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You Don't Have to Knock Somone's Brains Out

 
 
 
 
 
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Many disagreements happen because two people have different facts or evidence on which to base their opinions. Read on to learn how to avoid these situations.

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12/18/2006
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Builder over 2 years ago

Thank you for your well considered comments, ag.
However, I would like to chang eyour mind about what you said in your last paragraph. You were correct that the minds of children are malleable, especially at the hands of their parents.
However, since we know that, we can teach children what we want them to know and believe. The whole idea of education is to prepare children for lives as adults.
So teach them what is legally right and wrong, teach them facts about sex and diseases, teach them that there is always a way around a problem that is sticky because two opposing sides are intractable.
Never mind that we disagree on many things. We can teach kids what we agree about.
For example, the idea that we should not teach children about alcohol because it will encourage them to consume alcohol is not just wrong, but harmful. One in four high school students is at or near the point of alcoholism today.
Same with sex. Kids are going to have sex. It's part of our nature. So teach all of the facts, including STDs, cheating and lying, abuse, parenthood before they are ready, and so on. Teaching anatomy and the reproductive system is like a poor kid delivering newspapers to the houses of rich people.
I hope that everyone who reads this article reads your comment and takes it seriously. Thanks again.

ag over 2 years ago

I agree that, unfortunately, changing people's minds is often a slow and painstaking process. You mention that one reason can be "brainwashing", and I think that this actually the most common reason, and that more can be said of it.

In our world, there are really two kinds of disagreements. There are some disagreements that occur when the existing evidence is not sufficient to decide the issue, but which are nevertheless based on evidence. You can tell these sorts of disagreements, because they tend to move forward over time. At one point, the nature of light, whether it was wavelike or particlelike, was hotly contested. Now this no longer so - additional evidence came to light, and there is no longer any disagreement.

The other kind of disagreement is unfortunately not based on evidence, but tends to occur when a group of people have been "brainwashed" to believe something, despite overwhelming evidence contradicting it. Brainwashing of this sort almost always happens in childhood. It is well known that children tend to believe what they are told by their parents, especially if their parents believe it themselves. This makes a lot of sense from an evolutionary perspective: children who believed their parents not to eat untested red berries or swim in the crocodile infested river tended to survive better, and therefore as a species we are stuck with the unfortunate tendency of children to believe whatever comes out of their parents' mouthes. Beliefs formed in this way are unfortunately extremely hard to change, as our brains change fundamentally after childhood, crystallizing our view of the world at that time.

I obviously don't believe the solution to this is to go around knocking people out. Actually, I question who in the modern world does. But I do believe that this aspect of the human mind is immensely troubling and an impediment to the peace, harmony, and advancement of our world.