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Complete Lectures of the Pathwork 1996 Edition Vol. 5

Complete Lectures of the Pathwork 1996 Edition Vol. 5

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Complete Lectures of the Pathwork 1996 Edition Vol. 5

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946 pages
22 hours
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Sep 26, 2013
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9781931589451
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This volume contains lectures 201-258 of the 1996 edition of the Pathwork Lectures given by Eva Pierrakos between 1957 and 1979 to Pathwork Communities worldwide. The teachings, profoundly concerned with self-knowledge, self-acceptance, and self-responsibility, are full of wisdom and love.

Publisher:
Released:
Sep 26, 2013
ISBN:
9781931589451
Format:
Book

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Complete Lectures of the Pathwork 1996 Edition Vol. 5 - Eva Pierrakos

Salvation

Pathwork Guide Lecture No. 201

1996 Edition

May 19, 1972

DEMAGNETIZING NEGATIVE FORCE FIELDS — PAIN OF GUILT

My dearest friends, greetings and blessings for everyone of you here. The beginning of tonight's lecture will be a brief recapitulation of certain facets of spiritual laws which I have discussed in the past, particularly in the lectures on images. We shall now explore the material more deeply and let it expand further.

The fusion of consciousness and energy is of such a tremendous power that this fusion creates an electromagnetic energy field. This force field contains every conceivable seed or possibility of creation: every conceivable attitude or concept about life creates such a field. Once a force field is activated, it sets events, patterns, behaviors, reactions, and states of body and soul into its specific mold. The magnetism of this field is so strong that ensuing actions and events are inexorably set in motion, and these actions and events continue to perpetuate the power of this specific force field.

The force field of a specific attitude to life is also ruled by laws of attraction — like attracting like. Thus you who have created various force fields as a result of your attitudes, ideas, concepts, and approaches to life, attract or repulse events, people, happenings, and actions of others and also of yourself. You set up continuous chains of action and reaction of which you often lose track: when an event occurs in your life, you no longer know by what specific belief and consequent action you have created it.

This applies, of course, to both real and false ideas and to consequent experience which is either productive and blissful or destructive and painful. It is an important aspect of this pathwork to first understand this principle, and then to see where and how this applies to your personal life.

My friends on the path have discovered various force fields of distorted ideas which we call images. You have experienced within you how what you now know to be a misconception about life has governed your actions and reactions and has consequently brought corresponding events to pass. You now see quite clearly that these events are hardly what they at first seemed to be, mere coincidence. They occur by immutable law: the law of self-creation.

You have experienced in the further course of this path the depths of the negative emotions connected with these false ideas. You have also uncovered the negative intentionality that you had instituted as a result. Yet you find yourself stymied in giving up the whole nucleus of the image, or force field. Although you know the ideas are false, you cannot help reacting as if they were true. For example, you believe no woman is trustworthy because you felt your mother rejected you. You now know that this equation is grossly false, yet you are compelled to react to all women as if they were your unloving mother. You do not want to give up your negative intentionality regarding her, and your feelings of hate, blame, and resentment. You do not wish to open your heart to love any woman. Regardless of your outer, conscious belief, inwardly you now discover that this is how you react. You seem caught or trapped in this image, although you know that it is unfair, unreasonable, unintelligent, and that it causes you and others pain and frustration, unfulfillment, and perpetual guilt and longing.

It is extremely difficult to change these force fields, but it is certainly possible. No one who is not deeply involved in and committed to a path such as this, in which deepest self-confrontation on all levels takes place, can possibly do this. To begin with, one is not even aware of the beliefs one holds, which then create force fields with all their ensuing chain reactions. To discover particular images, to experience fully and without defense all the feelings involved in them, to take responsibility for the negative intentionality, are all actions that indicate significant progress and deeply meaningful work on the path of purification. These steps are necessary pre-requisites but do not by themselves change the creative power of the force fields: something more is needed, as many of you are discovering. I would say that many of you on the path have now arrived at such a juncture, at least in a part of your personality: you see, know, understand, and fully experience pain, fear and anger; you assume responsibility for your intentions and negative will. Yet something in you holds you where you are, although you know quite well at what price. This lecture is supposed to help you move ahead from here.

For those who are at the beginning of the path, or for those who still defend against fully assuming responsibility for their lives and are therefore blocked, the existing image can be deduced infallibly by looking at the life manifestation. Life reveals what one's underlying beliefs and attitudes must be. It cannot be otherwise.

The magnetic power of the force field is self-indoctrinating and self-perpetuating; it is like a deeply imprinted motor mechanism, set in motion with great energy. Thus a stronger energy is required to deactivate this motor force and to change a negative force field into a positive one. To put it differently, the image has to be dissolved and the creative energy that was locked up in this image is to be utilized from now on in ways that are compatible with divine law.

Now let us directly go into the main topic of this lecture. How do you change a negative force field into a positive one? How do you dissolve an image? How do you recreate realistic concepts and imprint them so deeply into your soul system that positive will, feeling, and action ensue? In other words, how do you demagnetize a negative force field?

Different approaches are necessary for voluntary and involuntary intentionality. Of course, as you proceed with your purification, all involuntary attitudes eventually become voluntary, but at certain stages, and in certain areas this is not yet so. For instance, you may be perfectly aware of having a strong defense against feeling a specific pain; you know by many proofs that this pain must be in you, but you cannot feel it, although you want to. By the same token, a negative intentionality may be quite conscious, or it may manifest indirectly and you are not yet conscious of it as such. Needless to say that in the latter case the approach must be different.

