The Essentialness of Essentiality

(The Air Is Thick In Here)

The Essential Basicness of

Essentiality
The Essentialness of Essentiality
The Essentiality of Essentialness
(The Air Is Thick In Here)

Written by (The Joe) Legend

Wednesday & Thursday January 23 & 24, 2002
2002-2006 Piemerica-Incorperated-Eternally

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 Contents

Page 1
Preface
Page 2
Chapter 1-
The Essentials of Essentiality
(carved up rose)
Page 3
Chapter 2-
Essentiality is not Dessential
(grifted two bowl)
Page 4
Chapter 3-
Questions
(See Preface)
Page 5
Chapter 4-
Is essentiality essential?
(No)
Page 6
Chapter 5-
True Essentiality
(rusty boxcar)
Page 7
Post Script
Page 8
Chapter + Z-
I'll Find a way
(sobbing lawn mower)
[outtakes]
Page 10
Credits

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 The Essential Basicness of
Essentiality
(The air is thick in here)
Preface

If I’m in a coma does it mean I have a

bad hair do & need to comba my hair?
Sentence by sentence the speechlessness
raves on. Who really has something to
say? Are my thoughts relevant? Is there
any point to reading hypothetical
questions? Essentially essentialness is not
mandatory but rewarded. Taking a
picture of a photo-graph truly boost self-
esteem. The lax of this is heard.

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 The Essentialness of Essentiality
(The air is thick in here)
Chapter 1-
The essentials of essentiality
(carved up rose)

First to understand the essentialness of

essentiality we must learn the essentials.
In order to achieve essentialness we
must earn it. There is always someone
crying out "watch my whisper & I will
earn a glimpse or two." I know this is
40% untrue, though some of you may
not know. The primary goal in essentiality
is basic and lets face it folks all cans
won't stay unopened forever. Because
most wasp nests contain wasps we must
realize wasps have wingers and stingers.
Knowing how to be essential is a very
refined technique. "Technique?" you say,
"Knowledge is not a technique. You sir
are an idiot. What kind of moron thinks
knowledge is a technique?" And so forth.
"Wait I'm not done jet." Oh yes you are!

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 The Essentiality of Essentialness
(The air is thick in here)
Chapter 2-
Essentiality is not dessential
(grifted two bowl)

According to most scholars desentialness

is "wavier than gravy," yet I say
'dessentialness is not essential."
Whenever a cat crawls out of its orchid &
sprays the thew? lawn dome... oops! I
mean knome. I bit my tongue. People
seem to think that dessentiality is an art
form. But as you know I totally dis and
then agree. When essentiality was
formed I taught my child that, because
desentiality went out of business last year
& essentiality replaced it, that does not
mean it was replaced by essentiality.
Some of the fakest famous people in the
world claim essentiality is nothing to
dessentiality. As far as I kan tell (bit my lip
again!)
These people are total & complete
morons & that's all I have to say about
that!

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 Chapter 3-
Questions
(see preface)

If I had bad breath would people say I

have a foul mouth? Is building a tree like
burning down a house? Can wishy washy
Hitasi stay in business? Can can openers
open bottles? Will I ever go to Florida on
a bus? Is Bruce Wayne really Spiderman
(editor: idiot Batman)
? If home owners insurance
insure a home what if the home owns
you? What do you mean there's 2
chapters left? What is going on? Whoever
wrote this is less interesting than a pile of
puke? Who would write an entire chapter
of questions? When is this gonna end?
Why don't I just get hit by a bus rather
than reading this? How come there is no
more advice on essentiality?

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 Chapter 4-
Is essentiality essential?
(No)

You may ask, although no one did in

chapter 3, Is essentiality essential? The
answer is no.

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 Chapter 5-
True essentiality
(rusty box car)

In any event essentiality is impossible to

attain and may not even exist. For the
most part this short book was about true
essentiality, which does exist & is so
possible it has to be done. But when you
look at it essentiality is useless so useless
in fact, because it is so necessary, that it
is not needed. Let me reverse myself, by
going forward. When you need
something so bad you cannot attain it
because you are born with it, essentiality.

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 Post Script

Ok let's begin. The basic way to

essentiality is forwarding newspapers to
Nentol's house. UPS is the primary
service to do this with. Basic essentiality
is very complex & advanced. The only
reason we said basic was because basic
is an abbreviation for the word basicness.
Few mortal beings realize that only a
couple of fresh boxes contain true
essentiality, NO MATTER WHAT THE
LABEL SAYS. Ok let's begin. Be basic.
Total essentialness is as a flowing
nightmare waiting to overflow under the
earth within caves. Be comblex(Speech
Impediment)
. Wash your fonts as much as
possible. In closing essentialness is not
mandatory but must be earned.
One line left to fill, please ignore this.

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 Chapter + Z-
I'll find a way
(sobbing lawn mower)
[out takes]

Most of. Land owning clods. Scissor

torture. Blind wind latened gentleness
costs a fortune but is recom p spected. A
final mob juiced me, too much. I said.
Bet little dome. I hope no one notices I'm
a moron (like them). Many of the most
important figures are most not many.
Climbing on & on, help me (sob!).
Quicker thicker & sicker. I wish all the
whales in the world would die (a terrible
terrible) death. I can't remember the last
time I was so essentially happy, oh yeah
what about the time I embezzled millions
of dollars to cut down those trees so I
can embezzle more. I used to go to the
store to get the essentials but people just
became so ugly & stupid I wanted to give
a bit too much savage beatings. What do
you mean I can't write this
"Those hobos are gonna eat those beans
I throw at them or I'll burn down the 3rd
hall in City Hall."?
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I say essential is to steal all the fire
extinguishers on earth, don't be essential.
I have to take out that line too, but this
book is just a bunch of crap, does it even
matter? Swing set door set. Rove. Just
hops along ties up cleans the stairs. Uh
book drink uh book uh de book drink uh
drink drink book uh de books. I know I'll
punish the readers even more by adding
the outtake chapter Z. I love erasing file
cabinets. Ingine on flow low android mix
up lacet bronze hit. All my almonds are
roll mon. So we've been sued by Jamaica
so what! Green.

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 The Essentialness of Essentiality
(The air is thick in here)
With Michael Aaron Reyes as (The Joe) Legend
2002-2006 Piemerica-Incorperated-Eternally

Preface Written:
Wednesday, January 23, 2002 11:47-11:54 A.M.

Chapter 1 Written:
Wednesday, January 23, 2002 11:55 A.M.-12:02 P.M.
12:39 P.M.

Chapter 2 Written:
Wednesday, January 23, 2002 12:41-12:53 P.M.

Chapter 3 Written:
Wednesday, January 23, 2002 12:58-1:02 P.M.,
2:20-2:25 P.M.

Chapters 4 & 5 Written:

Wednesday, January 23, 2002 2:25-2:33 P.M.

Post Script Written:

Thursday, January 24, 2002 11:34-11:43 A.M.

Chapter + Z Written:
Thursday, January 24, 2002 11:45 A.M.-12:04 P.M.

Main Front Cover Photo:

Taken June 30, 2005 Modified July 2, 2005
Cover Background Photo:
Taken October 24, 2004
Front Cover Created July 19, 2006
About the Author Written July 19, 2006
Back Cover Written August 2, 2006
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