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The End of the World

The End of the World

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An essay I wrote a while ago. I haven't been writing since this was written and I hadn't decided to upload it until today (12/27/08). It shows my current confused state. Is anyone else like this? Let me know.
An essay I wrote a while ago. I haven't been writing since this was written and I hadn't decided to upload it until today (12/27/08). It shows my current confused state. Is anyone else like this? Let me know.

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Published by: Bill AKA "Kenosis23" on Dec 27, 2008
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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08/01/2012

 
\a` @hl kf \a` Wk}nl
O nby oh m`l |aos dk}hohg fk} O lkh'| jhkw akw nkhg. m`fk}` l`colohg |k g`| pu. u}kdu|`lmy |a` h``l |k p}ohb|`. fohbnny nkkjohg fk} b cnkcj |k s`` wab| |od` o| os( _`s|`}lby |a`}`wbs b u}kmn`d wo|a |a` `d`}g`hcy noga|ohg bhl. m`cbps` kf |aos bnn |a` `n`c|}ocbn m}`bj`}sw`}` }`s`|: dy cnkcj os bhg}ony mnohjohg skd` wk}|an`ss |od`. sakp|ohg b| d` |k m` }`s`| o|(O| }`bnny lk`sh'| db||`}. bs O ablh'| }`s`| o| fk} s|bhlb}l |od` bhl o| abs abl b |od` bh akp} w}khg sohc`(O lkh'| jhkw way O bd sk kms`ss`l wo|a |a` |od` |aos dk}hohg: O abv` hk|aohg kf bhyckhs`rp`hc` |ab| h``ls b||`h|okh |aos dk}hohg. `b}ny k} k|a`}wos`( B f}o`hl khc` gbv` d`b wb|ca. bf|`} wb|caohg d` ckhs|bh|ny upnnohg kp| dy ULB |k g`| |a` |od`: a` gbv` o| |kd`. mp| a` bnsk bldkhosa`l d` |ab| „|aks` wak nov` my |a` wb|ca. lo` my |a` wb|ca(—O bd hk| |a` khny kh` kms`ss`l wo|a |od`: \a` Donn`hb}os|s. b m}bhl kf Ca}os|obho|y. abv`m``h wb|caohg |a` wk}nl fk} soghs |ab| wonn u}kc``l |a` „`hl |od`s(— Wb|caohg bhl wbo|ohgfk} |a` }bu|p}`. |ab| |od` wa`h Gkl }bos` |a` fbo|afpn. bs a` lol @`jo`n. f}kd |aos Wocj`lWk}nl. n`bvohg |a` }`s| kf ps fk} b kh` |akpsbhl y`b} c`n`m}b|okh kf u`bc` bhl u}ksu`}o|ym`fk}` a` phcabohs Sb|bh |k gov` ps kp} ips| l`s`}|s( O lkh'| jhkw wab| |a` fbo|afpn wonn m`lkohg b| |a` |od`: O u}kmbmny wkh'| m` bdkhg |a`d@v`}y h`w c}osos m}ohgs h`w mkkjs. |a` dkl`}h `rpovbn`h|s kf |a` dbh wak cb}}o`s |a`sbhlwoca mkb}l. pu bhl lkwh |a` s|}``|. wo|a |a` wb}hohg „]`u`h|. fk} |a` `hl os h`b}.—ukoh|ohg kp| bnn |a` soghs kf |a` „@hl \od`s(— Noj` bnn kf ps |a`y b}` nkkjohg fk} skd`d`bhohg oh |a` wk}nl. skd` ips|ofocb|okh fk} |a` oh`rpo|o`s w` lbony kms`}v` oh |a` wk}nl(O buknkgo` fk} |aos u}kmbmn` dos}`u}`s`h|b|okh kf |a` ]bu|p}`: O wbs h`v`} |bpga| bmkp||a` }bu|p}` oh dy Sphlby scakkn bhl |a` Momn` s``ds |k m` ub}|ocpnb}ny kubrp` kf d`bh$ohg kh |a` spmi`c|. bs bnn |a` }`f`}`hc`s O cbh fohl kh dy Nbu|ku( Bhymkly os w`nckd` |ks`| d` s|}boga|(Oh dy Sphlby scakkn w` su`h| kp} |od` sohgohg „I`sps. Nkv`s |a` No||n` Caonl}`h.— bhlm`ohg |knl |ab| w` w`}` gkohg |k a`bv`h wa`h w` lo`l. waon` m`ohg. fk} |a` dks| ub}|.son`h| bmkp| |aks` wak b}` a`bl`l |a` k|a`} wby. o| wbs ips| bsspd`l |ab| w` w`}`h'|bdkhg |a`d(\a` sakp|ohg kf |a` cnkcj fk}c`s d` |k f``n b}kphl oh |a` lb}j. s``johg kp| dy oUklHbhk |k fohl |a` |od`( O bd s|b}|n`l bmkp| akw dpca noga| o| up| kp|s: o|s losunby ckpnl m`ps`l bs b fnbsanoga| bhl O aku` |ab| O lkh'| wbj` Nkpos. kh` kf |a` k|a`} }`sol`h|s kf |a`Akd`n`ss Sa`n|`} wa`}` O }`sol`. fk} sp}ny a` wonn m` onn$|`du`}`l of O abv` wbj` aod |aos`b}ny(O }`bnny lkh'| ab|` bhykh`. mp| |a`}` b}` u`kun` wak O abv` fkphl. f}kd ab}l `qu`}o`hc`.o| os hk| gkkl fk} d` |k m` b}kphl( C`}|bohny. |a`}` os b g}kwohg nos| kf u`kun` wak lkh'|cb}` |k m` b}kphl d`. sk fbo} os fbo}( O fohl o| ab}l |k m`no`v` |ab| Gkl os bhy n`ss phl`}$
¯ M( W( ]``lIbhpb}y 3 & <. =551
 
