No Worries Have A Curry

CHAPTER 1

A little girl leant on a balcony overlooking her father’s rice field, which flourished in the oldest city of Punjab, Jalandhar. She had gazed over this view many a time, but during this late afternoon, she noticed something different. She spotted a patch of dry land beneath the pinkish glow of the sky. Upon this ground, stood a lonesome building made from stone, wrapped in metal- spiked fencing. She recalled the stories told by her mother, the ones about Jalandhar Jail, the first female prison. Her mother’s voice rang through her ears, snapped her out of her daydream and forced her little feet to run back to her comfort zone.

Jalandhar jail stood far from civilisation, the nearest town was a thirty-minute drive away. The new security guard sat in the passenger’s seat of a rattling van. He felt the wind beating his skin while crossing the barren land. Manoj was thrilled to have found a job with the Indian Police force. He strutted in his Khaki uniform of a short sleeved shirt and trousers, which were far too short for a tall man. He thought keeping an eye on five female prisoners in one cell was going to be a piece of chapatti. Tiny flies greeted him as he stepped into the office, he waved them away from his face and stopped his hand from swinging across the senior guard’s head. He looked round the grey-bricked room. There was a large desk, two chairs and a couple of filing cabinets on one side. Opposite the office was the cage, numerous bars stood from floor to ceiling. Five young women in their early 20’s, resided behind bars. One stood with her back to the others, she was looking out of the tiny window. Three were sitting on thin mattresses, scattered on the floor and the other wandered aimlessly around the cell.

Neither one of prisoners thought it was necessary to acknowledge the guard's presence. Tejpal, a short, chubby officer finished his speech about the job. He paused for a moment and adjusted the needle to his wristwatch, the date was never correct. He squinted at the calendar pinned to a wall and focused on the current date- 5th Jan 1999… he muttered something while setting his watch.

Manoj stared into the cell like a spectator in a zoo. These are the criminals? They don’t look the type, the chair creaked as Manoj sat down.

Tejpal sat down and pulled out a bottle from under the desk, Hard to believe na, behind that beauty, is pure evil!

Tejpal unscrewed the bottle of Indian liquor and poured into two steel cups. He placed a cup before Manoj and referred to it as the perks of the job. Manoj was curious to find out what the girls had done. Tejpal settled his curiosity by pulling out five tatty files from one of the cabinets.

He pointed at the cell and murmured, That one sitting cross legged on the floor... holding the bars, Gulab Kaur Gurwala… He realised that the prisoner was giving him a dirty look, Oh teri! Who do you think you are staring at?! He struck his cane on the desk.

Manoj flinched, but the prisoner didn’t seem effected, the sound was so frequent that the element of surprise had long gone.

Watch this one, she shoots venom from her eyes, Tejpal sat back and picked out her file.

Gulab shifted her hazel eyes from the guard and cursed under her breath. She resented this entrapment; she hated being watched by perverse guards, she was sick of hearing the verbal abuse targeted at her and her fellow prisoners.

Tejpal opened her file, Gulab ran away from her family home to pursue her disgraceful lifestyle, which involved alcohol, drugs and affairs with various men. She worked as a barmaid at the ‘Shanti Bar’ near Chandigarh rail station. She lived in the flat above the bar where she freely carried out days and nights of sin. Gulab refused to pay her rent for 12 months and avoided paying her medical bill of 3000 rupees. She placed great, financial strain on the landlord, Mr Pingal who had to seek police assistance. Gulab was arrested on May 10th 1998. Her lack of remorse and respect in court resulted in a 12-month prison sentence. Tejpal moved on to the next file. Preeti Kaur Phull, she’s sitting in the far corner, writing.

Preeti sat cross-legged in the corner of the cell, jotting notes in her blue notebook. Her dark skin glowed when she thought of a useful idea to record. Her big chocolate eyes twinkled as they scanned the mouldy ceiling. She mumbled something to herself, nodded and continued to write.

