAVEAnything you're about to say rightnow is gonna be bullshit.(shakeshead) Anyways, it's either applyDrano or die, man! So, what's itgonna be?JIMWell, I want to live, but--DAVEBut you don't know if Drano is aviable solution. Look, neither do Iman, but it's the only option wehave!JIMThis guy doesn't know what he'stalking about!DAVEIt's the official Zombie Fan ClubForum.JIMSo you're going to believe'ilovetehpussy6969lol'?DAVEI'm not the one who chose hisfucking username!JIM....Fine. Let's go.DAVEBy the way, where's your car?

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