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The Return of Kilgore Trout and the Debt of the Children

The Return of Kilgore Trout and the Debt of the Children

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Published by Mike Dietzel
My Father Kilgore Trout ashes are stored in the dining room and his ghostly image starts to reappear with questions and some answers
My Father Kilgore Trout ashes are stored in the dining room and his ghostly image starts to reappear with questions and some answers

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Published by: Mike Dietzel on Feb 26, 2012
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial


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A ghostly modest proposal:
The Return of Kilgore Trout and the debt of the children.
“Well, it is payback time,” the voice of my Father said, KilgoreTrout. This is sort of unusual since my Father has been dead for over fourteenyears. I know this; since I saw him have a massive heart attack in front of meand kick the proverbial bucket. Normally, I am a skeptic to this type of things. However, the ghost thing, I believe since I witnessed it first hand acouple of times.You see. I saw my Grandmother walk down our hall after she died.She has now stopped that and no longer visits. I really do missher. One of the most loving, decent and kind relatives I ever had. However, there still is the ghost of my old man still showing upnow and then. My old man, is not one to be religious, but hisapparition may be caused by his ashes still being stored in thedining room closet. I was going to spread his ashes in his favorite RC modelflying field, but I remember all his broken promises, his drunkenness, andcheap side, so I left him the closet to get even with him. The old man appearsonce in while in a white cloudy image that is visible and faded, but talkative.He checks every couple of years and has been known to freak out thetwo cats. Pops was an animal lover, but the cats find it freaky to be petted by a ghost. They only settle down when he moves the catfood to them.The old man claims that he is limbo, but I thinking he is closer to hell thanhe realizes. He was a good man, didn't discriminate or cheat people, with theexclusion of his drinking problem, cheapness, and a wandering eye, or worseyet his wandering male organ. He wasn't a bad or evil man.
 Pop's claims he is some sort of star-trek limbo. With a science, he doesn'tfully understand that let's his atoms float around without the pain of hell or the pleasures of heaven. He is thinking that Heaven or Hell is all a myth andthat what he is experiencing is closer to reincarnation, but he does fear coming back as a cockroach. To quote the ghost,
“ my life wasn't that greaton earth to make me come back as a fucking bug.”
Dad's image was sitting on a chair in the dining room, so as not to scare myMother, as her age and health couldn't stand a vision of her disappointinghusband. I think Dad was also not ready for being sworn at or chastised for his wastrel previous life.“What's it like Dad, this other world?” “It's like going to view the neighbors' slide show, or I guess viewingsomebody's pictures on the face-book. You just see a lot of space and get tofloat around mainly back to your home town. Most people don't really knowyou're there. They are so busy now staring at their cell-phones. I fly aroundand then somehow I pixel-ate back to where you are buried or in my case back to the closet where you store my ashes. ”“Jesus, you couldn't have at least spread my ashes on a golf course or myfavorite radio control flying field.”My anger issues return, as Pops made a lot of promises to me as kid, andnot any of them actually materialized; he did teach me that life was usuallyone big friggin disappointment.“Ok, I understand. I wasn't the greatest Dad, but now it seemsto late, so just leave me in the closet until hell freezes over.”My fathers imagine being clear enough to make out his normal poutwhen he is either drunk or pissed off. So, I decide to change thesubject. “How the hell do you know about Facebook?"
For some background, my Father's failures as a writer forced himto take jobs that he thought he would like. With his love of all that futurecrap, and computer nonsense caused him to take a job as a computer operator, when the computer mainframe craze took off in the 1980s.This job did not live up to his Sci-Fi fantasies. He was highlydisappointed, then drunk and more dejected by reality. It did add a certainrealism to his work, as his sci-fi stories now had morehumans screwing things up then most other writers of the genre.Although he hated the job, he did say, he met a new class of weirdo, that he never thought existed until he worked with theTechies of his day.“Jesus, son, those people I worked with the most anti-socialfreaks who walked the earth, you would have been better trying tosocialize with Bonobos Chimpanzees.” Now, I hear the old man start hisnormal lecture on natural history, which normally would occur while he wasover-served himself his liquid of the gods, BEER.“You, know meatloaf, that the Bonoboos have a lower aggressionlevel than other chimpanzees, and they solve their problems bysex. Not a bad idea. Huh?”“Yes Dad, I have heard your previous drunk discussions onDarwin's cruel joke on the bible thumpers.”“Let's get back on topic Dad, are you using my Computer?”Dad now does have a sheepish guilty look on his faded features.“WELL, Dad it is like this the day I was going to spread your issues was theday Mom was sick so instead of floating in some damn field that willeventually be turned into condos. We put you back in the closet.” Pops now shakes his head which makes his image fade into view and out of view like some sort of weird magic trick. Pop's continues his grousing of technology.

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