MITTEN. STRINGS FoR ~~ GoD SIMPLICITY KATRiWA KEN/so/f/ the came age as mine. When I arrive, she is just cleaning up after an afer, on of ling wth eso ad he ee aan matepiee pein eee ih cel took des and wax In ation, they hve nie nerd ap. brian hiner cg and mated ap ee cndeed fom 3 xl. Some ofthe ea Rete on Of flower and Buns Other hae been Hes ove with vegetable de, nd sane ans bs Ea oa tal growing gras, phen Mach ht teal ah speak for atc ectond While the chile ea cue ply my end sweep ptr ff the foo cru teal el he Swpricrry 35, Paintbrashes. The results of their labors ate breathtaking, and L ooh and ahh over every epg. They sre beaut. But she confesses with a sigh, she has dane most of them herself ‘The Ukranian kit proved too complicated for the kd, and We stencils were difficult to do, The chien each made + couple of litter eggs, but they ended up with glue all over ‘heir hands and soon lost interest. "Next year” my frend. ‘395, laughing, “we'e going hack to the basic 82.99 ki fom cevse | think of those Easter eggs now as I set out to write about simplicity. So often, i sem, we are the ones who, ‘make our ovin lives more complicated than they need to be ‘We set the bar coo high, take on too much, turn small do ings ino big ones. In part the culture isto blame—as cach holiday rll around, we conffont at ever-expanding array ‘of merchandise too with it. There i more 9 se, more to 4d, more to buy, than ever before. And how easy itis ofall ‘wo thinking that Fiving well means pattaking of all chats offered. With so many options and opporgunites to choose fiom, it can bea challenge jus figuring out where to draw the line Why settle for food coloring and vinegar when you ean rate an artistic treasure instead? Why stop at birthday cake and ice cream at home when you can rent an indoor play ground and invite the whole claw? Why spend the Saturday ‘before Christmas lding withthe fly when you coule all be atening the annual downtowen holiday exttavaganea? Why indeed? The face is, the marketers ofthis world have gotten very good at thinking of new ways to eeate de46 sires for goouls and services and experiences that did't even exis a generation ago. As a resul, we end up offering 00 ‘much to our children and tking on too much ourselves. eis not enough, anymore, to pall together a Halloween costume fom the desu hin, add few extra touches, and Inead ut the door to go tick-or-treating, The store-bought contumes are more elaborate, more expensive, and more svn every yar. There are decorations to buy ight shows to orchestrate on the font lawn, hated houses vst, and 2 week’ worth of pre-Halloween activities to attend, Lae fll in neighbor’ six-year-old daughter had been in and out of Ine costume so many tes chat she refed to put it back on for Halloween night. She'd been a ballerina in pata, at school, and at wo parties. The novelty had worn off [know a ile boy who pitched 2 tantrum at the end of an elaborate birthday party because his goody bag did't have enough treats in it. At another, children yrambled on. all fours to pick up candy seatered from 3 pies and then procested because there wast enough. Over the past couple ‘of years, my boys have atended birthdays featuring pony rides, a vst fom Batman, ld animals, indoor rock climb ‘ng. gymnastics, and an infated space jump, tented hy the thou ve seen overexcited kid fll part and more than one exhausted mother weeping in the kitchen Awspurcitys 37. WW message do our own excesses send to our chien? In our ffs to create spec oceans for hem ew loin sigh of wht ely porte? Are these abort rodutions cowedng ot the Kind fs ple, heart elcbaions tat uly enrich our ves and de- Tih or chile? how weeks ago, 2 wel-known orytllr came 0 our sow made the pln ck a end would havea ey dinner tour owt, and then we would enjoy an evening of Stories downtown, We at at ve hry, banded into boots dnd incon and set On downpour. The Hay net ingroom wil of we, ier chien ng in ae from two thier tu autince athe bes of ies. Batch wat sich, mothers were worn ct and Beda gle and the cen were rlicking with ent | hoped that our torteling celebrity would dim the horescent light pte he cide into a il bring a ho the crowed oom, But seemed, te mood ws alendy find eat wis what he played t,wlehing 4 rrrene of toices amc. andmperonations nan eff ote the Jenin oft catered group. “How come no one iststening?” whispered Jick “1 ehink its pst my bedtime” confided four-year-old Nickts ‘And 1 had co ask myself; What on earth are we doing here? OF course, hindsight is ey. But had 1 brought aie ‘more thought co our agends that evening, Hwa have e- sized that these two small children did noe require an out ing im one to experience something special. How much hetter off we would hae heen staying home on that stormy night, lighting a fre in dhe Fireplace, and inviting Jack’ Friend for dinner and a story told by frelighe in our own iv- ing room, Once agin I was reminded: IF | pause long ‘enough to listen to my own inner voice, athe chan heeding some external call go, see, and do, I make beter choices For all. Tetakes conviction tay, “This is enough"—whether ie he enough holiday events, enough guess at a party enough resents, oF simply enough activities for next Saurdy, And cis hard t fel confidence non own choices, in our oven sense of limis, when everyone around us seems convinced ‘that more and bigger i beter. Bue fam learning. When [find myself worrying, Can pull this whole thing of instead of looking forward to a special day. 1 know i hecause Ihave allowed an event t, bhecomte more extravagant and ambitions than t needs to be. ‘There is another way. We don't have to make everything ino such a big deal. We ean choose simplicity over compli- ‘ation, And what reli there isin simplicity Here’ a tar ~~ Dovenscale holiday celebrations. Keep the focus ‘on family on meaning seule and tations, fimpurenry 39 and on simple activities. Give fewer gifs, and tke more time to enjoy them. One year we bought CCaristmas presents fr a needy family and agreed that we would pay for chose gifs by saline down our own giving to one git per person. No one Flt deprived: in fact, I chink weal fee relieved. When ask my children what they love most about out Chrismas, their answers remind me chat simple realy is hes: eading our Christmas books, the ad- ‘ent calendar, om anna carol sng ith che Fam- ily nexe doo, lighting the ting-2-ling on Christmas Eve We Seta limit on holiday acvities. (One Easter eng hunts enought) ~ Don't ee guilty aboue skipping events hat every- ‘one eke atends. Your children need you and your attention, not more atviies Last year we didnt go to the end-of-the-year barbecue and pool party for Henry’ second-grade class—simply because swe needed a quiet family day more than we needed one more end-of school event, As re- ‘mind my chien when the birthday patty vie tions star to pile up, “You don'rhave to goto everything” Watching us manage our own lives sensibly, our cidren wil learnt ser limits, too 2 Celebrate birthdays in away that honors the qual- ties you love in your child, They dont have to be ‘ig productions: make them expresions of lave