In instances of both voluntary and involuntary intentionality it is essential for the conscious mind to express its positive intent and formulate it concisely. But this must not be done in self-delusion and by superimposing positive intent over unconscious irrational resistance and defiance. The two voices must be brought face to face, and the conscious personality shall make the final decision.

We have discussed various false reasons for one's insistence on remaining in a state of falsehood and pain. Primarily it is a question of identification. As long as you identify only with the negative aspect of your ego self, giving up something that is the primary motivating force of this ego seems like self-annihilation, and you cannot give up what seems to be intrinsically you. You therefore need to systematically establish identification with your real self. Unless you do this, you will lack the volition to give up what destroys happiness and joy.

The first steps toward this new identification with your real self, apart from simple prayer and meditation, are to reach into new modalities with your mind. If you now hate, say with your conscious mind, I also have in me the possibility to love. I want this new state and wish to utilize all my hidden energies and creative forces. Or, if you believe you can function only in a non-feeling, isolated, spiteful state, although you would want your state to be different, declare the inherent possibilities within you and say, There are inner powers and energies I wish to mobilize. The same me that is now locked into spite and withholding contains other, more natural and beautiful ways of being. I want to manifest this new state as my own inherent state.

At the same time, alternately or simultaneously, the demagnetization process takes place by going deeply into your innermost stillness. I have talked about this at intervals since the very beginning when this channel was established. I have given exercises for learning concentration and ways to still the mind. Yet many of my friends find themselves apparently incapable of even attempting to do this. I might say that with increasing progress you will develop the self-discipline to give yourself time for these practices every day. Even only a few minutes pursued regularly will pay tremendous dividends, my friends. If you do this seriously, just becoming still and expressing your intent to hear the will of God, to feel the presence of God within you, it will happen. You can also go back to the various lectures I have given about these specific exercises and use them for a few minutes each day. Whether you do these specific exercises or use others perhaps more to your liking, the only way to demagnetize a negative force field is to establish contact with your divine reality, your cosmic eternal self. You must become very still and turn into your inner stillness and wait for its manifestations.

Here you have right away a contradiction that seems apparently insurmountable. As long as a deliberate negativity or negative intentionality exists in you, your resistance to commune with your eternal, spiritual self will be too great. And yet, as long as you do not call on the help of your spiritual reality, you must find yourself incapable of giving up your negative intentionality.

Let us take for example the common and pervasive attitude of wishing to punish your parents. You do realize that this spiteful self-destructiveness has absolutely no benefit for you, yet you feel you cannot even want to give it up. Since you cannot want to give it up, you do not feel clean enough to let God manifest in you. Neither can you listen to the creative spirit and attune yourself to its presence. Then you cannot know the eternal being you really are.

The only way to come out of this self-contradiction that holds you immobilized with magnetic force, in spite of your knowing what you are doing with your life, is to begin to use thought processes in a new way. Let us take the same example: I want to punish my parents by my own misery and spite and non-giving, or, I do not want to love my parents, so I cannot love anybody else because I want everyone to become better parents for me than those I really had. Once you are aware of this attitude — and a good part of the pathwork consists of becoming aware of such things — then you can see yourself hooked and trapped there.

The freeing new thought process might be to begin with, I do not want to stay in this position. There are powers within me that make it possible for me to change and feel good and secure about the change. I do deserve it. This change is my birth-right which I claim. I can subsist on good feelings. I can sustain and endure them, just as I can endure pain or disappointment. I now decide to no longer believe in the fallacy that I can bear neither painful or good feelings. If there are any areas within me where I still battle and defend against either the painful or the loving feelings which are the giving and the receiving of love, the power in me can make me conscious of them. It can help me lift myself out of the groove that has been set by the negative force field and bring a new force field into being. I pray for the power, the belief, the faith, and the volition to be totally committed to living my life in a good, deeply feeling and honest way.

Even if some part of you still resists while you say these words, my friends, if your innermost will pronounces these words strongly and decisively, without covering up or denying the negative will, but meeting it head on, a new power will be created by the force of the intent within your thought. Only too often you wait for change to take place without your deciding for a new thought process about the issue in question. It is the thought that must change first. In thought lies the intent. This intent can then seep deeper and deeper into the still resisting layers of your consciousness. In that way the process takes place on the outermost and the innermost levels: on the outermost, by the volitional thoughts you issue forth; on the innermost, by the divine power you mobilize when you meditate for this specific help. In this way, you cannot fail to inactivate the power of the old negative force field, and create a new force field that will bring you into ever increasing fulfillment, meaningful life, joy, peace, and love.

The lack of understanding that exists in human beings about the power of thought and the power of feeling, and how these two together create magnetic fields which in turn create life experience, is very regrettable. The next decades will bring a change in this. You always have to begin where the thoughts and feelings are accessible, and that is in your conscious mind, in your conscious thinking, willing, and doing. If this were not so, it would be impossible to ever solve any problem. And it has been proven — on this path, as well as elsewhere — that often the most severely disturbed individuals completely reverse their painful lives into happy, healthy, unified, fulfilled lives, while individuals with much less disturbance stay put. The reason for this is that the former are more motivated to act on behalf of change and therefore succeed.