\a` @hl kf \a` Wk}nl
s|bhlohg |a`h O bd( Dbym` |a` uphosad`h| fk} bh phm`no`v`} os |k bc|pbnny nov` oh b Gkl$n`ss Wk}nl: dbym` |a`}` b}` skd` u`kun` Gkl lk`sh'| cb}` |k m` b}kphl `o|a`}(Dks|ny O |}y |k m`no`v` |ab| `v`}ykh` }`bnny os lkohg |a`}` m`s|. mp| abv` m``h lbdbg`lmy Wk}nl. mp| hk| wo|akp| ukssomono|y kf }`l`du|okh( O ab|` |a` |akpga| kf skd`kh` m`ohgcp}s`l fk} bh `|`}ho|y ips| m`cbps` |a` Wk}nl abs sakwh |a`d |a` w}khg fbc`( O |aohj |ab|Gkl jhkws |aos |kk bhl dbj`s bcckddklb|okhs: a` abs bh phl`}s|bhlohg mk}h kf phckh$lo|okhbn Nkv` – phnoj` |a` }`s| kf ps(Way lk w` so| bwby f}kd |a` wk}nl. oh kp} cknn`c|ov` Cap}ca`s. skphlohg kff bgbohs| |a`sohh`}s. |aks` wak b}` b| m`s| ckhfps`l bhl dos|bj`h m`cbps` kf wab| |a` wk}nl abslkh` |k |a`d. wa`h w`. |bjohg }`sukhsomono|y fk} |a` wk}nl w` cknn`c|ov`ny mpon|. ckpnl `bcalk kp} ub}| |k }`mponl b m`||`} Wk}nl( \a` „Johglkd kf Gkl— sp}}kphls ps. of w` mponl o|(O| os 6 BD bndks| `qbc|ny bhl dbym` O sakpnl ips| n`b}h |k |}ps| dy mnbll`} bs o| abssakwh d` |k m` b fbo|afpn |od`j``u`} oh db||`}s kf wa`h O sakpnl g`| pu( Bs O }os` f}kd dym`l O kv`}mbnbhc` bhl fohl dys`nf fbnnohg oh|k so||ohg ukso|okh kh Nkpos's M`l. a`b}ohg aody`nn „Wab| |a` Fpcj.— bhl b| n`bs| dy f`b} kf wbjohg aod os kv`}: a`'s bwbj` bhl O abv` |kl`bn wo|a |a` ckhs`rp`hc`s(Uocjohg dys`nf pu. O |}y |k n`bv` |a` m`l}kkd. lk}do|k}y k} mb}}bcjs wkpnl d` dk}` bu$u}ku}ob|` – |a` hk}dbn lkpmn` m`ls abv` m``h }`unbc`l my sp}unps ibon m`ls !akd`y/ – bsrpo`|ny bs ukssomn`. bn|akpga |aos s``ds johl kf ukoh|n`ss hkw |ab| O abv` }kps`l Nkpos. |k|a` mb|a}kkd |k rpo`| dy l`dbhlohg mnbll`}(Kp| kf |a` mb|a}kkd. dy mnbll`} rpo`sc`h|. O dkv` |kwb}ls |a` novohg }kkd( @b}n absgk||`h kp| kf m`l waon` O wbs oh |a` mb|a}kkd bhl a` abs s|b}|`l |a` ckff``( O bsj aod of a`abs b cogb}`||` bhl a` kff`}s d` |wk. „kh` fk} nb|`}(— !Nb|`}. O fohl |ab| a` abs nbol |wkdk}` my Nbu|ku: a` os h`w bhl skkh`} k} nb|`} a` wonn l`col` |ab| a` cbh'| bffk}l |k j``ud` sdkjohg. mp| O bd buu}`cob|ov` fk} |a` g`s|p}` hkw(/W` mk|a gk pus|bo}s |k sdkj` son`h|ny |kg`|a`}. b son`hc` m}kj`h khny my aos }`db}jsbmkp| |a` w`b|a`} “ o| ips| s|b}|`l shkwohg “ bhl dy |`}s` }`sukhs`s( Bnn |aos dk|okhabs m``h b mbcjl}ku |k dy |akpga|s waoca abs m``h |}yohg |k l`col` of |a` d`ssbg`s Os`h| |k b „f}o`hl.— k} sk O aku` sa` ckhsol`}s a`}s`nf |k m`. y`s|`}lby w`}` onn blvos`l k}  ips|ofo`l(O abl fohbnny c}bf|`l |a` fo}s| d`ssbg` m`fk}` g`||ohg kh |a` Oh|`}h`| bhl. |akpga O jh`w|ab| o| ckpnl m` ukssomny `qunksov`. mp| O |}o`l ab}l |k j``u o| wo|aoh |a` `hv`nku` |ab| wkpnlbnnkw hk| n`bl |k b ckdun`|` m}`bjlkwh oh ckddphocb|okh( Bnn doga| abv` m``h w`nn of O abl n`f| o| b| |ab|. mp| wbo|ohg fk} d` bs O ckhh`c|`l |k |a`Oh|`}h`| wbs b d`ssbg` f}kd a`}( Dy }`bc|okh wbsh'| odd`lob|`. mp| h``l`l |od` f`}d`h|
¯ M( W( ]``lIbhpb}y 3 & <. =551
 
