The same as resistance but adding either blame, return criticism oravoiding the issue.
Actively ignoring your pa
rtner when they’re talking to you either by
leaving the room or turning head or eyes away (more than just distraction; an obviousact of rejection).
Arguing isn’t effective communication. It isn’t necessarily bad or even a
predictor of divorce
; it’s just not good communication. It’s usually laced with
defensiveness and criticism.
5. Listening through filters
We all have filters (intoxication, being too tired,
emotionally triggered, etc.). The problem is when we don’t recognize or acknowledge
them. Once acknowledged, we have a choice on how to respond. See below for moreinformation on filters.
6. Being indirect/unclear
Human beings can get into the bad habit of being reallyunclear when they communicate. We drop a hint and hope our partners pick up on it. Ifyou want something done or heard, be very clear and specific.
7. Being Critical/Harsh/Name calling
This sounds like obvious bad communication
but it’s labeled in our minds as things like: “It’s just how I
or “I was just mad.” But
the damage of criticism, name calling or being harsh runs deep and too much of it canreally destroy trust, closeness and respect in a relationship.
What is Good Communication?
Good communication is more subtle than bad communication. We often feel like a
conversation went well but we don’t necessarily know why or, really, we don’t care;we’re just happy it did.
This is the act of acknowledging what your partner is saying by nodding,
making soothing sounds or saying things like “I can see why you feel that way” or “Youreally have a good point.”