NPR

Lubrication And Lots Of Communication: Navigating A New Sexual Life After Menopause

A new book, Flash Count Diary, celebrates the emotional and creative freedom of postmenopausal intimacy.
Source: Thomas Tolstrup/Getty Images

Menopause blindsided author Darcey Steinke. The hot flashes and insomnia were uncomfortable. The depression was debilitating. And the cultural expectations — that postmenopausal women are no longer interested in sex — made her both frustrated and angry.

"I feel like in the world we live in, the patriarchal world, women are most valued for their sexuality and their motherhood," Steinke says. "Once menopause comes, there's a feeling of shame that comes for a lot of women."

So she wrote a book about it. explores Steinke's evolving identity after menopause and her new, open-minded approach to sex. If couples are willing to think beyond traditional intercourse, she argues, they'll find

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