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Having already established that men are basically lazy and entirely predictable, Iwas surprised to receive numerous e-mail queries from female readers of my blog.Apparently women are still trying to decode what they characterize as a mystifyingrange of behaviors among the men in their lives, and surprisingly; women arelosing sleep over this.As North American women seem bent on treating their male woes as an epicquest for “the perfect relationship”, I was struck by the fact that many of thequestions seemed to revolve around trying to understand why men can’t be more likewomen. Surely to God a man can simply open up and be honest about his hopes,dreams and aspirations, right? Why can’t he convey his emotional underpinnings andfinally disclose what’s going on in his heart of hearts rather than his gonads?Ladies, this isn’t rocket science. If you want to understand the reasons why menoften remain aloof when it comes to relationships, it’s not that difficult. Mostof your questions can be answered with five simple words: because we don’t thinkabout relationships.Believe it or not, men spend more time each day thinking about the best routehome from work at rush-hour than they do contemplating the nature of theirrelationship with women. For what reason you ask? Because that’s where the fridgeand television are located and you just happen to be one of the amenities in ourcave, that’s why. In short, it’s all about food, entertainment and sex -- that’swhat real men crave. The sooner you accept this genetic truth about men, theeasier your life will become. What’s that you ask? He was never like this when youwere dating? Why did he suddenly change?Ahhh the “c” word. He changed so much after I had sex with him. He changedonce we got married. He changed once we had kids. Everyone say it with meaningnow… change.The sad truth, ladies, is that men don’t change. We’re incapable of it. Sure wemanifested behaviors when we were dating you that no longer exist, but you have tounderstand that it had nothing to do with you personally and everything to do withacquiring you. Actually, it’s all about acquisition: whether it’s a new wide-screen TV, a motor home or a promotion at work, men alter their behaviors toacquire the things they don’t yet possess. It’s what motivates us. The primaryreason we’re not the same guy you met at the Starbucks in the mall is because wealready have you, and we’ve moved onto something else we want to obtain: it mightbe a bigger house, a higher income or a new car. Still not sure? Here are thequestions I’ve received. The answers are in italics -- glean away ladies. Dear Starbuck MacIntyre, I have a crush on my co-worker. He's really the drive behind out sales departmentand he’s unbelievably competitive to the point of being obnoxious if we don’t meetour targets. This bugs me because he’s not my boss, he’s just a co-worker and hemakes me feel like he’s my boss. It’s starting to impact how I am performing andsometimes I think he wants me to fail, as if he is trying to prove a point. At thesame time, he is really hot. I mean he dresses to kill, he’s got a sexy voice thatmakes me melt whenever I hear him making a deal on the phone and I’ll admit it: Imade a pass at him at lunch the other day. Now here’s my problem. I gave him aclear indication that I was interested and I totally flirted with him. He flirtedback and there was a definite air of sexual anticipation between us. Actually it’stwo questions. Am I wrong to be attracted to him and should I ask him out?
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