Preeti wanted to move away from her family home without getting married. Her argumentative nature encouraged her to humiliate her guardians on several occasions, but on the night of May 6th, 1998 she ran away from home and stole a motorbike belonging to a policeman (witness statements enclosed). Preeti admits to stealing a police vehicle for menacing purposes, he took a gulp of his drink and opened file 3.

He pointed out the prisoner who stood out from the others, simply because she had more movement going on than the others, she was twirling in the middle of the cell.

Bilo Kaur Bhamra, Tejpal shook his head in disappointment and huffed. Always bloody dancing around, not right in the head… Tejpal noticed Manoj drooling over the prisoner who was oblivious to what was going on the other side of the cage.

Bilo tied her chunni around her waist and tied up her long dark brown hair, which was naturally glossy. She danced to the music in her head and could not resist humming out loud. Her ocean blue eyes saw a world of her own. Her imagination was the one place where she was free.

Bilo accepted the marriage proposal from Timmy Bhogal, a wealthy young businessman from Englaaand. On the day of the wedding, she saw Timmy Bhogal in person and refused to proceed with the ceremony. She ran to the 24 hours Singhsbury’s Superstore car park. Here, she broke into a Maruti 2000 and vandalised four other vehicles. When the police arrived, Bilo was in a hysterical state, she attacked a fellow officer who tried to calm her down. The incident took place on May 7th, 1998. Bilo pleaded guilty to vandalism of five vehicles, attempted theft and assault on a police officer. Tejpal looked at the cell and pointed out another prisoner. See the one lying on her back, Jagero Kaur Thind. I've heard the others call her Jags.

Jags rested on her 2-inch thick mattress, she tried to sleep while Bilo hovered around like an irritating fly. She tossed over on her side and buried her head under her pillow in an attempt to control her temper, she closed her eyes and tried to focus on calming thoughts.

Jagero accused her husband, Sandip Singh Thind of having an affair, this was her excuse to abuse him verbally and physically. Sandip was an honourable gentleman who had hoped that his love for his wife would change her violent behaviour, but all his efforts failed when Jagero imagined that he was having an affair with another woman. She brutally attacked Sandip and did not stop beating him till the police arrived at the scene. Jagero pleaded guilty to actual bodily harm with intentions to kill on May 8th, 1998. Tejpal closed her file.

My God! Manoj was stunned.

Do not be deceived by beauty, all beauty has a beast hidden within. You think that was bad, listen to this one. Tejpal opened the last file labelled, RANI KAUR BANSAL printed in bold, he pointed out the prisoner that was leaning against the wall by the window.

Rani spent most of her time, looking out of the small window, the view was far better than the one inside. She would stare at the dull land and watch the day disappear, just like the life she once had. A dusty breeze brushed against her high cheekbones, she blinked then continued to stare into the barren land. Flashes of her past would often be the reason behind the swelling of her dark brown eyes.

Rani Kaur Bansal willingly accepted the marriage proposal from Gurpal Singh Chana, all to fulfil her father’s wish of being the wife of a successful businessman. The Chana family treated Rani with respect and love. Rani was jealous of the close relationship her husband had with his parents and siblings. Despite the Chana’s efforts to make Rani a part of the family, she made many attempts to cause feuds among family members (please see witness statements attached). Rani’s malicious behaviour forced Gurpal to turn to alcohol. When her mother-in-law tried to talk about their domestic problems, Rani got angry and brutally attacked her. Rani was in a sound state of mind when she confessed to murdering her mother-in-law by setting her on fire on the evening of May 5th, 1998.

Manoj was horrified, he took a look at the cage, Rani had not moved from the window, he wasn’t sure what to say after absorbing these stories.

Any daughters Manoj? Tejpal poured another shot.

Oh no, I’ve been blessed with two sons.

Very lucky! Let’s drink to that! He raised his glass and did just that.

