7 Habits Of Highly Effective People

Stephen R. Covey

The Maturity Continuum

Developing Habits

Character and Personality

Personality

Character

Three-Person Teaching
First Person
Share

Second Person

Share

Third Person

Shares Knowledge

Capture, expand, apply

Receives added-value knowledge

Principles
Principles Natural laws or fundamental truths
Universal, timeless Produce predictable outcomes External to ourselves Operate with or without understanding or acceptance Self-evident and enabling when understood

Values
Values
The worth or priority we place, things,

ideas, or principles
Self-chosen beliefs and ideals Internal, subjective, based on how we see the world Influenced by upbringing, society, and personal reflection

We are not in control, principles control. We control our actions, but the consequences that flow from these actions are controlled by principles.
-Stephen R. Covey

Paradigms
Paradigms The way an individual perceives, understands, and interprets the surrounding world; a mental map.
If you want small changes, work on your behavior; if you want quantum-leap changes, work on your paradigms.
-Stephen R. Covey

P/PC Balance
The Principle of Effectiveness

Production
The desired results produced (the golden egg, or P)

Production Capability
Maintaining and enhancing the resources of the desired results (the goose, or PC)

Emotional Bank account

Emotional Bank Account
It is a metaphor for the amount of trust that exists in a relationship. Every interaction with another human being may be classified as a deposit or withdrawal.

Deposits
Kindness and Courtesy Keeping Promises Honoring Expectations Loyalty to the Absence Making Apologies

Withdrawals
Unkindness and Discourtesy Breaking Promises Violating Expectations Disloyalty, Duplicity Pride, Conceit, Arrogance

Habit 1

Be Proactive
The Habit of Personal Vision

Responding according to Values

Proactive Person
Responding according to values Accepting Responsibility Focusing on their circle of Influence

Reactive Behavior
Stimulus Response

Proactive Behavior
Stimulus Freedom to choose according to Values Response

Circle of Influence
Circle of Influence
A persons Circle of Influence includes those things he or she can affect directly.

Circle of Concern

Circle of Concern
A persons Circle of Concern comprises all matters about which he or she cares.

Circle of Influence

Transition Figure
Transition Figure
A person who stops the transmission of negative behaviors to others.

Any time you think the problem is out there, that very thought is the problem.
-Stephen R. Covey

Habit 2

Begin with the End in Mind

The Habit of Personal Leadership

Mental Creation Physical Creation

First Creation
The mental thought and plan for desired results

Second Creation
The physical production of desired results

Habit 1 says you are the programmer. Habit 2 says write the program.

Choosing a Life Center

Family
Spouse

Money
Possessions

Self

Work

Religious Organization Enemy Friend

Pleasure

Personal Mission Statement

Mission Statement

A powerful document that expresses your personal sense of purpose and meaning in life; it acts as a governing constitution by which you evaluate decisions and choose behaviors.

Personal Mission Statements

Benefits of a Personal Mission Statement
Encourages you to think deeply about your life Helps you examine your innermost thoughts and feelings Clarifies what is really important for you Expands your perspective Imprints self-determined values and purposes firmly in your mind Provides direction and commitment to values Enables you to make daily progress toward long-term goals Provides the first or mental creation of your desired results for your life

Personal Mission Statements

The process of writing a mission statement involves answering a series of questions:
What things do I want to have that I feel are important? What am I about?

What are the qualities of character I would like

to emulate? What legacy do I want to leave?

Sample Mission Statements

Our Mission
The mission of our families to create a nurturing place of order, love,

happiness, and relaxation, and to

provide opportunities for each person to become responsibly independent, in order to achieve worthwhile purposes.