If you had to rely on mysterious processes you could not activate, you would indeed be left to a haphazard fate. But this is not the case. The immediate thought process is always available and your habit of thinking can be changed quite easily to begin with. A thought inevitably brings a new feeling, which then brings a new attitude. But you always have to begin where it is accessible, and you have to leap with your thought over the barrier of the I cannot into the realm of It is possible. You can say, These potentials exist in me and I claim them. I want to make them available.

More and more of you have recently begun to establish contact with your divinity. You have begun to experience who you really are. But still your hesitancy to avail yourself of this new power often keeps you unnecessarily away from the beauty of your inner reality. To reach it requires more and more investment, but could there be anything more wonderful? Could there be anything more worthwhile? This is the very aim of this path; you will no longer be needy because you will know that everything exists within you to fulfill every one of your needs. And instead of looking for where the needs can never be fulfilled, namely outwardly, from parents or parent substitutes, you will look inwardly where you can never be disappointed.

For that you must come with a clean heart. It is necessary to give up the dishonesty, the hiding, the projecting, and the game playing that exist on subtle levels in your consciousness and which you often manage to deny, even now, after you have temporarily admitted them into your consciousness. It is certainly not only possible to do this, but eventually everyone's fate to do so. To be free from these dishonesties is the natural, universal law, and really the easiest way. This is inexorably your fate. To hold on to what is most difficult and contorting and hurtful for your soul is senseless, because one day you must become your whole, real, joyous self: not this little ego, but the ultimate Creator of whom you are a manifestation.

If you listen into your deepest stillness, calling upon the Creator within you, the stillness in you will answer. This is inevitable if you really want to know peace. If you do not want to know peace, joy, and all conceivable fulfillment, then you have your clue: you wish to hold on to something dishonest that you are loath to give up. Look at it, look at it squarely. When you see it, you can confront yourself about why you want to hold on to it. Then you can make that leap in your thought process.

Here I come to the second part of this topic. One of the important obstacles to wanting to establish the channel with your real being and wanting to give up dishonesty is your guilt for pain you have inflicted, or are still inflicting. I touched upon this subject before, but the time has come to go into it more carefully.

Over these last years you have learned to open up to the pain you have endured, pain that has been inflicted upon you, first, by your parents when you were a child, and later by others. You have learned to no longer defend quite so much against such pain, and more and more you can feel and experience it fully and thus free yourself. However, your entire psychological movement has turned away from the other aspect of pain: feeling the pain of your guilt for having inflicted pain on others. This is so for partially good reasons. Every truth can be distorted. In the days of pre-psychology, religion had indoctrinated man with a distorted, debilitating guilt feeling: false guilts, fear of a punishing God, a guilt that did not make it possible for human beings to live in dignity and in the knowledge of who they ultimately are. In order to straighten out such distortions, the pendulum must always temporarily swing to the opposite extreme, until the right balance of truth is found.

I make a clear distinction between remorse and guilt: remorse is the deeply felt pain of your wrongdoing, yet without losing sight of your divinity. You become a better, stronger person when the pain of remorse is fully savored. Guilt crushes the self and denies its intrinsic divinity. The current trend, as a result of the pendulum having swung away from the opposite extreme, makes all guilt appear neurotic. In fact, there is a difference between neurotic false guilt and real guilt and one can hide the other. I have spoken of this before.

If you cannot bear pain that others inflict upon you, then you cannot experience in a constructive way the pain of your own guilt either. The guilt of your own distortions must be fully faced, felt, and understood in all its ramifications and chain reactions. Otherwise you can never be clear with yourself and unless you do so, you cannot be whole. You cannot look at yourself with love and respect, which means that you cannot be who you really are. Do this in a very realistic and well-proportioned manner, without exaggeration, hiding, or dramatization. It is possible to recognize the chains you are forging with your negative attitudes and the hurts you inflict with them, either directly or indirectly. The hurts of omission are no less hurtful than those of commission. Have you not been deeply hurt by what was missing in your life as a child? Was it your parents' inability to give more warmth, good feelings, and closeness? Well, you are inflicting the same on others by your vindictive imitation and perpetuation of the very attitude that hurt you most.

If you are crushed by the pain of your guilt, this is only because you have decided to opt for this reaction, my friends. Whenever you so wish, you can question the necessity of being crushed and listen to your inner stillness for the possibility of a new reaction. Yes, you will feel the pain of guilt, and so you should. But as with the pain others have given you, if you can fully accept it, it ceases to be pain. When you fully feel the pain and are motivated with your whole heart to give up the negative pattern, the pain of guilt will make way for a wonderful new energy: for light, hope, love, and beauty.

Violations of spiritual law can only be corrected when you learn to feel the hurts you have inflicted and still inflict without feeling annihilated or worthless, without crumbling under a load of guilt. Feel the pain of your withholding, of your spite, of your maligning whether in your mind or in actuality. When you hold on to any kind of negative intentionality, you cannot help depriving and hurting others, just as these attitudes must inevitably hurt you. For there is no conceivable difference between yourself and others. Whatever you do to others, you do to yourself, and vice versa. I have said this many times before, but in your mind you still make a distinction, so much so, that you go on being spiteful and hating.