Gulab was in the midst of an intense daydream, she imagined breaking out of the cage, hyped with rage, leaping over the desks, smashing the bottle of liquor across one officers’ head and giving the other a backhanded slap. The dream switched to one not so violent. She pictured herself sitting in her favourite restaurant- Curry Hut, munching as many spicy dishes as possible, meat and non-veg. Her favourite dish was Saag Paneer with tandoori roti. Such a beautiful vision had the right background music, a soft melody. The record scratched when Bilo tripped over and fell on top of Gulab, pressing her face against the bars. Gulab had two vertical black marks on her forehead. Jags watched the amusement and burst out laughing when she saw Gulab’s face.

Out of all the things to fall on, you choose me! Thanks, Bilo!

I’m sorry it was an accident, Bilo tried to help rub out the bar marks.

And that’s the story of your life Luv, said Jags while calming down from her fit of laughter.

Gulab slapped her hands away, not accepting her apology, which was constant whining of I’m sorry! Bilo gave up grovelling and stomped over to Preeti’s intelligence corner to find a little sympathy, which Preeti usually offered, but not on this occasion, she was busy working on a plan. Rani finished contemplating for the evening; her desire for change was growing by the day.

This is getting stupid now, Rani crossed her arms.

Do you think I wear bar marks for fashion? Ueerr NO! Gulab rubbed her forehead vigorously then asked, Have they gone yet?

I was talking about being in this damn cell! I’m not spending the rest of my life in this shit hole watching… Rani looked ahead at the officers knocking back drinks, That every night.

You should have thought of that before you fried your mother-in-law, Jags sat upright.

Rani ignored the remark and began to pace the cell. Jags looked up at the ceiling and noticed a leak in the corner of the cell, she focused in on it for a couple of seconds. Rani’s footsteps soon reached her ears and travelled along her last nerve.

If it’s not Bilo hover crafting above my head at 100 miles per hour, there’s always a crazy Rani walking, just give it a rest already! She stressed.

Pacing is the only thing that is keeping me sane. I need to get out of here!

Where there’s a will there is a way, Preeti gave her a hopeful look.

Why don’t you tell us what you have to say? Bilo thought they were playing her favourite rhyming game.

According to my plan, we won’t have to stay here another day, Preeti tapped her pencil on the page.

Hurray! Gulab cheered, a moment later, Sorry couldn’t think of another rhyme.

You have problems with that most of the time, Jags stood up and stretched her arms.

They huddled round Preeti to see what she had planned.

What have you got? Asked Rani in a quiet tone, she caught a glimpse of a pair of blue eyes looking very confused.

That didn’t rhyme, Bilo stared at Rani intently.

Rani returned a perplexed stare and wondered how on earth she had put up with this stupid rhyming game, for 9 months! She huffed, And it was I who committed the greatest crime.

Bilo clapped her hands, the others got ready to hear this groundbreaking plan, Preeti whispered the idea. She paused when she heard footsteps, actually more of a stumble followed by a thump against the cell door. She quickly slid the book under her mattress. Tejpal tapped his cane on the bars and tried to stand straight, the last of the seven drinks had shot straight to his head.

What-ya- doing- you stupid tarts! His bad breath reeked from a meter away.

He continued to insult them for a few minutes, which Jags found it difficult to ignore, she walked up to the cell door. He stopped swearing when she came into full view, he took a step back.

We were plotting to kill your mother for giving birth to an overweight useless lump of humanity!

Shut your mouth before I come in there and... His nostrils flared.

Jags moved closer to the bars, And what! She held the bars. What are you going to do!

It was a matter of seconds before she erupted, Tejpal felt insulted, he debated entering the cage, Jags had an intimidating streak to her. She was tall, attractive, athletic and 90% of the time was ready to fight. Her stunning chocolate eyes would give the most deadly of stares. His reputation was on the line, this would not look right before the new recruit, who at that point, was so drunk that he had zonked out in his chair, head back, mouth wide open. The light bulb flickered just above Rani’s face; she pulled Jags away from the barred door and faced Tejpal.