Habit 3

Put First Things First

The Habit of Personal Management

The Management Matrix

URGENT IMPORTANT
Crises Pressing Problems Deadline-Driven

NOT URGENT
Preparation Prevention Values Clarification Planning Relationship Building True Re-Creation Empowerment Trivia, busywork Some telephone calls Time wasters Escape Activities Irrelevant mail Excessive TV

NOT IMPORTANT

Interruptions, some telephone calls Some mail, some reports Some meetings Many proximate, pressing matters Many popular activities

The Six-Step Process

1 Connect to Mission

6 Evaluate

2 Review Roles

5 Exercise Integrity

3 Identify Goals

4 Organize Weekly

Habit 4

Think Win-Win
The Habit of Interpersonal Leadership

Six Paradigms of Human Interaction

Win-Win
Seeks mutual benefits Cooperative, not competitive Listens more, Stays in communication longer, and communicates with more courage

Win-Lose
Is very common scripting for most people Is the authoritarian approach Uses position,power, credentials, possessions, or personality to get thewin

Six Paradigms of Human Interaction

Lose-Win
Voices no standards, no demands, no expectations of anyone else Is quick to please or appease Buries a lot of feelings

Lose-Lose
Is the mind set of a highly dependant person Is the same as no win because nobody benefits Is a long-term of win-lose, lose-win, or win

Six Paradigms of Human Interaction

Win
Is self-centered Thinks me first Doesnt really care if the other person wins or loses Has a Scarcity Mentality

Win-Win or No Deal
Allows each party to say no Is the most realistic at the beginning of a relationship or a business deal Is the highest form of win

Four Dimensions of Win-Win

Character

Relationship

Agreements

Systems and Processes

Win-Win Character
Integrity
People of integrity are true of their feelings, values, and commitments.

Maturity
Mature people express their ideas and feelings with courage and with consideration for the ideas and feelings of others.

Abundance Mentality
People with an Abundance Mentality believe that there is plenty for everyone.

Habit 5

Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood

The Habit of Empathic Communication

Levels of Listening
Ignoring Making no effort to listen

Pretend Listening Making believe or giving the appearance you are listening
Selective Listening Hearing only the part of the conversation that interests you Attentive Listening Paying attention and focusing on what the speaker says and comparing that to your own experiences Empathic Listening Listening and responding with heart and mind to understand the speakers words, intent, and feelings

Autobiographical Responses
Are the main obstacles for effective interpersonal communication

Advising

Giving counsel, advice, and solutions to problems

Probing

Asking questions from our own frame of reference or agenda

Interpreting

Explaining anothers motive and behaviour based on our own experiences; trying to figure people out.

Evaluating

Judging or either agreeing or disagreeing

The Attitude and Skills of Empathy

Words we use
7% Non verbals, Body Language 55% 38%

How we say words, Sounds we make

Habit 6

Synergize
The Habit of Creative Cooperation

The Process of Synergizing

Synergy
The whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Synergy takes place when two or more people produce more together than the sum of what they could have produced separately.

The Process of Synergizing

To synergize is
Results oriented, positive synergy Examining, exploring, seeking diverse perspectives to alter or complete your paradigm Cooperating Having a mutually agreed-upon end in mind Worth the effort and highly affective

To synergize is not
A brainstorming free-for-all Accepting others ideas as full truth Win-lose competition Group think Always easy Only a negotiation technique

A process

Creating The Third Alternative

Communicate Listen Express Other Needs

Your Needs

Third Alternative

The Perspective of Humility

We are not in effective have the People who are truly control, principles control. recognize their humility and reverence to We control own perceptual limitations and to our actions, but the appreciate the rich resources available consequences that flow from through interaction with the hearts and these actions are controlled by minds of other human beings. principles.
-Stephen R. Covey -Stephen R. Covey

Habit 7

Sharpen the Saw

The Habit of Renewal

Four Dimensions of Renewal

Physical
We build Physical wellness through proper nutrition, exercise, rest, and stress management.

Mental

We increase mental capacity through reading, writing, and thinking.

Spiritual

We develop spiritually through reading inspiring literature, through meditating and praying, and through spending time in nature

Social/Emotional

We mature socially and emotionally by making consistent deposits in the Emotional Bank account

The Upward Spiral

Progress has not followed a straight ascending line, but a

spiral with rhythms of progress and retrogression, of evolution and dissolution. -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Principle-Centered Living
Security

Family Spouse

Money

Possessions

Power

Self

Principles

Work

Guidance

Religious Organization Enemy Friend

Pleasure

Wisdom