Popular Science

This is the motorcycle you need to escape the apocalypse

We ride the bike designed for the end of the world.
I hope aloud that the boots I found in a dumpster are waterproof and then barge across the stream.

I hope aloud that the boots I found in a dumpster are waterproof and then barge across the stream.

Drew Ruiz

The apocalypse. End of days. All of the world’s might has mixed and tumbled in political winds to create a nuclear sharknado of destruction and a biblical, Brillo-pad cleansing.

The sky burned and the oceans turned black. Now it’s overcast almost every day. I survived, probably because I was wearing an armadillo vest that protected me from all harm. Plus, I had a mohawk on my helmet, which killed all of the brain cells that control common sense but left me with 20/15 vision.

And all I can run (just in case) and loud enough to scare away the mutant mackerel that are making their way up from the toxic beaches and into the ruins of the city. I need knobby tires for rubble, lots of fuel, and preferably no fenders in case I meet a fair maiden who has also survived—I don’t want her to think I’m a dweeb.

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