She didn’t mean to offend you, we know what you are capable of, I apologise on her behalf, Rani tried to sound sincere.

Gulab ran over, got her knees and turned on the crocodile tears. We all apologise for her, please don’t harm my friend, she’s promised to take me to curry hut when we get out of here.

Do you think that I! Officer… Tejpal was so furious that he was having problems in finding the words to finish his sentence.

Tejpal! Bilo yelled out.

He took a glance at Bilo, as to say ‘thanks’. He looked at Rani and continued. That I… Officer Tejpal will let her get away with insulting my Mata Ji! He shouted while striking his cane.

I’m not sure, are you? Gulab raised a brow and crossed her arms.

Bilo was confused before she could question what was going on, Preeti whispered in her ear. They are just pretending, don’t say anything.

Bilo nodded. So I can say anything other than the word anything? She looked dead serious.

Preeti was about to nod but stopped when she realised that Bilo had completely misunderstood, No! We’re not playing that game!

What game are we playing?

Bilo, just Shhh hoja, Preeti replied patiently.

That’s new, I can do that- what do I get if I win?

A get out of jail free card, Preeti watched the guard reaching for the keys hanging from his belt.

He managed to grab hold of the bunch of 15 keys, it took a good 5 minutes to find the key to the cell. Finally, he managed to unlock the door.

Watch now, I will show all... Seven of you a lesson! He stumbled into the cell and slammed the door shut.

Bilo looked around in search of the mysterious other two people he had counted. Rani, Gulab and Jags formed a circle around him. Tejpal’s buzz was wearing off, he realised that maybe walking into this cell was not a bright idea. Jags stood before him, clenching her fists, she glared into his eyes. If only looks could kill, we would be falsifying our tears at Tejpal’s funeral. It took one look from Rani for Preeti to grab Bilo’s arm and shoot out the cell.

Stop! Get back here! Tejpal turned to stop them, Gulab stuck her foot out and tripped him up and watched him hit the floor like a sack of potatoes.

He grabbed his cane and jumped back to his feet, telling Gulab that she would be the first to get the beats. As he swung back his cane to strike, Jags caught hold of it. She spun him around and pushed him up against the cold crumbling wall. Tejpal felt her nails digging into his neck.

You are making a terrible mistake! He struggled.

Jags had crossed the lines of rational thought, she released her anger that had built up over the last nine months. The cage echoed with the sound of cracking bones followed by his screams. Meanwhile, Preeti and Bilo raided the police station to find anything of use. Amongst the rushing around, Bilo noticed that Manoj looked as if he was about to wake up. Bilo had tied him to the chair with rope, handcuffs and telephone cables; there was no chance of the phones ringing now. Preeti stopped running around aimlessly when she saw a mummified Manoj. She paused for a moment, maybe it was best not to question Bilo’s methods, time was ticking.

Manoj was woken up by a loud CLANG, he saw his colleague splattered across the bars of the cell door. Holy cow! his eyes widened.

Where? Bilo looked around like a mad woman.

He wriggled like a worm, OH! He strained to break free but failed, I can’t move, help… BACHAO! He jigged up and down, still unable to break the ties and knots.

Preeti built the courage to pick up the empty bottle, in a quick move, she swung it across his head, he stopped moving. Oh no- no-no, please don’t die... She checked if he was breathing, thankfully he was alive. She threw the bottle to one side and took a few deep breaths.

Gulab and Rani were worried as well as shocked when Jags insisted on battering Tejpal like dirty washing, Gulab tried to pull her back. Enough Jags he’s as good as dead!

Ok! Alright, Jags caught a breath and put her hands up to show that she was calming down.

