"Hey," he says to the guy in front of him, "Who does that guy think he is?""Oh, that's God," says the guy, "He likes to play billionaire."
Genie With A Catch
A guy found a bottle on the beach. He rubbed it and, sure enough, outpopped a genie."I will grant you three wishes," said the Genie. "But there's a catch." "Whatcatch?" he asked.The genie replied, "Every time you make a wish, every politician in the world will receive double what you asked for.""Well, I can live with that! No problem!" replied the elated man."What is your first wish?" asked the Genie. "Well, I've always wanted aFerrari," he said. POOF! A Ferrari appeared in front of the man. "Now,every politician in the world has two Ferraris," said the genie."Next wish?" "I'd love a billion dollars," replied the man. POOF! One billiondollars appeared at his feet. "Now, every politician in the world has two billion dollars," said the genie. "Well, that's okay, as long as I've got my billion," replied the man."What is your final wish?" asked the genie. The man thought long and hard,and finally said, "Well, you know, I've always wanted to donate a kidney."
VW v. Rolls Royce
A man from Texas, driving a Volkswagen Beetle, pulls up next to a billionaire in a Rolls Royce at a stop sign. Their windows are open and he yells at the billionaire, "Hey, you got a telephone in that Rolls?"The billionaire says, "Yes, of course I do."
"I got one too... see?” the Texan says.
"Uh, huh, yes, that's very nice.""You got a fax machine?" asks the Texan."Why, actually, yes, I do.""I do too! See? It's right here!" brags the Texan.The light is just about to turn green and the guy in the Volkswagen says,"So, do you have a double bed in back there?"The billionaire replies, "NO! Do you?"