Now, my friends, let yourself feel the pain of inflicting pain: feel it without crumbling, without exaggerating, without doubting your divine heritage. If you can do this, you have found the all-important key that will make you want to open up to your divinity with all its joy and with its eternal reality of love. If you cannot bear the pain of your guilt and look away from it, then you cannot feel deserving, and hence you must block the contact with God in you. So this is one of the most important keys you need.

Facing the guilt for the pain you inflict on others is really not very different from facing the pain you have received. In both instances you can exaggerate it and make yourself incapacitated for life, or you can decide not to feel it at all. Or you can allow the feeling, and say: Yes, others have made mistakes. I have made mistakes. They were blind and groping, and so was I. They were in darkness and I was in darkness. This is regrettable, but this is what we are all here for. I now lift my head in the dignity of who I am. I know the greater power within me will help me to feel the pain I have given and the pain I have received. This attitude can now be cultivated and pursued, my friends. You do have the courage; you do have the greatness; and you do have the possibility within yourself to feel this and become stronger and better, not weaker and worse, as you fear.

It is absolutely necessary that you trace all the connecting links between cause and effect, and be totally aware of pain received and pain given. See how one leads to the other, back and forth, in an endless chain reaction. It is in your power, any time you wish, to break this chain. When you decide to go into this area of your being to look at it, express your intent to avail yourself of all divine help in you. Call upon this help. Become so still that you can listen. Feel it and know its presence.

The apparent paradox is that the more you hide from the pain of your guilt, the more ruthlessly you punish yourself. Conversely, it is true that the more you face and feel that pain, the less you will need to punish yourself. The negative attitude of hiding from yourself what you are doing and really feeling creates a negative force field that perpetuates itself in the following way: punishing yourself for your unfaced guilt, you must stay in the very attitude that accumulates more and more guilt. You are truly caught in one of the most tragic of vicious circles: because you imagine that you cannot face the pain of your guilt, you cut yourself off from your heart, your center of being, and from your innermost life. You feel forever undeserving of joy. If you are undeserving of joy your needs must remain eternally unfulfilled. If you feel undeserving and unfulfilled you go on punishing the world for this painful frustration. You dare not turn to the wondrous magnificence of your inner presence to help you out of this trap because doing so would instantly fill you with light and joy. You feel that because you have given pain you do not deserve such an experience. But how can you break the negative pattern unless you avail yourself of the power of God within you? And you cannot experience God within you without also experiencing joy, peace, and light. How are you ever going to break the vicious circle unless you use this key?

Go into your inner stillness right now. Declare that you wish to feel the pain that is held in you, as it was given and as it was received, and that you wish to be the beautiful person you really are. Feel both the pain of your guilt and the beauty of your real self. Thus you alter the course you have set in motion and create a new force field because you demagnetize the old one. This is the way now, my friends. As you do this, as you feel the pain of the guilt and the pain of what has been done to you, it will become one and the same pain. You will then forgive yourself as you forgive others, as it was said in one of the greatest prayers. Then you will be free: free to let go and let God manifest through you more and more in your everyday life. Be infused with inspiration and wisdom, with joy and peace.

These are not mere words, my friends. They are the unshakable reality that can be verified by anyone who wishes to go on this path all the way. These are not promises nor abstract philosophies and principles. These are concrete actions to be put into everyday living. You will then no longer depend on others, but will be your real self, your divine self. You will therefore have true relationships, not dependent relationships. This is your ultimate fate. It is up to you how soon you make it come true.

Pathwork Guide Lecture No. 202

1996 Edition

June 16, 1972

PSYCHIC INTERACTION OF NEGATIVITY

Greetings and blessings for every one of my beloved friends here. The power of love and the strength of truth will unfold in you forever more as you grow on your path.

I would like to say to you, first of all, that the majority of you have learned to be aware of and admit quite a lot of negativity. So far the significance of this progress cannot even be perceived. It makes a lot of difference whether you are aware of your negative intentionality, or whether you blindly grope, act out, and consequently suffer a special kind of confusion that hurts more than physical pain. The benefit of this new awareness is equally great for yourself and for others. In this lecture I would like to show you what the unconscious psychic interaction between you and others means in terms of the loss of love and also the pain of guilt that I talked of in the last lecture.

When you are only vaguely aware of your negativity, only dimly sensing the hurt that it inflicts on others, you are caught in a battle of blame, self-justification, helplessness, self-rejection and self-doubt. You cannot help but hook others, with their own unconscious conflicts, into your negativity. You bind them in a struggle equal to the one I just described.

Many of you have already started to recognize that by denying your negativity you incur a double guilt. First, there is the guilt for the negative attitude in question. This we may call the primary guilt. Then you are involved in the guilt for denying this negativity, which we may call the secondary guilt. If the primary guilt were admitted and its consequences truly accepted, it would cease to be a guilt. But the secondary guilt must weigh heavily on everyone's soul. It is a burden that consumes much vital life energy. Your denial always implies inner or outer harmful acts toward others and may therefore truly be called a sin, because you punish others for your own failings, for your own negative intentions, lovelessness, untruthfulness, spite, and unfair demands.

If you are aware, for instance, that you do not wish to love and you do not pretend otherwise, this is your responsibility. If you realize that you pay a heavy price for a loveless existence, but you let it go at that, at least you do not hook others into your guilt for not loving. You will be alone, of course, but you have made a choice; you know it and you pay the price for it. You withhold from the world your wonderful love capacity, that is true, and in that sense you fail.