\a` @hl kf \a` Wk}nl
oh dy dohl m`fk}` bh onn blvos`l ckpnl mp}s| fk}|a. noj` bh kv`} u}`ssp}o`l u}`ssp}` ckkj$`} o| `qunkl`l kp|(O gk mbcj lkwh s|bo}s bhl fonn pu dy ckff`` cpu bgboh m`fk}` gkohg mbcj oh|k |a` „mb}$}bcjs— |k uocj pu dy Nbu|ku bhl dy d`locb|okh. |a` Nbu|ku |k w}o|` bhl |a` d`locb|okh |krp`nn |aos g}kwohg bhqokps f`b} |ab| abs ohvbl`l dy dohl( Nkpos bsjs d` of O'd „bnn }oga|—bhl sk o| s``ds dy fbnn kh|k aos m`l lol hk| bhg`} aod: gkkl. b| n`bs| |aos abs gkh` }oga|.a` os hk| bhg}y wo|a dy spll`h oh|`}}pu|okh kf aos sn``u(Dy „f}o`hl— bhl O abv` m``h oh skd` sk}| kf s|}bhg` lbhc` – kh` |ab| skd`|od`s }`$dohls kf b \b}bh|`nnb. bh O|bnobh lbhc` khc` mnbd`l |a` l`b|a kf |a` lbhc`}s bhl abs bukoskhkps suol`} hbd`l bf|`} o| oh ckhs`rp`hc` – fk} bmkp| |wk y`b}s hkw. waoca absm``h }`lpc`l |k „bhkhydkps— d`ssbg`s |a}kpga b w`m so|`( Bf|`} a`} fo}s| lkcpd`h|uks|. O wbs sp}` o| wbs a`}( Bf|`} a`} s`ckhl. O abl hk lkpm|s(\a` bhkhydo|y wbs a`} ol`b. waoca O rpocjny }poh`l my }`bskhohg wak |aos h`w „Oh|`}h`|f}o`hl— wbs( Kf ckp}s` O ckpnl abv` m``h w}khg. mp| sa` rpocjny }`dkv`l |a` bhkhydkpsdbsj. bldo||ohg a`} ol`h|o|y( O| os a`} skd`kh` `ns` u`}fk}dohg b sjonnfpn sodpnbc}pd kf a`}(O |aohj dy losckv`}y cbps`l a`} |k ckh|`dunb|` m}`bjohg |a` ckhh`c|okh. mp| fk} skd`}`bskh sa` u`}sos|`l fk} |a`s` |wk w``js. ph|on. O f`b}. hkw(O gk mbcj kp| |k |a` jo|ca`h. waon` @b}n l}ohjs ckff`` bhl wb|ca`s \V( O s`||n` oh|k |a`jo|ca`h |k s|b}| w}o|ohg |aos. phsp}` kf wab| O bd gkohg |k sby. khny |ab| o| wonn m` cbnn`l „\a`@hl kf |a` Wk}nl(— O bd }`bnny hk| sp}` wab| |a` `hl kf |a` wk}nl d`bhs: |a` `hl kf waks`wk}nl; O| s``ds |k d` |ab| dy wk}nl abs `hl`l b hpdm`} kf |od`s. `bca |od` o| ips| g`|s}`unbc`l my bhk|a`}(\akpga. o| ckpnl m` sbol |ab| w` Nkv` `bca k|a`}. O |aohj |ab| |aos d`bhs |wk loff`}`h||aohgs |k `bca kf ps( O bd bnwbys |aohjohg |ab| |aos d`bhs |ab| w` sakpnl b| n`bs| m`f}o`hls bhl lk |aohgs |kg`|a`} bs f}o`hls lk. waon` O |aohj o| d`bhs |ab| o| os a`} lp|y |ksbv` d` f}kd m`ohg bdkhg |a` phfbo|afpn Ca}os|obhs m`fk}` |a` rpocjny buu}kbcaohg `hl|od`s( !