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Declaration of Fraydependence
(By the Fray Poster Mr Mike)
The Unanimous Declarationof the Turdwads of Ballotbox
When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one Fray people to dissolve the political bonds whichhave connected them insanely with each other, and to assume among the heated powers of the globally warmedearth, the separate and unequal station to which the laws of nature and of nature's God entitle only a few of them, adecent respect to the wacky opinions of Fraykind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them tothe separation.We Fraysters hold these half-truths to be self-evident, that all men are not created equal, that some are wellendowed by their Creator and have certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of crappiness. That to secure these rights, governments are instituted among men, deriving their lust powers from theconsent of the sheeple. That whenever any form of government becomes destructive to these ends, it is the right of the Fraypeople to whine or to take more shit, and to run away and institute a new government, laying its foundationon weak principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their safetyand happiness for government handouts. Dear Prudence, indeed, will dictate that governments long establishedshould not be changed ever and that term limits shall never be suffered; and accordingly all experience hath shownthat Fraylibs are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the formsto which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same objectevinces a design to reduce them under absolute despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to yank out their whiteflags, and to appease their masters and whimper accordingly. --Such has been the patient sufferance of those Fraylibcolons; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former systems of flatulence governance.The history of the present Frayeditor is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object theestablishment of an absolute apathy over these Frays. To prove this, let facts be submitted to a candid world.He has refused his assent to bannings and scrubbings, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good forFraylibs.He has forbidden his servers to do searches correctly, preview or retain archives of immediate and pressingimportance, unless suspended in their operation till his assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he hasutterly neglected to attend to them.
He has refused to provide preference for the accommodation of large groups of whining Fraylibs, unless those peoplewould relinquish the right of representation in the Fray due to their own hypocrisy, a right inestimable to them andformidable to Fray tyrants only.He has called together sweaty bloated bodies at places unusual like Club Fray, which is uncomfortable, and distantfrom the depository of their public records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.He has dissolved representative threads repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the Fray people.He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be ejected; whereby the editorial powers,incapable of annihilation, have returned to the fray people at large for their exercise; the state remaining in themeantime exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and weird convulsions from some Fraylibs within.He has made Fraylibs dependent on his will alone, for the tenure of their orifices, and the amount and payment of their services.He has erected a multitude of new orifices, and sent hither swarms of Fraylibs to harass Fray people, and eat outtheir substance.He has kept among us, in times of peace, stinky arms without the consent of Fraysponsor.He has affected to render the Fray servers independent of and inferior to Microsoft power.He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our morning constitutional, andunacknowledged by our laws; giving his assent to their acts of pretended acts of concern:For quartering large bodies of sweaty fat Fraylibs among us:For protecting them, then sometimes mocking them, for the wacky things which they should commit on the readersof these Frays:For cutting off Fraylibs from common-sense:For imposing Pop-ups and Drop-downs on us without our consent:For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of embedded pictures in posts:
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