But when you blame others for your lack of love, even if you use their real shortcomings as your excuse, when you punish them for the result of your own unloving attitude and build cases in order to justify your own holding back, then you truly sin, my friends.

This process is most widespread, most common, and yet so subtle that only people who possess a considerable amount of self-awareness can begin to recognize it in themselves, and therefore also in others. It is a basic attitude. It exists in variations and with different degrees of intensity. The refusal to love, when not admitted, often manifests in the following attitude: I do not want to give you anything — whoever you may be — but I demand that you give me everything. If you do not, I will punish you. This attitude is very typical. The more concealed and the less consciously expressed, the more insidious its effect will be on the self and others. It is always relatively easy to deny, rationalize, distort, conceal, or use half-truths to justify this attitude.

Lately, several of my friends have become aware of this attitude and could admit it not only to themselves but also to their friends. When this happens, the influx of health, of the clean fresh air of psychic truth, is instant. It is the result of freeing yourself of the secondary guilt. The more you expose every detail of the disparity between your demands, your own ungiving intentions and the punishment you mete out when your demands are not being met, the more you clear yourself of guilt. The clearer you can see the preposterous unfairness of what you demand compared to what you give, how differently you insist on being treated from how you treat others, and exactly how you choose to punish — always so that you cannot be caught, so you cannot be made accountable — the quicker you will free yourself of a burden that causes depression, anxiety, worry, hopelessness, and often physical illness and material frustration as well.

One of the most popular ways for punishing others for not responding with love to your ungivingness is to render them guilty; to build the case in such a way that they seem to be the cause for your misery. You convince yourself quite successfully of this because you choose to see only the result of your withholding and spiteful or perhaps cowardly non-giving. You choose to ignore that others cannot respond the way you would like them to when your own psyche is still steeped in this negative, non-giving attitude toward life.

Your negativity says, I will deny the truth and will blame you for not giving me all and for not letting me get away with my one-sided demands. And if you dare to react to this I will punish you by hating you and by blaming you even more. Those who are at the beginning of their path, or those who have a very strong investment in their idealized self-image, which makes no room for this truth, will first think it is quite impossible that they, too, can harbor such an attitude. Your best gauge to determine whether and to what extent it exists, is to consult your mind and emotions. If you feel comfortable with others, without anxiety, if you expand your life in a joyous way; and if you regard occasional difficulties as meaningful stepping stones, then you have already vastly overcome this poisonous attitude. But you, too, must have had it and must have dealt with it in a truthful way. No one is entirely free from it to begin with. If you have not found this attitude, you must work your way through your pride, your investment in your pretense, your cowardice.

When you admit your negative intentionality you perform the most fundamental act of love. The moment you admit what you are doing, you are performing an act of love, my friends, whether you know it or not. If you do not admit your negative intent, you may give a lot, but never the real thing that counts most. You may give things, money, good deeds, even tenderness and concern, but they are hollow gifts without setting the other free by the honest admission of your negativity.

The guilt caused by your unfair demands, your spite, the withholding of your love, and the compounded guilt caused by punishing others for your misery, must erode your strength and your self-expression. It makes you truly weak. How can you, as long as you continue in this attitude, ever have faith in yourself, ever believe in your dignity as a free human being? You may try all sorts of artificial ways to instill self-confidence in yourself, but it will never work unless you face the secondary guilt and give it up by admitting it. Then you may even stay, if you so choose, with the primary guilt — the guilt of not wanting to love, but at least you have assumed the responsibility for this.

You see, my friends, this is a world of duality. So much confusion exists because of the either/or alternative and the topic under discussion is particularly prone to such confusion. Humanity is stymied by the concept that either oneself should be blamed — for whatever it may be — or the other person should. Either you are bad and wrong or the other is. This creates a serious predicament, making it impossible to be in truth. If you are wrong and the other person blameless, you feel that there is something not quite right about the situation. You feel also that an undue responsibility is placed on you. If you are the one to assume the sole burden of the blame, you surely expect to be ostracized. This assumption is an unbearable load; it is untrue and does not permit clarity. It makes you feel even more inferior and unlovable. Your misery seems a just punishment rather than a choice you are free to alter whenever you so decide. By assuming the sole blame, you give permission, as it were, to others to secretly act out their own negative intentions.

Or, conversely, if you have to be completely justified in explaining your behavior, then you also put yourself in a terrible predicament: you again feel there is something wrong; you know that making the other all bad does not fit the truth either. If you have to protect this pretense, which may seem desirable in order to whitewash yourself of guilt, you will become anxious, afraid, threatened with having your defenses penetrated — so you cannot afford to be relaxed, natural, and close to others. Your stake in your innocence prevents intimacy. Again, you cannot feel right.

Most human beings are still incapable of experiencing how their distortion and negativity directly affects, reinforces, and hooks into the distortions and negativities of others. They are still too involved in the dualistic struggle, defending their illusory self-image. They are therefore blind to the psychic reality of constant interaction between self and others. The either the self or the other is all bad attitude creates confusion, guilt, and self-doubt.

