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Sheen

Sheen

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Published by Ryan Sammartino

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Published by: Ryan Sammartino on Feb 27, 2012
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04/28/2012

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Ryan SammartinoSheenOver the course of the past few weeks, a man with a unique genetic makeup has beenstealing headlines, prime time interview spots, and the hearts of porn stars everywhere. The man,of course, is Charlie Sheen. The genes, according to Sheen himself in recent televised statements,include “tiger blood” and “Adonis DNA.”Perhaps it would be more fitting to approach understanding Charlie by firstacknowledging his actual genes. Sheen, born Carlos Estevez, is the youngest son of awardwinning actor Martin Sheen. He is the brother of Emilio, Ramon, and Renee Estevez, and theonly child to have eschewed his surname in favor of his father's stage name. Each of his siblingsare professional actors, a trade Sheen entered at the age of nine, when most kids were starting toenjoy sports and host sleep-overs . By the time he was twenty, Sheen has several major rolesunder his belt and was considered an extremely promising young actor.Throughout his career, Sheen was frequently cast as “bad boy” characters, a role mirroredin his personal life for years. Though it became clear early on that Sheen's personality would prevent him from handling his fame and financial success well, nothing could prepare the publicfor his internet-shattering meltdown in the first quarter of 2011. He showed an affinity for  prostitutes and call girls beginning in the '90s, around which time he also revealed a penchant for spousal abuse and “accidental” violence, likely due to his developing drug habits. In that samedecade, Sheen still had time to begin and end a one year marriage, overdose on cocaine, andviolate the terms of his probation.In 2003, a year after Sheen began his second marriage, Warner Brothers ignored allwarning signs and cast Sheen to essentially play himself in the sitcom
Two and a Half Men
. The
 
sitcom became an incredible success, due largely to Charlie's ability to effortlessly portray adegenerate wise-cracking sex addict who may or may not have posed serious danger to themembers of his nuclear family. Soon, Sheen was the highest payed actor in television history,earning in excess of $1 million dollars per 22 minute episode—a useful sum for a man whoseexpenses famously included drug abuse and the company of escorts.But Charlie managed to keep things under control for several years. Sure, his second wifefiled for divorce in 2005 amidst claims of his alcoholism, drug addiction, and threats of violence.And there was a third marriage, an arrest, a felony charge, a misdemeanor plea, rehab, probation,and anger management classes. By November of 2010, though, Sheen began the process of freeing himself from his third wife and was on top of the world. Fans on the internet raved abouthis carefree lifestyle, calling him a “bro legend,” “party god,” and “true American hero.”When 2011 rolled around, things started to get out of hand, even by Charlie's alreadyludicrous standards. At the end of January, Sheen was hospitalized for severe, drug and alcoholrelated “abdominal pains.” Prior to the hospitalization, Sheen had gone “missing” before it wasreported that he had locked himself in a hotel room for several days with almost nothing other than cocaine, alcohol, and a few porn stars. Upon release from the hospital, Sheen began rehab inhis home and CBS announced that
Two and a Half Men
, still Sheen's primary cash cow, was postponed indefinitely. Shortly thereafter, CBS canceled the current season entirely.Around this time, it seems, Charlie rolled out of bed and went on the internet for the firsttime in years and realized the incredible publicity that his antics had been generating. Never oneto shy away from press, Sheen took to the talk show circuit. Dozens of excerpts from theinterviews that followed have become popular quotes, blowing up Facebook feeds, sparkingmemes, and generating twitter hashtags. However, Sheen also made the most costly slip of his
 
 professional career. On a late February radio broadcast, Sheen directed several scathing remarkstowards
Two and a Half Men
creator Chuck Lorre. During the broadcast, Sheen frequentlyreferred to Lorre as Chaim Levine and blasted him for using a “Hollywood name,” appearing toimply that Lorre was hiding his Jewish heritage. Lorre's real last name is in fact Levine.However, his birth name is also Charles. Sheen referred to him as “Chaim” (the hebrewequivalent of Charles) in much the same way a racially intolerant or ignorant person might refer to a Latino named George as “Jorge.”Though Charlie made many statements that were crazier or more incoherent, bashing hisshow's creator was apparently the last straw for Warner Brothers and CBS. Before the studiocould take action, though, Sheen had time to publicly demand a 50% raise, which would bringhis salary to roughly $3 million per episode. It's unlikely that Warner Bros ever consideredmeeting this demand, as they fired Sheen about a week later.Stripped of his ability to earn almost $2 million for a few days of being himself oncamera, Sheen returned to his newfound cash cow in hopes of overstaying his welcome onalmost every interview show known to man. Within a few more appearances, America realizedthey had been wrong about Charlie all along. It turns out Sheen is far crazier than anyone couldhave possibly anticipated.When asked by several interviewers how he was handling his rehab, Charlie declared thathe was completely sober. He assured anyone who would listen that Alcoholics Anonymous is awaste of time and effort, and that he had defeated his addictions with a much more effectivemethod. Rather than using traditional rehab, Sheen cured himself “with his mind.” He simply“closed his eyes” and his “disease” was gone. When a skeptical interviewer questioned thelegitimacy of Sheen's claims, Charlie was prepared to fire back with his new slogan. He

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