\aos u}kmbmny cbu|p}`s |a` so|pb|okh w}khgny. mp| O wonn n`| o| s|bhl hkw fk} m}`vo|y(/A`} d`ssbg` pus`| fk} |wk }`bskhs( Fo}s|. a`} d`ssbg` s``d`l |k bsspd` |ab| dyf``nohgs fk} abl skd`akw cabhg`l bhl |a`}`fk}` o| wbs hkw sbf` fk} a`} |k abv` skd`los|bh| ckh|bc| wo|a d` bgboh( \k d` o| s``d`l |ab| w` abl m``h b ub}|y |k |wk s`ub}b|`ckddphocb|okhs. waoca O |aohj os |a` u}kmn`ds wo|a dks| dkl`}h fk}ds kf ckddphocb|okh:of w` abl sukj`h oh u`}skh sa` wkpnl abv` jhkwh kf dy f``nohgs bhl jhkwh |ab| o| wbs„hk| sbf` |k abv` ckh|bc| y`|(—O gp`ss |aos sakpnl hk| abv` sp}u}os`l d` |aos dpca. m`cbps` O abl s`h| b d`ssbg` |ka`} }`c`h|ny sbyohg |ab| w` w`}` ohvknv`l oh b „s`}obn dkhknkgp` .— bhl |a` fbc| |ab| sa`abl hk| }`sukhl`l |k |aos. n`||ohg o| s|bhl. }`bnny ips| u}kv`l dy ukoh|(
¯ M( W( ]``lIbhpb}y 3 & <. =551

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Rose added this note
Other than a few typos and such, I don't think this needs much revising. It's a kind of "slice of life" piece that paints a clear picture of where you were at at the time -- your circumstances, surroundings, and thoughts. I think it's beautiful!
7BILLIONHUMANBEING added this note
interesting read write thoughts write gets my vote stars
Bill AKA "Kenosis23" added this note
What a mess! I have been editing and revising this all afternoon and I have begun to wonder if it worth salvaging. Someone rated it 5 stars; why?
Bill AKA "Kenosis23" added this note
This needs a severe editing job ... oh why did I upload this ball of pain?
Shaun Powell liked this

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