Psyche to psyche, the following interaction takes place. Suppose you inwardly say, I will punish you for not fulfilling my insatiable demands. I will not love you or give you anything. I will punish you by making you guilty, and if you want something from me, I will not give it to you. I punish you most effectively by making myself the victim, so you cannot blame or catch me. Suppose the other person is inwardly struggling with giving up a similar defense. Their resistance says: You must not give it up. Others are out to hurt, to victimize, to exploit you. If you open your heart to love, you will get nothing but rejection, unfairness, and hate in return. It does not pay. You had better remain closed up. Just imagine how your self-victimizing attitude will reinforce the irrational resistance of the other person to being open, vulnerable, and loving. The frightened part of the self, which is geared to protective negativity and withholding, will be set back considerably in this struggle whenever it encounters such a negative intentionality. This punishment often takes the form of severe accusations that malign the other's character. You may never have thought about it in these terms, but if you look closely, you will see that it amounts to just that. Or you may even use others' real failings as excuses to punish them for not living up to your demands and for not accepting a deal from you in which they give everything and you little or nothing on that level. On other levels, the case may be quite different.

The unconscious interaction in this area thus fortifies and justifies the conviction that negativity is a necessary defense. Viewed from this narrow vantage point, the position seems right. Thus when you pursue your negative intentionality, you are also responsible for the other. One of the apparently paradoxical truths of spiritual reality is that you are responsible for yourself and you are also responsible for the other, each in a different way. By the same token, others' negative intentionality hurts and hinders you and they are responsible for doing this to you. Yet they could not succeed if you would not tenaciously hold on to your own. In that sense, the responsibility is yours. Everyone has the choice of either using the other's bad intentions as an excuse to stay in their own or looking for a new way of responding to life. It is therefore equally true that you are exclusively responsible for yourself and others are exclusively responsible for themselves and that, everyone is responsible for the other person.

Since ultimately there is no division between the self and the other, both must be true. You are the others and the others are you. The separation is as much an illusion as the either/or duality. It is not that either you are responsible for yourself or for others, nor that others are responsible either for themselves or for you. There are no either/or's: it is all one.

Therefore, when you end the old pattern of blaming others in order to justify your unfairness and your unloving demands, you not only unhook yourself from this terrible double-bind, you also help unhook the other person. Of course, others should not depend on you; they must fend for themselves and find their own salvation. You may say, Others should not depend on my overcoming my negativities and problems so that they can overcome theirs. And you are both right and wrong. You are right that it is indeed others' responsibility and that they can do so no matter what you do, provided they really want to. Their effort, their investment and commitment to themselves determine the outcome, regardless of what others, including you, do. But you are also wrong in not seeing that by your act of truth, which is an act of love, you help set others free of their entanglements. When you make clear what your negative part is, you remove a great deal of confusion and doubt, so that the true picture of where and to what extent each party contributes to a negative involvement and psychic interaction can emerge. This has a tremendously liberating effect.

There are particular phases in human development where an entity finds it almost impossible to come out of his or her negative defense system, and of the conviction that this defense is necessary, unless one of those people with whom the person is entangled lets them off the hook by admitting his or her own negative intentionality, destructive attitude, dishonesty, and meanness. Just imagine how you would feel when someone close to you, who has given you pain by pointing out your real and your false guilts, but who has also confused you by the denial of his or her guilt, suddenly said to you: I realize that I do not want to give you love. I want to demand from you and then blame you, accuse you, and punish you when you do not comply with my demands. But I do not allow you to feel hurt, because although I want to hurt you, I do not want to be made to feel guilty by your hurt. Just imagine how this would set you free! How such an admission can suddenly clear up many confusions! It is not very likely that you would respond to this act of love by being self-righteous and acting the all-innocent one who has always known this and is now established as the innocent victim.

If you admit your similar unfair demands, your cowardice in giving your feelings, and your negative intentionality, it may indeed be hurtful for your pride, but truly for nothing else! The other who hears it has, in that moment, received a gift of love from you, even though you may still not want to love with your heart, with your feelings, with your inner being. But you have begun to love by being truthful.

By setting others free from the false guilt you have placed on them in order to conceal your own, you allow them to look at their own real guilt without self-devastation and without this painful inner struggle in which the mutual guilts and accusations are all confused. Release and clarification often lead to the solution of the deepest problems. It is as though the personality needed this outer grace, this helping hand. For the dishonest placing of guilt on others makes their true self-revelation almost impossible; it implies that if they admit guilt you are right in accusing them of being bad and of being the cause of your misery. This is how people are hooked together in denial, guilt-projection, either/or struggle, confusion, and negative interactions. Someone must begin to loosen the hook-up and disentangle the knots.

Negative intentionality is a defense. It stems from the innate belief that the world cannot be trusted and the only way the self can protect itself is by being as mean as the world is supposed to be — or meaner. When you admit your ill will, you help others to begin to trust in the decency of the world and of people. You can then begin to ponder, Maybe it is not so dangerous, after all. Maybe I am not all alone in my hidden shame and guilt. Maybe I can let go. Maybe I, too, can admit these feelings without being held solely responsible. What a difference this would be in your attitude toward life, in your spiritual position as a human entity!

Your energy system must begin to change. When you all work together in this honest way, love is not a command issued by the will and the mind; it is not an abstraction; it is not emoting, or a sentimental gesture. It is vigorous, assertive, and free. Honesty is the most needed and most rare form of love among human beings. Without honesty, the illusion will always remain that you are separate from others, that your interests are contradictory, that in order to protect your interests you must defeat others, and vice versa.

