Welcome to Scribd, the world's digital library. Read, publish, and share books and documents. See more
Standard view
Full view
of .
Look up keyword
Like this
0 of .
Results for:
No results containing your search query
P. 1
The Evolutionary Stages of Consciousness

The Evolutionary Stages of Consciousness

Ratings: (0)|Views: 117|Likes:
Published by dadwhiskers
An exposition about the evolutionary stages of consciousness, written by an enlightened American Yogi who spent the last years of his life living in a cave in the Himalayas.
An exposition about the evolutionary stages of consciousness, written by an enlightened American Yogi who spent the last years of his life living in a cave in the Himalayas.

More info:

Published by: dadwhiskers on Apr 14, 2012
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial


Read on Scribd mobile: iPhone, iPad and Android.
download as PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd
See more
See less





By The Deathless Master,
Satgurudeva Mahavatar Babaji
I have known Swamiji for many of his incarnations now, and can personally testifythat he is the most pathetic and absolutely worthless excuse for a disciple I have ever had,and I’ve been around for a really long time! I well remember that dark and dismal daywhen he first appeared, with his ghetto-blaster and collection of heavy-metal rock androll CD’s, at my secluded hermitage nestled far above an opalescent lake (where Iwindsurf on weekends) that is fed by rainbowed waterfalls, high in the Indian Himalaya beyond Badrinath. It was here in my cave that I attained
 soruba samadhi
, the state of  physical immortality, at the age of sixteen. When he requested that I initiate him into theancient Swami Order, I had to muster all of my powers of yogic self-control in order torefrain myself from throwing him off the nearest cliff, or simply dematerializing him.Anyways, against my will (“Thy will be done!” – You know I’ve got to stop doing that
; they really crucified a good buddy of mine, J.C., a hip dude from Israel, for usingit.), I bestowed
on Swamiji and gave him the monastic name of 
,which means “the bliss of ignorance.” His favorite saying to this day is “What you don’tknow won’t hurt you.”The unpretentious title to Swamiji’s new book – 
 All the Secrets of the Universe and  Beyond 
 – is quite appropriate. They will
be secrets after you finish perusing thisextremely incoherent and confusing treatise; perhaps the worst ever drafted throughoutall of the countless
 Kali Yugas
, or Dark Ages. I simply couldn’t wait to stop reading andto put it down! In keeping with my vow of 
, or truthfulness, I cannot recommendthis book to anyone except politicians, like George W. Bushwhacker, who are alreadyutterly confused anyways. Hopefully it will keep them distracted for a while duringwhich they won’t be able to muck things up any further.In closing I will quote another one of my disciples, Swami Beyondananda who at leasthas a sense of humor – “The only thing I don’t like about my higher self is that it’salways getting high without me!” For all of you who can relate to these words, but are tooapathetic to do anything about it, I would suggest his easy-to-read, short and concise
The Lazy Man’s Guide to Enlightenment.
In the year 306 of the ascending
 Dwapara Yuga
, or Electrical Age

Activity (9)

You've already reviewed this. Edit your review.
1 hundred reads
Anadi Gupta liked this
Roy Melvyn liked this
zaheer786110 liked this
Deshpandem liked this
Christian Fisher liked this
pramod454992 liked this
pramod454992 liked this
HeavenlyAlchemy liked this

You're Reading a Free Preview

/*********** DO NOT ALTER ANYTHING BELOW THIS LINE ! ************/ var s_code=s.t();if(s_code)document.write(s_code)//-->