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Final Proposal Peer Review 2

Final Proposal Peer Review 2

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Published by Caroline Jolley

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Published by: Caroline Jolley on Apr 25, 2012
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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04/25/2012

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Flowe 1
 
Keri FloweMs. CarusoEnglish 11025 April 2012
Final
 
Proposal
Since August of 2005 we have all heard many stories of Hurricane Katrina. There are books, articles, movies, and all types of information that talk about the causes and effects of thestorm but there are very limited personal journals from those that actually experienced thedisaster.
 
There are many people that have heard the news casters tell the stories but they haven’texactly heard from a true survivor. With this book of journals about those who survivedHurricane Katrina, the audience will get a better outlook of the journey of the storm through personal and emotional experiences. True Survivors includes personal journals of manysurvivors telling their own stories of different situations like what it was like knowing the stormwas coming, what it was like during the storm, and the feelings after the disaster was
 
over.This book of journals will be told in first person many different people with some similar stories and some that are very different.
 
The information in these journals will be facts based onwhat each of the people experienced. The purpose of this book of journals is to help othersunderstand what these people really went through by hearing the story from someone thatactually experienced it and not just from what they heard on the News. People all over theUnited States heard so many different stories about what had happened but not all of them wereexactly the
 
same. Even those who had experienced the disaster did not really know what to believe.
Caroline Jolley
4/10/12 9:47 AMCaroline Jolley
4/10/12 9:50 AMCaroline Jolley
4/10/12 9:56 AMCaroline Jolley
4/10/12 9:57 AMCaroline Jolley
4/10/12 10:03 AMCaroline Jolley
4/10/12 9:59 AM
Comment:Comment:
Reviewed By Caroline JolleyKeri just wants more ideas to write about.
Comment:
Try to start this sentence off withsomething different because you use “thereare” right before this sentence in the last one.For example: You could take out the “Thereare” and just have the sentence say: Many people have heard the news casters tell thestories but they haven’t exactly heard from atrue survivor.
Comment:
You could kind of summarizeeither one or two of your journals in here to just the audience kind of what the reading will be like.
Comment:
Talk about the plot of a journal toshow how the “juicy” part of your story isgoing to be.
Comment:
Right here you could state sometragic events that people heard about on thenews. Example: the news showing roofs blownof houses, family members lost, etc.

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