Gulab edged away thinking that it was safe to do so. Jags thought of the times he had taunted them, the degrading and perverse comments rushed through her head. A few seconds later, she dived back in to batter the limp, unconscious body on the floor. Rani managed to drag Jags away from Tejpal and pinned her to the wall.

Jags! What does it matter we’re free!

Jags eased off the struggle and almost froze, she thought about the word ‘free’, were they really? Ever going to be free? Was this going to be the starting point of a race that had no finishing line?

Gulab picked up the bunch of keys by the knocked out guard. She couldn’t understand the purpose of 15 keys, there were only three doors with locks, in the whole building. She flung the keys over to Preeti, the large bunch landed in her hands. Preeti spent a few minutes working out, which key could unlock the door that led to freedom. Her hands began to tremble as she inserted a key into the lock. For the first time in nine months, a full moon shone upon the dull land outside the Jail. Preeti and Bilo found a police van parked outside. Bilo could not believe that they were breathing in the open air. She squeezed Preeti’s arm with excitement and shrieked.

Is this really happening or am I dreaming? Oh God! Pinch me, actually no! I bruise like a tomato.

Preeti huffed a little laughter, What? No, you’re not dreaming, let’s get the others! She rushed back into the building.

The others had discovered a box of handguns while raiding the office. Rani took a gun and a fist full of bullets and wrapped them in her chunni. Jags got hold of a gun and aimed at Tejpal who was flat on the floor like a helpless insect. Her hand began to shake, she had no idea of what she was doing. Gulab caught sight of her, she zoomed over and forcefully lowered the gun.

Did you want to be in for life?! she stressed, waving her hands frantically in the air.

Rani ran into the cell, pulled off Tejpal’s belt, rushed over to Manoj and tied it round his mouth, it wouldn’t be long before he returned to his senses. They all helped to drag Manoj with chair into the cell and locked it. There was slight relief in knowing that the guards could not stop them. Rani’s heart was pounding when she spotted the Police radio system behind the desk. Preeti dived over and disconnected any cable she could find. Rani was little surprised at how their chain of thoughts had synchronised beyond words.

They dashed into the van one by one leaving the driver’s seat was empty, there was an awkward pause, they clearly hadn’t thought this far ahead. Bilo held out the bunch keys and gave them a little shake.

Ok, that’s all of us in the van… so! Who’s driving?

Rani huffed, snatched the keys from her hands and jumped into the drivers’ seat. She managed to pick out the correct key in a couple of seconds. The engine rumbled as she took a quick look around, her hands gripped the steering wheel, it had been a while since she had done this. Preeti informed that the guards would have entered and left through the main gates at the front of the building, it was the only way to the City. Rani thought the best way to hide their tracks was to go in the opposite direction, around the back of the building. The only problem was that they had no idea of what was beyond those back gates, there was only one way to find out.

You sure about this? Asked Preeti.

What do you mean- sure about this? We can’t go back now! Shouted Jags.

No, no, I’m not going back! Bilo cried. Please just drive!

It’s ok, Rani you’re right- let’s just get out of here, Gulab said nervously.

How are we going to pass that? Preeti pointed out the wooden barricade ahead.

We’re not going to pass it, Rani focused on the gates, We’re going to smash through it, hold on tight!

She stamped her foot on the accelerator, the engine roared as the tires screeched. Heads jerked back as the van smashed through the wooden exterior gates, leaving the prison behind in a thick cloud of dust and smoke. Rani had no idea of where she was going or where they were going to end up, during the manic drive all she thought of was how she landed in this mess.

CHAPTER 2

Rani

I was an excellent student in housework, my knowledge was a gift from the mature women of the village. Their skills and wisdom stemmed from the grounds of Ajnala, a small village on the outskirts of the holy city, Amritsar. The area was home to carpenters and farmers.

