KissandRide

IliveinBelgium.No,it’sok,reallyitis.Therearemanyhigh-speedconnectionsoutofthecountry,apointtheBelgiantouristboardemphasises,withimpressivepragmatism.Anyway,Ilikeit,sortof.Themedievalarchitecture,thechips,publictransport.ManythingscometomindwhenIthinkofBelgianpublictransport.There’sthetram’sinalienablerightofpriorityovereveryotherroaduser.Howwelaughaswewatchthetouristsjumpfree,outraged,cursingtheirchoiceofmini-breakdestination,asourricketyyellowheapofmetalspeedstowardsthem,ringingitstinnybell.Therearethebusbeerdrinkersat8amandthenthere’sthe“metro”,withits,erm,

eclectic

musicselection.There’ssomethingverypleasingaboutlisteningtotheDanceoftheSugarPlumFairyinaderelictgreycubeofastationfullofhobos,thescentofurineandwafflesfloatingheadilyinthewarmspringair.Recently,atchuckingouttimeattheEuropeanCommission(so,aboutmidday)themetrooperativeshavetakentoplayingtheCan-Cantofullplatformsofsombrebureaucrats,tryingtodiscussthefinerpointsoftheWorksDirective.Bestofall,though,isKiss&Ride.Kiss&Ride,whichrunsintheBrusselsMetrofreenewspaper,isBelgium’sMissedConnections:theforumwheresemi-literateBelgiancommutersposthaikuformpleasforloveintotheether.Itrarelydisappoints–it’sanamazingmixofromantic,bathetic,faintlyalarming.I’dloveitfortheplacenamesalone.I’vebeencollectingthemforafewmonthsandthesearemyfavourites.

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Elf

EversinceImetyouinBinchestationWednesdayon14July,Ican'tstopthinkingaboutyou,youareasbeautifulasanelf,blondehair,perfectgold.I'mimpatienttoseeyouagain.Ifyouwanttotalk,comeandfindme.Boris,theguywithblackandwhitebaseballcapandtheblackandblueshoes.

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Michel

.Michel,youaremyrayofsunshine.EverymorninginthetrainIwaitimpatientlytogettoBasseWavreinthehopeofseeingyou,hairinthewind,ontheplatform.Ajourneywithoutyouislikeachipwithoutmayonnaise.Thegirlonthetrain.

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Biro

IwasabletoadmireyouonmyroundtripfromWelkenraedttoLiegeonWednesday13th.ItriedtostartaconversationbyaskingyouforabirobutIthoughtyouweregoingtoattackme.

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Mouthspray

ThismorninginthetraintoLiege-Guillemins,leavingat7h29fromSaint-GhislainIspottedaveryprettygirlsittingontheendoftheseatopposite.Iwanttoapologisetoherforourremarksaboutthesmell,whichapparentlycamefromhermouthspray.Ididn'tknowthatwaswherethesmellwascomingfrom...

Swiffer

Icouldseeyourreflectioninthewindow;youweretravellingwithyournew

Swiffer.Getintouch,Seb.

Scouts

Maybeyou'llthinktolookinKiss&Ride.You,likeme,gotonatCentralStationandoffatBraineL’AlleudthisSunday28/02.Welookedateachotherandsmiled(thenoisyboyscouts,the"bizarre"Anderlechtsupporter,thelongwaitatRhodesStGenèse).Youwerewearingaleatherjacket,jeans,Converse.Ihadablackjacketandtrousers.Thenwewatchedaswewalkedawayfromeachotherwithoutswappingdetails.Maybeitisn'ttoolate?

Tall

Tall,Asianlookinglady,thankyouforbrighteningmydaybytakingthe529fromVerviers-CentraltoLiège.Yousleep,orpretendtosleep,andIwatchyou(weareastallaseachother),Idon'tmissthesmallestdetailofyourfigure,whichtemptsmeandawakesmysenses.Ilookforwardtoseeingyoutomorrow…andthereafter.

Butchers

YournameisLaure,youworkattheLouvainLaNeuvebutchersshopandyouhaveturnedmylifeupsidedown.IhaveneverbeenasobsessedbyagirlasIambyyou.Iwantnothingfromyou,IhavenothingtogiveandI'mscaredofwhatyoumightgiveme.I'llbehappytokeeponsmilingatyouwhenIcometogetmydailysandwich.

Tourist

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