THE KENNEDYS WERE PUSSIES
How One Family Consolidated Enough Power to Overthrow America
Ever wonder how a dumbass gets elected President? Or if it's just a neat coincidence thatthe President's Daddy also used to hold the highest office in the land? Or if it's just a really,really neat coincidence that the dumbass President, whose Daddy was also once President,has a brother who's Governor of Florida, and is rumored to be favored in the 2008Presidential "election"? Or just how, exactly, does a guy with supposedly no experience inprofessional intelligence gathering get hired as Director of the CIA? Huh? Ever wonder stuff like that?
Ever think about why, when you're caught doing 48 in a 35, and everyone else is going thesame speed, and the cop ignores your lame excuses and hands you a ticket anyway, thePresident's daughters get away with drinking under age, again and again and again? Or whythe Governor's daughter (you know, the niece of the President) gets busted for drugs, againand again and again, and is able to make good on her infractions with some rehab and alittle community service? Hmm?
Okay, so maybe you've thought about that stuff, but it didn't seem like a big deal to you atthe time. Maybe you've got a lot on your mind these days, what with the superb offerings of our fine television broadcasting companies, and how Renee Zellweger is gaining all thatweight for that movie and whatnot. Or maybe you've been drunk a lot lately. So how 'boutthis - ever wonder who was involved with the financing of the Third Reich, the Bay of Pigsinvasion, the JFK assassination, Watergate, the CIA's history of narcotics trafficking, ManuelNoriega, the Iran-Contra affair, the 2000 Florida elections scandal, the attacks onSeptember 11th, the war in Afghanistan, the war in Iraq, the ongoing war on terror andmost every major economic, political and military policy in this country for the last 70years? Ever wonder about all that?
It's only a conspiracy theory until Wolf Blitzer says so. In the meantime, why not getcreative and stage your own "news broadcast"? Mousse your hair and put on a shitload of make-up, sit at the kitchen table like you know what you're talking about and READ. Primetime will never seem the same.
Reader. Librarian. Cyborg.
On the evening of 6 November 1963, two days after her 17th birthday, Laura Welchfailed to stop her Chevy sedan at a stop sign and drove into a Corvair being driven by herthen-boyfriend, Michael Douglas, also 17. Laura and her passenger, Judy Dykes [snicker],were treated for minor injuries at a nearby hospital, where they learned that Douglas haddied from his injuries in the collision. No police charges were filed, apparently, but therecord is unclear. Now Laura Welch is married to George W. Bush and is known around theworld as Laura Bush, the first lidless First Lady.
Nothing else really happened in Laura's life worth mentioning outside the pages of Redbook.She studied at Southern Methodist University as an undergrad, so from what we know of George's college days, they were complete opposites from the beginning. She went on to bea teacher, librarian and lover of books, so, again, not much in the way of intellectualcompatibility with her future husband. However, they got married the same year they met,which makes you wonder: did she get knocked up early on, and they tied the knot to cover