I enjoyed school, I had my heart set on going to University to study Law and English, but my dream was far too ambitious for a village girl. My schooling stopped when I was 15 years old. Baba Ji, my father could no longer afford my fees. I had a small family, Baba Ji, my sister Bindi and the only man I ever gave my heart to... Arjun. I often think of those sunny, colourful days, running through the rice fields with Arjun chasing me, I was too quick for him.

Rani! You run like you’re fleeing from the police… He would say while chasing me. Funny how it all turns out.

We would sit under the mango tree outside our house and dream about our wedding, how we would make our home, names for our unborn children. There is nothing I want more than to go back in time and spend only a few moments in his arms, to feel his gentle touch, to see him smile, hear his voice. Arjun was my childhood sweetheart, the village hunk, he was my first and last love. He was everything I wanted and was all that I needed, to feel complete.

Rani, I don’t need much, the sky is my shelter, your heart is my home, and your love is what keeps me going! He never got tired of saying this.

Arjun was an orphan who grew up on others hand downs and leftovers. That is was partly the reason he had his heart set on building a huge house and having a dozen children to spoil rotten. He was an excellent carpenter, he picked up the trade from Baba Ji. Bindi adored him, he was superb with her, never treated her differently or patronised her for having the mentality of a twelve-year-old at the age of twenty-seven.

There was a mad man in the village called Murli, he was the local tramp that most of the villagers chose to avoid. He claimed that Bindi was his lover in a previous life. She was the cutest and sweetest little girl in the village; she befriended everyone, even Murli. Baba Ji never spoke about it, he stopped talking from that day onwards. It happened during the summer, two days before her twelfth birthday. Bindi had gone missing, the villagers found her in a barn, unconscious, wearing nothing but a blanket. Her body covered in bruises and blood, she had a wound to the back of her head- it seemed that she did put up a fight. Murli was dangling from the ceiling, he probably knew that the villagers would have killed him.

The pain and guilt drove Mother to finish off a bottle of poison. Baba Ji felt that he had failed on every account, he sunk into a deep state of shock. He blamed himself for the tragedy that was to haunt Bindi for the rest of her life. I had to fill the shoes of an elder sister without much choice. Baba Ji did his bit by putting food on the table, he spent most of his days and nights working in a paper mill factory in Amritsar.

After leaving school, I began making clothes for Bindi and myself. Arjun bought me a reliable sewing machine, which I used to make clothes for him too. Whenever he took me to the pictures, usually once a fortnight, I would memorise the latest designs the actresses were wearing and sketch them down in the theatre. I would use the designs to make the same outfits when I got home. I developed an art for tailoring, I earned good money by making Punjabi outfits for the local women. We could afford little treats, like eating out, fancy toiletries, new chappals, etc. The dark clouds were fading away, allowing a ray of hope to shine upon our small world.

During a summer’s day, just a couple of days before Bindi’s twenty-eighth birthday, Arjun took me out on a shopping trip to Amritsar. I needed some fabrics and a present for Bindi, there was a dollhouse she had her heart set on. Though it took me a year to save up, I found that I was still short, so Arjun put some money in for the present. He was doing well with selling his handmade furniture. He brought a motorbike that he needed to show off that day. We visited the most sacred place of worship, the Golden Temple, which is a historical landmark for Sikhism, it is like the Mecca for Sikhs. We spent all morning wandering around, joking, laughing and haggling with shopkeepers. On our way to a funfair nearby, I had a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach, I squeezed his arm as my heart began to race.

We have to go Arjun, my feet would not go further.

No we don’t, it is early, and I’m really in the mood for a Kulfi and a-

Arjun, please, I want to go home now, I don’t feel too good- we’ll come back tomorrow!

I want that in writing, he joked.

Arjun!

Ok, we’ll go home, he realised that I was serious.