Only when you know your own negativity, my friends, truly own up to it, assume responsibility for it, and no longer project it onto others while distorting reality in order to be able to do so, will you suddenly gain new insight into other people's doings, so that even when they do not admit it, you will know what is happening. And that, too, sets you free. That, too, takes you out of the confusion and the guilt of Where am I at fault in my misery? How have I caused it? How have others caused it? — thus fluctuating between blame and self-blame. Neither leads to any solution. But the moment you assume responsibility for your negative, destructive attitudes toward others, even if others are not willing to do likewise, you see the picture clearly. You unhook yourself, not only by your admission and self-knowledge, but also by comprehending the negative intentions, the acting out, the dishonest projections of the other person. This is why everyone who admits the worst in themselves inevitably feels elation, liberation, energy, hope, and light as the immediate result.

Spiritual growth brings you the gift of knowing the inside of other people: their thoughts, their intentions, their feelings. This is not magic; it occurs naturally because in reality you and others are one. As you read your own mind accurately, you cannot help reading those of others — since in reality it is all one mind. Other people's minds are closed books only as long as you hide from your own mind. To be able to read others' minds would amount to dangerous magic if it came from an individual's psychic power. Such power could be abused. But whenever this ability grows organically as a byproduct of knowing your own inner makeup, it is natural and cannot be abused in the service of power drives and negativity.

What now seems like an altogether separate entity will be seen for what it is in undifferentiated reality, when deep truthfulness has been achieved. It will be seen that all is one, that there is only one consciousness. What a liberating experience to know and to see into others, to no longer be confused and torn! This ability grows from giving up your stake in hiding, projecting, denying, and distorting; it grows from giving up an attitude that not only confuses others around you who are in a similar state, but confuses you every bit as much.

We discussed in the last lecture the pain of guilt. The worst pain of guilt comes when you do not quite know what is your part of an interaction and what is the other's. This kind of suffering comes only from concealment. It tears you apart, makes you suffer, searching blindly, like a trapped animal. But you are your own victim. You have trapped yourself by choosing not to be honest.

Whenever human beings unfold into a more expanded state they need different tools. Let us take the simple analogy of someone who runs a business. When the business is still very small, the organization is adapted to the size and purpose of the firm. It is appropriate and therefore harmonious. But when the business expands, the organization created for a small establishment no longer fits the larger one. It would no longer be appropriate and could not run smoothly. If the owners were too rigid to change and persisted in holding on to the old, proven way, they would either fail in the expanded enterprise, or would at least find it very difficult to operate.

The same law, my friends, applies to your inner expansion. As you grow and learn about yourself, and therefore about others and the world, you experience life in deeper and more varied ways — which is, after all, your reason for being incarnated. As you gain understanding and learn to experience feelings which you have previously avoided, you are setting the stage, as it were, for an expanded operation. In practical terms this means that attitudes which were once useful now become destructive and limiting.

It happens so often on the path of evolution that entities grow in various ways and prepare the ground for necessary new attitudes toward life. Yet they can impede this expansion by their refusal to give up certain attitudes. So you must adapt yourself to new ways of responding to the world, my friends, responding differently to other people's reactions toward you, to what happens around you and also to what happens within you. This will come about, first, by knowing that your old response is a conditioned reflex created to fit a smaller way of functioning in life; second, by questioning that reflex and the beliefs behind it. Last but not least — and this is the basic theme of tonight's lecture — by choosing love, rather than separateness, as your way of being in the world.

Again, this must not be a mere word, a mere mental concept, a forced try, or a sentimentalized emoting that covers up many things you do not wish to admit. It must be put in action depending on where you are inwardly. Admitting your negativity is always an act of love, whether it is done directly to the person in question, where this is possible, or to a helper who is not personally involved with your negativity. It is still an act of love toward the universe. Wherever you find your negativity, my friends, even while you still choose to stay with it, contemplate that one day you will want to give it up in love for the universe, in love for yourself.

Love is the key. If you do not open your heart you must wither away. You have all seen that no matter how true some diagnosis may be, how many insights you have gained into the background, history and dynamics of a condition that gives trouble, unless you commit yourself to opening your heart, no real change can ever occur. You cannot be fulfilled, my friends, unless you let yourself feel from the heart. And it is no use pretending that you want to love, that you even do love, as long as you are frightened of feeling your feelings. To the degree that it is so, you hold back from loving.

You cannot be strong and courageous, you cannot love yourself, unless you love. It is equally true that only as you love others can you love yourself. The first step must be to be willing to love. You do not start loving simply because you so choose. You have to call the divine nature of your innermost nucleus to give you the grace of loving. The grace of God may manifest through you in making you open your heart and lose your fear of feelings, of being vulnerable. That is all you need. If you do not love, you have nothing. If you love, you have everything. But if you love falsely, as a pretense, it is much, much less loving and much more deceptive and harmful than when you admit your hate. Admitting your hate is more loving than an apparently loving act that denies the hate. Think of this, my friends.

Take the time to assimilate the material I have given and to establish the most real and vital of all direct communications: that with your spiritual self. To do this, you must eliminate your self-deceptions and pretenses. They always block the way to God in you. Those of you who have not yet found where and how they are unloving should set out to do so. Do not let yourself be deceived by where you are already loving. Ask yourself how fulfilled you feel in it. How warm and unthreatened you feel with others. How comfortable do you feel in life? That is your answer to how loving and how truthful you are. And then maybe the first step of love can be instituted: Admit your hate. Admit your punitiveness. Admit your spitefulness. To the degree you do so, you start loving. You have started on the bottom rung of the ladder of love the minute you admit the ugly truth that you wanted hidden and for which, on top of it, you rendered the other person responsible. You did this either by distorting reality or by using something that was partly true as your excuse.