The journey back was awful, it poured down with rain and winds so strong that we nearly had an accident. We reached home to see no sign of Bindi, she was not waiting by the door as expected. I called out for her a few times but wasn’t getting a reply, I ran out to the back of the house. Arjun checked the kitchen and the rooftop, I ran behind him into the room I shared with Bindi. Arjun found her in bed, she wasn’t breathing so he went to get the local doctor. I tried to wake her up, I thought she was playing one of her pranks.

Bindi, this isn’t funny! I touched her face she was stone cold. I tried to hold my tears back. I’ve got a surprise for you… if you don’t wake up, you’re not going to get your present!

The doll house on the back of the motorbike had fallen and shattered into pieces, just like me. I held her close and rocked back and forth, crying and begging her to wake up.

The next day, the villagers gathered outside the house with tears streaming from their eyes. They took Bindi away to the empty field by the river, to say goodbye. She looked so beautiful in the traditional Punjabi red bridal dress. I had to ask her to wake up just one more time. Baba Ji carried out the cremation ritual as the priest recited a prayer for the passing of her soul to a place where she could rest in peace. I stood by Baba Ji’s side and watched the flames take our Bindi, turning her to ashes. Time had come to a standstill as we stared at the continuous smoke. Baba Ji told me about an argument he had a few hours before she died.

I was speaking with your uncle, about arranging your marriage. I didn’t know that Bindi was listening. She screamed, shouted… She thought I was getting you married to punish her. She thought I wanted to separate the two of you.

After Bindi’s funeral, Baba Ji and I spent more time together, he would take time off work to go out on family trips around the city. Arjun found it difficult, he knew that Baba Ji wasn’t too happy with him hanging around me all the time. Arjun didn’t own land or property, he lived in his workshop on rent. At times, he seemed too carefree, this was a trait that Baba Ji didn’t like.

The memory I look back in fondness is a wedding celebration in the village, it was Arjun's best friend’s wedding. The entire community was invited. The ceremony took place at the Golden Temple. We sat cross-legged with heads covered and listened to the priest reciting passages from the Guru Granth Sahib. He spoke of the meaning of marriage, commitment, loyalty and love. Arjun and I were in perfect view of each other. Though we were sitting apart, we couldn’t keep our eyes off each other, for a moment it felt like we were getting married. When the bride and groom were asked to stand up, Arjun and I were about to get up, we stopped midway, realising that we were getting shameful looks.

The after party was back at the village where a live Punjabi orchestra played classical Punjabi and Hindi songs. The guests arrived at an enormous 10ft high crème marquee. Clay lamps light up the inside of the marquee with silk red, yellow and mauve fabrics draped over the hand carved pillars that supported the marquee. The bride and groom sat at a backlit area, looking like Royalty. They were so thrilled, you could tell by the way the groom looked at his wife, he could not wait for this party to come to an end. Arjun and I stood from a distance watching the newlyweds and guessing what they were saying to one another. We made up our own comical version of the conversation taking place, we thought we were so funny.

Arjun wore traditionally but upmarket male attire, he looked more handsome than usual that night. He had perfect skin, the only man in the village with a six pack. His beard was neatly trimmed and had a tint of brown, as did his glossy hair, which he kept under his turban. I wore a fitted turquoise, elegant gold patterned Kameez with a lungi (long skirt). He was glued to my side, making sure that I didn’t get any male attention, I was happy being by his side, and felt free whenever I was with him. We performed a dance that impressed the other guests. Luckily, Baba Ji was having drinks with the elder men at, the quieter end of the venue.

We returned home just before midnight, Baba Ji went to bed as soon as we got in. I was in the midst of undressing when the clock struck 12, there was a tap on my window.

Rani let me in, he whispered.

Arjun? I opened the window.

He crawled through and landed on the floor with a loud thump. We heard Baba Ji’s footsteps, Arjun panicked and hid in the wardrobe, it was a tight squeeze. I had to control my laughter at the sight of him climbing back out.

That was close, I’m telling you if he returns- I’m not hiding. Remind me to make you a bigger wardrobe, He closed the closet.

What would you have done if Baba Ji caught you?

I’d look him straight in the eye and say that he won’t find a better son-in-law than me, so be a good father and give us your blessing, he wrapped his arms around me.

Really? I placed my hands on his chest. And what if he said no?

I’d pick you up and take you away, he threw me over his shoulder. Do you want to go via the door or the window?

Arjun put me down!

Where? Here or there? After swinging me round, he gently placed me on the bed.

You don’t have the guts to ask Baba Ji for my hand.

He laughed. Why do I need ask for something that belongs to me?

Arjun I’m serious! I looked into his eyes.

My love, I want to get stable first, I’m working on getting a house, there’s a piece of land out-

By the time you get yourself stable someone else would have taken my doll.

Aye! Over my dead body! He gave me my birthday kiss.

He was always the first to greet me on my birthday. Every year, he would creep into my room just gone midnight to wish me a happy birthday. That evening I had turned eighteen, and that was the first time we made love, it was the most beautiful night of my life, I wish that night had never come to an end.

Baba Ji was so thrilled when a prestigious family from the city, made a request for my hand in marriage. The suitor was Gurpal, he was Arjun’s business associate, I met him a couple of times at the workshop. I thought he was creepy, but Arjun was convinced that he was a decent guy. Baba Ji thought that Gurpal was the right husband for me. When they came to our house on my birthday, they allowed us to talk alone.

He told me how happy he was with this proposal, he stared at me as if I was a piece of meat. I said that I was in love with Arjun and I couldn’t go ahead with this marriage. The elders had already arranged our engagement and coming from a poor family I could not turn Gurpal down, only he could break off the engagement. He promised that he would, but he never did and to make matters worse, Arjun had disappeared. People thought he was doing business in Amritsar, it was unlike him to go off without letting me know where he was going.

The night before the wedding, Gurpal told me that he had spoken Arjun and he’d said that he wanted me to marry Gurpal because he couldn’t offer the life I deserved. He handed me a letter from Arjun, I read through it and understood that something was seriously wrong. I begged Baba Ji not to destroy my life, I told him about my relationship with Arjun to which he responded by slapping me across the face. He soon broke down in tears.

Get out of this poverty, I’ve given my word, please fulfil my one wish beti and free me from this burden! He sobbed.

I’d never seen him cry, never seen him beg, his tears tortured me. To keep my father’s dignity, I closed my eyes and walked through fire. That was the day I stopped smiling.

The grass isn’t always greener on the other side. The Chana family appeared wealthy and respectable, but behind closed doors, it was a different story. It was behind these doors I suffered in silence. Gurpal was an alcoholic, the only time he was sober was when he slept. His father was consumed by his illegal dealings and wasn't concerned about anyone else other than himself. The other family members were not to question him or look him in the eye. My mother-in-law reviled me because I wasn’t from a wealthy family and arrived at their home without a dowry, I was the toy her son kicked and screamed for. She would find any excuse to taunt and hit me, I kept on thinking that if I followed her orders, maybe she would have a change of heart and start treating me like a daughter. Gurpal’s brothers and friends thought I was their property, they’d touch and grope me when Gurpal had his back turned or when he was too drunk to notice what was happening. When I defended my honour, his brother labelled me ‘the whore’.

I spent six years in that hell hole, I think the numerous physical and mental torture made me stronger. During the sixth year, I was immune to any pain. I was lifeless, drained and possibly in a state of shock over what was being done to me. An indescribable force pushed me from day to day. There was a point where I tried to end it all by swallowing a bottle of bleach, I guzzled it down like water, and it didn’t work.

Then came the moment I cracked, it happened during one evening when Gurpal returned home drunk. The family had gone to a wedding in another village, this was the first time in six years that Gurpal and I were alone in the house. I’d finished cleaning and could tell that he was itching for an argument, like most nights, I never argued back, I’d sit there in silence and listen to the shouting and slurring. He forced