Understanding this, my friends, requires a lot of meditation and genuine good will. But then, what a key this is to life! You must deeply want to see this. The more you resist expansion into a new mode of operation when you are ready for it, the greater and more painful the necessary crisis must be. The more volitional and unresisting, the smoother the transition into a new, more truthful, more loving state will be.

Now commit yourself to go further and deeper in this direction. Commit yourself to go all the way with it and thereby help yourself and those around you. Allow this to happen. It is the greatest blessing that can be. You will create the necessary new climate for a new environment — inside and out.

This was a blessed working year indeed, my friends. Many of you have manifested spiritual growth in visible expressions of a more fulfilled life, of more peace and security and of outer fulfillment as a result. The following years will become more so, as you expand your nucleus of spiritual learning and purification.

You are indeed blessed. Every step of truth, every step toward love, unleashes more spiritual energy. Every step of decency activates more of your divine nature. Be this divine nature!

Pathwork Guide Lecture No. 203

1996 Edition

September 22, 1972

INTERPENETRATION OF THE DIVINE LIGHT SPARK INTO THE

OUTER REGIONS — MIND EXERCISES

Greetings and blessings for all of you, my dearest friends. Particular blessings are given to the beginning of a new working year — a particularly significant one. For this year sees the fruition of a spiritual form, materializing into an earthly form.

The building of this is indeed a beautiful venture, with which you fulfill yourself because you fulfill your task in the universe. Whatever difficulties have to be overcome are an expression of the sum total of the body that all of you form. This group, as well as all other created entities, has its own spiritual body. A body consists of many aspects, just as the individual human being consists of many aspects.

Each human being is an aspect of the greater consciousness, which is all one. These are mere words for many of you, but they might possibly open up an inner experience for you through which you will truly know that you are all one in consciousness. Perhaps you can gain an inkling of this even now, when after years of work, you are able to recognize and deal with various aspects of your personality. Some of these are in disharmony with your conscious goodwill; others, in harmony. On the very deepest level there is an aspect of consciousness that surpasses in beauty, wisdom, strength, and love even your best intentions and capabilities in bringing harmony to your inner, and eventually outer, disharmonies.

You learn to identify with each one of your aspects and identify them, one by one. Thus you gain an inkling of the sum total of your manifest being, what you know as you. You learn to accept even those aspects that you do not like and thereby transform their energy, instead of separating yourself from them so that they manifest as external forces.

This applies to all creation. You are part of the universal consciousness, just as a specific aspect within you is a part of your total personality. Your intrinsic fear of bridging the gap between the little, separate ego consciousness and the all-consciousness stems from the idea that if you bridge this gap you will lose yourself. This, of course, is totally untrue. For the more you realize you are all, the more you will be yourself, the more complete you will be, not less.

It is creation's overall aim to bridge this gap and establish everywhere the all-consciousness. Again and again, you ask yourself why this gap exists. Many explanations have been given about the so-called fall — the Fall from grace or the fall of the angels, or whatever it may be called in religious terminology.

Let me now give you a new version of the same process. This is not just to inform you and teach you cosmology. What I will tell you about creation will be of immediate, practical value for your own development. Not only will it open you further to the deepest cosmic truth outside you, but you will find all these truths within you right now, if you wish to see them. Eventually you will understand on the deepest level why you identify with this separated ego consciousness, why you are so afraid of letting yourself merge with the greater consciousness. You will understand how illusory this fear is, and you will see that suffering actually comes from your resistance and is therefore unnecessary. These words will help open the door to deeper knowledge and to the experience of eternal, immutable truth.

Once again I must remind you how difficult it is to express reality within the confines of human language. For the terms and concepts of human language are fashioned according to a very narrow aspect of reality. Thus my words can always be misunderstood and distorted, or simply sound incomprehensible, confusing, and contradictory. Your three-dimensional terms can hardly contain the multidimensional verities beyond human grasp. Nevertheless, if you deliberately allow the understanding of your heart and soul, of your deepest intuition, to fill you, my words will reach you to some extent. There will be an echo of some inner understanding that can hardly be put into words.

Creation started — and of course it never really started, so when I say started, I am again squeezing a concept into human language, a concept for which there is no other word. Try to feel this truth! Creation started with the divine spark. The spark may have been tiny in an immense vacuum. Yet in this tiny spark was the utmost divine reality, comprising everything that is conscious within the most powerful creative energy, the most incredible wisdom and love. The infinitely good divine Creator aimed to fill this vacuum, a vacuum of nothingness, with the spark of the all. Gradually, the spark began to spread and slowly penetrate the darkness and nothingness of the vacuum. The spark had incredible light and glowing aliveness and allness. The vacuum formed an infinity in the outer regions; the spark, an infinity in the inner regions. Here a contradiction may appear in dualistic human terms. How could there be two infinities? It is truly impossible to convey this to the human consciousness — how it could be true that there is an infinity, but it is both vacuum and inner spark of eternal light, the later filling the former.

The eternal spark spreads inexorably its inner infinite regions. Perhaps

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